Need help! 5 nights zero sleep.

I am starting to get scared.  I go to bed knowing I won't sleep because I am so wide awake and amped. Can't function.  I start to get suicidal at this point. 

At what point do I break down and ask for sleeping pills?  Not sure if they would even work since Remeron didn't even. And I would likely build tolerance I am guessing if they did work. 

What can I do? 

I'm right here with you. Had a lot of stress, and now I'm having a really tough patch of anxiety and insomnia.

 

You can't give up. I too think about just ending the suffering, but you have to keep going.

 

Try meditation and CBT practices. It might give you a little break.

 

This is truly torture

@[8d...]

When I was completely off meds last time the insomnia was pure Hell but there were some signs of improvemen after so many sleepless nights.

 

Months of this now with no end in sight. Insomnia was already bad and then I muddled with Surmontil for a week then Remeron at 7.5mg and 15mg doses for a wk. Neither helped and now the situation looks grim. I think I really screwed up by adding those and stopping. 

 

I really don't know what I can do for relief. 

 

 

Yours sounds to be withdrawal, and all I can tell you from that, is the sleep will return.

 

My insomnia is anxiety/stress related, but my mind is stuck in the same loop as yours.

Sleep will return, you will not die.

If you are not working, lay down any time you feel exhausted and just close the eyes. Listen to the tv or music if silence is not good for you, just close your eyes and PRETEND to nap. The body will react and recover even in these moments of "rest". This is not the time to create any kind of sleeping routine. Wherever you are - if you feel weak and exhausted, lay down and do what I wrote. That helped me a lot.

Try not to react with panic on the chemical panic that is made by insomnia and is totally normal. Make it cosy for yourself, and take such a rest every 2 hours or even more. To prevent you are just laying around flat and in panic, switch rooms and do something between the "naps". If you can, a little walk is great in the fresh air.

 

It really belongs into withdrawal and gets better!

I don't understand how I was well in all ways and sleeping for a year. Now this is just as bad as the acute withdrawl or worse.

 

I feel like my dp/dr is worse with no sleep days on end. I feel like I am losing my mind. My head pressure is insane. And my whole brain feels microwaved. Can hardly converse.

 

I got maybe an hour after the 5 nights of zero.  This is not sustainable.  I went a few months prior where is was really bad but ever since I tried the two drugs it has gotten horrible. 

 

Hard to live on just rest. 

I don't understand how I was well in all ways and sleeping for a year. Now this is just as bad as the acute withdrawl or worse.

 

I feel like my dp/dr is worse with no sleep days on end. I feel like I am losing my mind. My head pressure is insane. And my whole brain feels microwaved. Can hardly converse.

 

I got maybe an hour after the 5 nights of zero.  This is not sustainable.  I went a few months prior where is was really bad but ever since I tried the two drugs it has gotten horrible. 

 

Hard to live on just rest.

 

your signature says you had some stressful events in the last 6 months. This can bring up symptoms but it doesn't mean you will not make it out this hell again. It is hard to live on just rest, of course. But you cannot imagine how a human can survive. Insomnia is not the worst.

How about your stress level in daytime now? Are you working? What about stress? What do you do (strategies) to calm yourself down?

With the lack of sleep and I think trying the Surmontil and Remeron my stress is way up.  The stresses from last year were a death, having to move, and stopping work.  I am not working right now. Basically trying to just get through the day. I try to go for walks and deep breathe. 

With the lack of sleep and I think trying the Surmontil and Remeron my stress is way up.  The stresses from last year were a death, having to move, and stopping work.  I am not working right now. Basically trying to just get through the day. I try to go for walks and deep breathe.

 

so your system was stressed emotionally and physically and that is a lot. You are going through a hard time in life.. could you maybe, just maybe,.. add the thought that you are already doing everything it needs to recover? This once came into my mind when I was at the lowest point and no one had the answer. It helped. Set some energy free somehow. Waves come and go and the more stress we get, especially in the first years. I just want to encourage you to surrender and have trust, I know it sounds weird and crazy but sometimes its the only helpful thing we can do.

I would NOT take any med. Have you tried herbs like passion flower, valerian or arena sativa (thats oat plant)?

Do you know osteopathic treatments? this has always made me calm and relaxed my hole body.

 

You are not alone. If you need to vent or to cry we are here..

Thanks Marigold,

I can't even cry. My emotions are gone. Just fear.

 

I have tried those herbs but only in teas. Have not gone to osteo. My anxiety is so bad now.  Wonder if it is mostly the sleep deprivation or the Remeron screwed me up.  Trying hard to avoid meds but at my breaking point.

 

Thanks Marigold,

I can't even cry. My emotions are gone. Just fear.

 

I have tried those herbs but only in teas. Have not gone to osteo. My anxiety is so bad now.  Wonder if it is mostly the sleep deprivation or the Remeron screwed me up.  Trying hard to avoid meds but at my breaking point.

 

Do not underestimate the effect of "trying" different drugs, even short time. Your CNS is on high alert, and the last months had to survive so much. Have trust and do your body something good - this is possible even while suffering. Starts with a nice pillow, a teddy bear or whatever. Even if you cannot feel the joy it is a sign that finds your heart. promise.

Back in september I was on a taper plan that my doctor gave to me. I was on a medicine for 30 years at 400 mg a day. She pulled me off 250 mg in about 3 or 4 weeks.

 

By october and november i was in the emergency room two or three times for insomnia. At its worse I went three days with no sleep then the next night I got maybe 5 hours. Then I went 9 days with zero sleep. I thought i would go insane. The insomnia was horrific for 2-3 months. During the those nights I just laid in bed and tried to rest. I would close my eyes and just allowed by body to rest.

 

Nothing works for this insomnia but time. I tired all the herbs, warm milk, breathing exercises, stretches, sleeping medication etc nothing helped.  Finally I started getting 20 minutes or so of sleep. Then 20 minutes every couple hours. Then a couple hours a night. I am now sleeping 5-6 hours a night after 6 or 7 months of healing and time.

 

The only thing that i could say that might help is jogging or walking. I would get up after not sleeping for two days and jog for a mile or so. I had watched a video where they said hard cardio exercise built new neuron paths in the brain. So i tried that. I also have filled myself with every nutrient I can find.

 

Just dont get scared and accept it. Make sure if you cant sleep to lay in bed all night and relax and rest your body. Dont get tore up and mad and stressed out.

 

If you need support you can always PM

 

 

One of the hardest things I had to understand and learn was that I cold no longer rely on a pill to fix what was wrong with me. I took benzos for insomnia and only ended up in a world of misery. During my WD I decided to never take a pill for anything except true medical need. I have essential hypertension and do take meds for that now. If I have an infection, I will take antibiotics. But NO psych meds, not ever again. I would rather lie in bed awake for hours than take another benzo or AD.

I am an RN and have been one for over thirty years. I used to believe in pills. Now, I dont,. At least, not for ME. What benzos did to me is almost beyond belief, as they almost killed little old me. My former doctor told me several times he thought I would die because of the damage benzos did to me. He was a jerk in many ways but in this, he was right. I no longer see him. I now see a doctor who is calm and willing to let me direct my care. I will never trust a doctor again, either. That is how much my benzo WD changed me.

Ocean,

 

Your situation sounds like it was tough for those 2-3 months. At what point point did the multiple nights of no sleep stop? Just time was the main factor?

 

I wish I knew if I just held on a couple more months that I would see signs of recovery. My drug history is long and messy so I fear permanent damage. My symptoms of dp/dr, no emotions, and blank mind seem like damage since they have not changed in 6 months. No laughing or crying in this time.  I wish someone who recovered from all these things would contact me.

Eastcoast,

How bad was your insomnia?  Did you experience some of the other symptoms I am?  Total anhedonia and loss of emotion and blank mind are as bad as insomnia.  I feel like a robot.

Ocean,

 

Your situation sounds like it was tough for those 2-3 months. At what point point did the multiple nights of no sleep stop? Just time was the main factor?

 

I wish I knew if I just held on a couple more months that I would see signs of recovery. My drug history is long and messy so I fear permanent damage. My symptoms of dp/dr, no emotions, and blank mind seem like damage since they have not changed in 6 months. No laughing or crying in this time.  I wish someone who recovered from all these things would contact me.

 

Trust me, my history is just as bad. Not only was I dealing with insomnia but I was coming off a epilepsy drug and dealing with insomnia. Sleep  deprivation can really bad with someone with a history of seizures.

 

But I started getting off the medicine because I was having weird symptoms  like severe dry mouth, burning mouth and brain buzzing before I even started tapering.

 

It was either get off the medication or have permanent damage or die. These medications cause many problems if you are on them long term.

 

The insomnia lasted many months but it was severe in that october to january time frame. I would look on youtube and I saw no one that had been awake as long as i had. I remember being at the 5 day mark and watching a guy's youtube channel and he had posted a video that he had made at 7 days. I  thought surely I will get sleep before that. But the seventh day came. Then the eighth then the ninth. I found no one that had been up that long. Thats what scared me the most - not finding anyone else that had been up as long as I had.

 

I also couldnt nap at all. I would try to nap and right when I would almost fall to sleep my body would jerk like I had been shoved by someone. I still havnt napped. Its been a year or more since I have taken a nap thats lasted more than 10 - 20 minutes.

 

But on the ninth night I fell to sleep. I dont remember how long - Im sure it wasnt for long. And from there it got a little better. There was always patches after that where I would go two or three nights with out sleep but it never got as bad as it had been.

 

For a while I took a small piece of a seroquel pill. I had been prescribed 50 mg pill but I did not want to take the whole pill. I had already had dry mouth and the seroquel made the dry mouth even worse. It also made me deathly sick the following day. So, I would the 50 mg pill and cut a very small piece off of it and take it maybe every few days when I would be without sleep for more than two or three days.

 

Even on the nights when I didnt take the seroquel the sleep was coming back.

 

So I'm sure in your case the sleep will come back. Just give it time. I know its miserable. But it will come back.

 

Also you mentioned the other WD symptoms. I also had all the other classic WD symptom. I had them all - burning skin, brain buzzing, nausea, tingling, numbness, double vision, DP, DR, crying at a drop of a hat, stomach pain, pain in side, leg cramps, gastro problems, dry mouth, weak muscles. It's been astounding at the amount of side effect ive had. I cant even remember them all.

 

You will get thru it.

 

Good luck.

Please don't shoot the messenger but I just wanted to share something that helped me... I did not find BB until my third week of withdrawals and learned a ton very quickly. However; at about Day 13 after I had not slept for a good week - I took Melatonin AND Benadryl on the advice of my Aunt.  I do not remember the amounts but it knocked me out cold. Of course I would wake up with a racing heart and instant fear but at least I got a few hours of sleep.  I then learned from BB that this could cause MORE withdrawal symptoms and stopped taking it.  I never went back to total insomnia but had to spend endless hours during the day resting because  of fatigue and not sleeping at night.  This cleared for me at three (3) months and then came back with a vengeance in Month 5 for 6 weeks.  I admit that I reverted back to the melatonin and benadryl out of desperation and have no idea if that impacted how long that wave was but it helped again as I was able to sleep for a few hours.  I feel for you guys!  But know that at 11 months - I sleep fine.  Unless I overdo the physical activity or have mental stress then I wake with those "starts" of body jerking - like I was falling in my sleep but worse.

Please don't shoot the messenger but I just wanted to share something that helped me... I did not find BB until my third week of withdrawals and learned a ton very quickly. However; at about Day 13 after I had not slept for a good week - I took Melatonin AND Benadryl on the advice of my Aunt.  I do not remember the amounts but it knocked me out cold. Of course I would wake up with a racing heart and instant fear but at least I got a few hours of sleep.  I then learned from BB that this could cause MORE withdrawal symptoms and stopped taking it.  I never went back to total insomnia but had to spend endless hours during the day resting because  of fatigue and not sleeping at night.  This cleared for me at three (3) months and then came back with a vengeance in Month 5 for 6 weeks.  I admit that I reverted back to the melatonin and benadryl out of desperation and have no idea if that impacted how long that wave was but it helped again as I was able to sleep for a few hours.  I feel for you guys!  But know that at 11 months - I sleep fine.  Unless I overdo the physical activity or have mental stress then I wake with those "starts" of body jerking - like I was falling in my sleep but worse.

 

I think it depends on how long you have been on the medication that you are withdrawaling from. At my worst i took melatonin, benadryl, seroquel, hydro -something or another and trazadone. None of them even came close to putting me to sleep. So I just said screw it and stopped taking them and tried to get thru it.

 

One night i took a trazedone the hydro (dont remember name) and a couple benadryls and ...nothing. That was on the nine day stretch. But like i said I had been on my medication for 30 years. So I cant imagine anything helping the gaba receptors at that time.

 

But i think if you are into months of no sleep that you should take something occasionally to sleep and to rest your body. Just not every night so your neurons and receptors can heal.

Oh god, maybe 1 hour of sleep total for the whole week. Benadryl and melatonin don't help me.  Nothing seems to. If I can just hang on there has gotta be signs of improvement from this, right?  At this rate I cannot see surviving 2 months.

Oh god, maybe 1 hour of sleep total for the whole week. Benadryl and melatonin don't help me.  Nothing seems to. If I can just hang on there has gotta be signs of improvement from this, right?  At this rate I cannot see surviving 2 months.

 

 

I dont want to sound harsh but this is withdrawal. You never think that you can easily survive the next days or weeks. You have taken some medications, I assume also as a combination, - it takes time for the system to build up the essential natural sleep bringer... In most success stories you can read that insomnia was horrible and the buddies are fine now. I remember how I wrote in my diary that I was convinced I would die. The next second. Or go crazy and end up hospitalized. Nothing happened, I am fine now. The periods of zero sleep get better and sometimes we even fall into a very light sleep mode but our CNS is so over alerted that we do not feel it. I had a tracking system on my arm that showed I even got REM sleep, and I could not believe it because for me it was like I had been awake all night. Besides this, I had 10 days in a row without any sleep or nap, - then slowly it got better.

So many here had told me so and that healing is not linear... I hope it gets better for you soon!

Really nice post, Marigold.

I tried several OTC things and none helped a bit. One doc put me on Seroquel, for heavens sake. Didnt help at all so I ditched it asap.

What I finally had to learn was NOT to take a pill when I didn't sleep or feel well. It was the simple.

What did help me sleep naturally was sleep hypnosis videos on YouTube ;Took about a month and a half, and then the subliminal message took hold and I could fall asleep naturally. If you need help finding these, just PM me.

I did not sleep at all for OVER a month. Truly. But your brain has a nifty way of preventing death from lack of sleep. You have "micro sleeps", moment when you brain blanks out. And this was found studying prisoners of war who were deprived of sleep for long periods.

The brain in benzo wd  is truly astounding. so many possible symptoms, it truly boggles your mind what these rugs do.

Uncomfortably...I recommend going to the Sleepio website. It is a web version of CBT-I.CBT-I is specifically for insomnia. Sleepio is very legit and evidence based. I did the 6 week CBT-I course too but did both before I began tapering. I am now weaning off benzos. I do NOT function without sleep and that's why I am on sleeping pills. I managed well enough until I turned 50.  There are seeping pills that are not benzos -trazadone is one -but I failed that too. Powerball

Uncomfortably...I recommend going to the Sleepio website. It is a web version of CBT-I.CBT-I is specifically for insomnia. Sleepio is very legit and evidence based. I did the 6 week CBT-I course too but did both before I began tapering. I am now weaning off benzos. I do NOT function without sleep and that's why I am on sleeping pills. I managed well enough until I turned 50.  There are seeping pills that are not benzos -trazadone is one -but I failed that too. Powerball

 

no one functions without sleep. Its funny that people on pills always assume that the ones who refuse a pill are able to function without.

These pills are made for the fear of not being able to function any more. That is logical.

They just should write on the package that you will not be able to function any more AT ALL when you keep taking the pills. And other advices. But why should they. Its about money.

I am starting to get scared.  I go to bed knowing I won't sleep because I am so wide awake and amped. Can't function.  I start to get suicidal at this point. 

At what point do I break down and ask for sleeping pills?  Not sure if they would even work since Remeron didn't even. And I would likely build tolerance I am guessing if they did work. 

What can I do?

 

Hello,

 

You speak about your complicated drug history as well as life stressers.  These things can contribute to a surge of withdrawal symptoms, particularly insomnia.  Your system is very sensitive, even this far off benzos. You've received some very good replies from members, those who have walked the same path you are on.

 

What we want people to do if facing difficult times is to seek out the proper resources. None of us here are trained to deal with suicidal thoughts and feelings.  However, there are professionals who can help . Self-Harm Resources

 

Additionally,  references to self-harm are triggering to many of our members. Most people going through withdrawal are fragile and we must make certain that BB is a safe place for all.

 

pianogirl

 

Sorry, I didn't want to trigger anyone.  I appreciate the tips and I am trying to be active and get sun. Tried Cbd oil and cbn without success.  When I close my eyes I feel more awake. It is disturbing. 1hr sleep in 8 days.  Reaching previous record soon. Anyone also experience head pressure and burning?  It is 247.  Is this neuropathy this or damage? Does it get significantly better if sleep comes back?