Stuck in high alert mode and never feel sleepy

I am suffering from severe sleep deprivation.  No perceived sleep for long stretches again.  No sense of sleepiness ever for past 5 months. Brain just does shut off. Before it seemed like it was just a matter of mainly waiting it out. It was horrific but got better over several months.  It is not budging this time. I don't know if this is a wave or what at this point. 

 

In desperation, I have recently tried Remeron and Benadryl with no success. Should I just try and survive this with no medication or supplements.  The last option I am thinking is marijuana but I am guessing that may be a problem when I want to stop.   

cbd oil it does not work for every one but i get a few nights sleep from it about 4 hours better than nothing it does not work every night on me though .

Cbd oil did not help.  I am suffering really bad. Now going more than a week with zero sleep at a time. Never sleepy. Really feels like this will kill me unless I can get an hour or more soon.

yes it doesnt work for me anymore was good a for a couple weeks now i have been up for a week straight so i no what your going through it sucks .

Nothing touches this insomnia. Melatonin sometimes made my eyes heavy but now nothing.  Remeron would work for first night, now doesn't. I am worn down and the brain just won't shut off. Really scared now.

For the past month I have only had 3 sleeps and only with meds.  The suffering becoming intolerable. On top of this, horiific head pressure, no emotions, blank brain, memory problems, and severe derealization.

This feels permanent.  Don't know what the Hell is going on. If this is withdrawal retriggered or depression/anxiety.  Doctors really don't wanna hear much about withdrawal and suggest giving multiple meds AD and lithium and TMS or shock.

I know you're deep in hell right now and it's extremely difficult to think clearly. Please be careful, however, about believing what your mind is telling you. Like your mind is telling you that "this is permanent." So then you engage with that thought over and over (that is really a feeling of hopelessness), this makes the thought stronger, establishes more of a neural pathway (so your mind will return to that thought more easily and more frequently) even though it isn't a *fact*. The only facts here are that you are 2 years off (I think that's the amount), you've had minimal perceived sleep this past month, you have numerous symptoms related to sleep deprivation, and that your brain hasn't had adequate time to recover yet from this wave in wd.

 

Your sleep will get better. I don't know when but neither does your mind (despite its urgent insistence that it's permanent). This super extreme insomnia happens to a smaller percentage of us but all of us who have gone before you have reached a point where sleep has improved. Maybe it's not where we'd like it to be, but it gets better. Try to let yourself believe this. Your brain isn't different or more broken. It's just taking a while. You're not the only one who has experienced this and you won't be the last. Hang on the best you can and put one foot in front of the other. Take one breath at a time.

MT

I always appreciate your guidance. I try to tell myself it isn't permanent but it is so hard when there is no glimmers of hope for so long.  The insomnia has been going on since January now and has progressively gotten worse. I had the no emotions (haven't been able to cry or laugh or feel anything), blank mind, dp/dr a couple months before the insomnia started up again.  So I am confused as to what is going on.  I know if I could sleep likely my head pain would be better but not sure about the other symptoms.

 

My brain feels weird trying to smile and familiar music gives me uncomfortable tingling sensations. This is all terrifying me that there is some sort of damage. 

 

I am hanging on.  It would be easier if I could at least sleep. 

uncomfortablynumb1, how much do you think you are actually sleeping now?

I am going many days and weeks now with zero sleep I am aware of. No signs of getting better. It is unbelievable that there is no relief.