Should tapering from only 0.5 clanozapam be that hard?

Hello everyone,

 

So, I started taking clanozapam about 12 years ago after a horrible derealization experience. I took 0.5 mg three times per day. I was also put on 300 mg of the SNRI effextor to help with the derealization/existential thoughts + my OCD (which started several years earlier).

 

Six years after that I gradually stopped taking the benzo because I didn't felt I need it anymore. And...I mostly didnt.  I went down to 2 pills per day the 1 then nothing...I wasn't tapering off, I was unaware of such things as withdrawal symptoms...I simply saw that I still felt fine and had no use to them. The weird thing is that I had no WS. And that after taking 1.5 a day for six years. Maybe because I was on the SNRI?

 

A year after that I started taking 0.5 mg about 3 times a week, before I needed to drive on an highway. I've been doing that for like...4 years. I think.

 

Last year I got off the SNRI. I tapered down and it wasnt fun but I did it.

Not too long after my last dose, several weeks maybe, I had a hugeeee panic attack. very intense Derealization and, for the first time, also experienced some DP. (Didnt felt out of body though...just feeling like I dont exist. Like...what the hell am I?). It was terrifying and after that I started taking 0.5 mg per day.

 

fast forward to now, 9 months later - Im tapering down from the benzo as they dont seem to help that much. Or at all, actually. Anytime I start to feel a bit better with the DR/DP I have a setback and go back to square 1. its like a week/2 week cycle. Feel a bit better then boom. No progression. I started to think that maybe the benzo prevents my brain from healing, as I had setbacks in the past but eventually I was able to move forward and now I seem to be stuck for months with no end in sight. But I just dont understand how the hell could I take in the past 3 times the amount I'm taking now and feel good while now third of it makes me feel bad.

 

So, I started to tapper. reducing 0.1 mg per 2 weeks (switched to liquid form of clanozapam in order to do that). I'm now on 0.3 mg per day and its just...hell. bloody hell. I dont understand why it's so tough. I'm tapering slowly, right? and the initial amount wasnt that much. The amount of anxiety I feel just dont seem proportionate to the amount of clanozapam I'm decreasing. only bloody 0.1 mg.

That makes me fear that Its not the benzo at all that made me to get stuck in my DR/DP anxiety cycle, and that getting off them wont make me feel better either, only worse.

Maybe the anxiety isnt a withdrawal symptom at all? since it is the only WD i seem to have?

 

Would love to hear your input.

 

Bloody hard guys.

 

cheers

 

 

Hello DanSnow !

 

We are very glad that you found us!

 

I am sorry you are having issues with Clonazapam. You have a great start with your taper. You may want to consider tweaking the taper rate. A symptom based taper reducing 5-10% every 10-14 days is recommended by others who have struggled and succeeded. I have read many reports by folks who also claim the same experience with multiple benzo withdrawals. It seems similar to the kindling effect that happens with alcohol cessation(s).

 

I would also like to suggest that you do some research on the various boards. Becoming well informed should better enable you to make difficult decisions as well as provide you with the tools you need for a successful taper & recovery.  You will find many knowledgeable members who will support your efforts to be benzo free. I have enclosed a few links below that may help you. Check them out!

 

Wishing you a smooth taper & speedy recovery!

Bella 

 

 

 

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I started 1mg klonopin for sleep, and had no issues with extreme anxiety, derealization, or depersonalization prior to tapering benzos.  Yet I was stuck in a severe state of derealization for 3 months while tapering and for several weeks after stopping.  Therefore, it really is too soon to know whether the derealization is from the taper, or if it is part of your underlying anxiety, since you had it in the past.