Unable to drive or sit in the car? Anyone?

Hi,

I’m 57 and was on benzos over 10 yrs. daily intake of 1.5 to 2mg clozapam . Since my forced cold turkey last January 2018 I’ve been unable to handle the overstimulation of a moving car. I have not found anyone experiencing this and think the damage is an underlying problem plus ramped up by the C/t. Nobody believes me about this. But the sxs and terror inside a car give me bad chest pain, short of breath, unable to swallow. I drove a few times and didn’t know how I’d make it home. I had someone drive me and same paralyzing sxs . I’m not even believing myself that it’s this bad at this point. Anyone have long term paralysis by something after the rapid, forced withdrawal?

Hi,

I’m 57 and was on benzos over 10 yrs. daily intake of 1.5 to 2mg clozapam . Since my forced cold turkey last January 2018 I’ve been unable to handle the overstimulation of a moving car. I have not found anyone experiencing this and think the damage is an underlying problem plus ramped up by the C/t. Nobody believes me about this. But the sxs and terror inside a car give me bad chest pain, short of breath, unable to swallow. I drove a few times and didn’t know how I’d make it home. I had someone drive me and same paralyzing sxs . I’m not even believing myself that it’s this bad at this point. Anyone have long term paralysis by something after the rapid, forced withdrawal?

 

I cannot drive yet.  However, being a passenger relives some of the dizziness for me.  CT December.  The 1st two months after CT, I was terrified of being in the car.

 

SaraSue 

Thank you for responding SaraSue. I spent all of last summer in horrendous withdrawal, this summer some of the sxs have abated but the ones now are just as dysfunctional. Today I’m so angry about my life.

I also did a CT in January 2018. I am just starting to drive short distances. I cannot drive yet on the main highway to any destination, but sometimes I am able to drive back home. When I am in a wave I am not comfortable riding in a car especially if I think that person is not a very good driver. I force myself to drive up the road a few miles 2 or 3 times a week and visit a few people or just drive to the post office or garbage dump. When my brains feels like it is moving I just stay home.

 

We will get better.

 

PG

 

Victoriously,

 

I’m so sorry.  This winter in withdrawal was brutal.  I was expecting to be well and out and about by Summer not happening!  Symptoms are so numerous.  I’m hoping healing is much better by Winter, don’t think I can take another cooped up withdrawal Winter!

 

We are healing. 

 

 

I also did a CT in January 2018. I am just starting to drive short distances. I cannot drive yet on the main highway to any destination, but sometimes I am able to drive back home. When I am in a wave I am not comfortable riding in a car especially if I think that person is not a very good driver. I force myself to drive up the road a few miles 2 or 3 times a week and visit a few people or just drive to the post office or garbage dump. When my brains feels like it is moving I just stay home.

 

We will get better.

 

PG

 

PG,

 

This feeling of our “brains moving” is so odd.  Happy you are driving short distances.  CT sxs have been brutal.  Tired of being at home.

 

Healing is happening.

 

SaraSue 

Thank you for your post PG, I was forcing myself to drive short distances also and realized I can’t even do that! I don’t know if I’m giving in or giving up but now with the bright sun it’s even more ramped up! Ugh!

I still get super anxious while driving, along with some air hunger and tightness in my chest. It’s been going on so long that I’m starting to ignore it! I know now that when I’m done driving that I calm down pretty quickly. I’m almost st the 11 month mark.

Sara Sue, I understand what you’re going through thinking... maybe by spring, maybe by summer, maybe, maybe and the sxs are still so ramped up. I’m praying for you. The rest of my life is a horrible mess too boot. That adds to all this w/d insanity. I wish you the best!

Vic

Thanks for your post eazigone. I’ve wanted to reinstate for this reason alone. Being housebound. Trying to hold onto hope of healing without any more benzos.

 

Sara Sue, I understand what you’re going through thinking... maybe by spring, maybe by summer, maybe, maybe and the sxs are still so ramped up. I’m praying for you. The rest of my life is a horrible mess too boot. That adds to all this w/d insanity. I wish you the best!

Vic

 

Thank you, Vic.

 

Yes, I’m thinking in terms of season changes.  I hope you get your life in order.

 

SaraSue

When all this was first settling in, tolerance, before I had the slightest clue it was my benzo, I was going to band practice about 45 minutes away, and every time I got out of the car, I felt whacked out of my mind and super anxious. I was like what the hell is going on? it didnt occur to me at first that it was even the car ride, or the benzo, I just thought I was feeling weird from anxiety and being recently sober.

 

I had this powerfully for a long time, and while I still feel uncomfortable to certain degrees, it has greatly diminished.

 

 

 

Thanks Luke. I’m terrified I’ll pass out behind the wheel from the sxs. This started back in early 2000’s and the doc put me on the benzos. Tolerance happened in around 2008 and now I know what it was. Today I’m suicidal that I’m too terrified to go out in the car. Invites from friends  offering to drive. It’s been hell riding in the car. I know I’m beating this to death and I apologize, but I’ve got so much pent up anger and resentment. My attitude was pretty good til the spring came now I’m in a really bad spot.

Vic

No need for apologies at all, because when youre in the thick of it, in the car, or just getting out, and you feel like youre way overstressed and going to freakin drop, its awful. And the kicker for all these bizarre symptoms is all the description and words in the world, even to fellow BBers, doesnt quite equate to what we actually feel like. the words dont add up to the terror of exactly what youre talking about.

 

ive had other triggers for that nervous system overload feeling, its horribly difficult to even walk straight much less engage with life and people.

 

ill never totally be able to describe it, but I will say again that this will subside, it will. Ive had this and many other things really bad, strong, and it feels like its ingrained in you, like its a part of you and it wont ever relent. it will though.

 

im still a long way from "healed" argh...but the hardest, worst feelings, the agoraphobia (the fear of &^%ing everything), the over sensitized nervous system thing, the flight or fight turned to 11, etc, those symptoms have all taken a fairly major dip in intensity from when they were at their worst....

 

hang in there! get through as you can, and if it means you have to sit some things out, well then do so and embrace the chance to rest.

Luke,

Thanks so much again for your post 🤗, the way you described it is exactly what I’m trying to explain but cannot. I know there aren’t any real guarantees in life but coming on BB at least helps ya hang in there in spite of it all. Today my eyes are going to pop out of my head, then my head to follow, lol. I need to go for a long walk.

Vic

I can relate to this. Being in a moving car (or any form of transportation, even trains) gave me major anxiety and even panic attacks. I'm 18 months off and it's much better now. Still not at all fully gone though, unfortunately. My goal is that I can drive alone again without any problems.

Thank you so much for your post NS, I’m sorry you’re experiencing this hell as well. Sitting at home staring at my phone most of the day and no ability to live life normal. It gets really old. Thank you for reaching out!

I could not possibly drive during wd. Later on, I realized that my driving was not safe and had not been so for several years, thanks to benzos. A friend drove me to doctors appointments and grocery stores. I was NOT a safe driver!

Luke made so truly great advice. He knows what he is talking about.

Please try to understand that you WILL heal from this. Good Lord, I took tons of benzos for 30 years and somehow managed to heal. It took quite a bit of time, but it was SO worth fighting for. Nor do I think my case is special or different in any way. I just took benzos for way too many years, and suffered the consequences of that, in health problems,  falls, fractures, etc. Be glad you didn't got that far, my friends.

Keep on going no matter what. You will make it through this.

east

East coast ,

Thank you for posting. Hearing back from others who suffered in similar ways is extremely appreciated. I hope and pray to pull through this , as hopeless as it seems on many days.

im 12 months out and feel the same. now just getting in a car can give me panic. too much stimulation being in a car for sure. makes my brain and vision all wonky. I hope this is not permanent.

I hear you Hl01. I’m at 16 months since the initial cold turkey and not even close to being back to normal. Last week a friend took me out to a couple of places. I was so glad to get out but I had to sit in the backseat and not look out the windows too much. It’s very weird but my body “senses” a bridge before arriving at it. These symptoms are worst of all when coming to any bridges or curvy, hilly roads. I’m worried about passing out or worse in the car and then harming others. This crap isn’t funny.

I have car terrors too. I'm about 5.5 years off but my car terrors began a little over 2.5 years ago right before my horrendous setback. Just about two months shy of my 3 year anniversary off benzos is when that happened and my agoraphobia got 100X worse. This June will be two years since I've ridden in a car or even left my house. I was going for car rides before (just riding, there's NO way I can drive) just to get out of the house now I'm stuck here. This sucks because I used to love road trips and at one time in my life I was a taxi driver in MPLS/St. Paul with no problems. You're definitely not alone when it comes to car terrors and I've come across quite a few people here that do too. They say this all comes to an end someday. The sooner the better.

Thanks for reaching out Rockfan, I agree, the sooner the better.