Parenting while suffering with anxiety/panic

I’m a mother of 3 children.  Two girls (21 and 19) who are away at college and a son who is in high school.  I’m am 9 years off Klonopin. Looking back I’m not sure how I got through the withdrawal while parenting them when they were younger.  I know Benzo Buddies was a huge help to me going through the withdrawal. Everyone here helped me understand that it was a chemical issue and a healing process for my CNS.  I think knowing that helped me push through and once the windows started I became hopeful.  I am having problems again with anxiety.  I am grateful that my daughters are away and not witnessing this but they’ll be home for summer soon. My son is home though.  I’m sure there are a lot of parents out there who are suffering too and trying to keep a brave face for their kids.  I’m hoping we can help each other with ideas and words of support.  I’m not going through withdrawal, so my circumstances might be a little different.  I just know that I don’t want my kids to be affected by this.

Hi. My daughter is 24 and I have no other children. However, I think people here might benefit from a group like this, so I'm going to "bump" you up. Good luck!  BUMP!

Thanks for the bump.  Hopefully others will respond and we can get some good ideas and support flowing.

I am not off and my son is three so probably doesn't really understand my issues. I don't know what things will be like when I finish tapering nor how old he will be. I didn't find out my dad had panic attacks and anxiety until well after I started having them in my late 20's. I wish he had told me about them as I might have been able to gain some knowledge from him. I could have also tried to support him maybe in some ways.

 

I guess what I am trying to say is maybe don't try to hide it, if they don't already know. Because it might help them later in life if they end up having them as well. Just thoughts from someone who has kind of been in both shoes of this situation. 

I'm not off yet. Still tapering slowly. But I appreciate this thread. My daughter is 2. I need to learn thee lessons now so that I can help her as she deals with things as she gets older.

My kids are older now (16 and 20) but the struggle is real. The last few years of trying and failing to taper have been difficult. My youngest has been very ill since September which forced me to updose and hold so I could get through this very difficult time with him. But there are still times I feel barely functional, spend parts of many weekends in bed. So hard. Realize I will not start to actively taper again until the youngest is away at college. I don't want him to see me like that again.

This has been so tough..I have two kids, age 9 and 12, and I feel I have missed so much. I am 6 months off benzos and not doing well. I have panic very easily now and not sure what to take to cope. I keep getting prescribed SSRIs but they give me so much anxiety, that I stop after a few days.

 

Extremely hypersensitive I have become agoraphobic. Being like this with two active kids really is awful My 12 yr old knows what I am going through, I don't think my 9 year old does. My 12 yr old can tell when i am suffering and gives me hugs, its a silent thing. At first I felt guilty as I am the parent and I am the one who is supposed to comfort, but I don't now - I am proud she has turned out to be empathetic and kind.

I am having a very hard time parenting through all this. I only have one 2 1/2 year old daughter. I'm now 14.5 months off benzos and dealing with extreme anger and depression. The anger has been so bad toward my sweet 2 1/2 year old daughter that I'm now considering medications. Has anybody else dealt with anger toward their family. I feel like I can't even be in the same room with my daughter and occasionally my wife lately, I feel so angry. Like I get so blinded with rage that I can't focus or get anything done.

 

My therapist recommended beta blockers. I've done lots of research and found that Remeron might help. Not sure what to do.

I have a 14 year old and I have been very open with him about what I’m going through. I think it’s hard for him to understand how long this process of healing is (8 month taper and 6 months and still really struggling). I feel very ashamed when he comes home and asks me “what did you do today?” I’m very paranoid and self conscious about not working, although I’m up and busy all day with other tasks. I’ve always been a workaholic so I’m fearful that he is judging me, but this could also just be in my head.

 

I know my son struggles with anxiety himself so I have been open with him about talking about it and so that he knows the risks of prescription medication. I feel they are more harmful than recreational drugs. And I want him to know there are other ways to manage anxiety that don’t involve  medication... I wish I had known that and avoided this whole nightmare. Anxiety has nothing on benzo w/d.

I have a 14 year old and I have been very open with him about what I’m going through. I think it’s hard for him to understand how long this process of healing is (8 month taper and 6 months and still really struggling). I feel very ashamed when he comes home and asks me “what did you do today?” I’m very paranoid and self conscious about not working, although I’m up and busy all day with other tasks. I’ve always been a workaholic so I’m fearful that he is judging me, but this could also just be in my head.

 

I know my son struggles with anxiety himself so I have been open with him about talking about it and so that he knows the risks of prescription medication. I feel they are more harmful than recreational drugs. And I want him to know there are other ways to manage anxiety that don’t involve  medication... I wish I had known that and avoided this whole nightmare. Anxiety has nothing on benzo w/d.

 

What was your son's reaction when you told him? Did he seem to understand?

Are you able to get out of the house much? Do you have someone helping you out?

I have a 14 year old and I have been very open with him about what I’m going through. I think it’s hard for him to understand how long this process of healing is (8 month taper and 6 months and still really struggling). I feel very ashamed when he comes home and asks me “what did you do today?” I’m very paranoid and self conscious about not working, although I’m up and busy all day with other tasks. I’ve always been a workaholic so I’m fearful that he is judging me, but this could also just be in my head.

 

I know my son struggles with anxiety himself so I have been open with him about talking about it and so that he knows the risks of prescription medication. I feel they are more harmful than recreational drugs. And I want him to know there are other ways to manage anxiety that don’t involve  medication... I wish I had known that and avoided this whole nightmare. Anxiety has nothing on benzo w/d.

 

What was your son's reaction when you told him? Did he seem to understand?

Are you able to get out of the house much? Do you have someone helping you out?

 

Hey Optimist, How are you doing these days? Are you feeling any better? I was thinking about you but couldn't remember your user name to drop you a note!

 

I don't know if my son really understands. He just tells me that he loves me and gives me hugs. I try my best to hide it when I am having an extremely hard time or I call his father or my mom to come get him so he doesn't see me in a terrible state. That doesn't happen too often thankfully but I have had to call them a few times when I felt I just couldn't cope.

 

I am thankfully able to get out of the house. The agoraphobia is completely gone and the social anxiety is pretty much gone too. I think Im more nervous to have conversations with people because my life is in shambles (loss of job, etc.) so I feel like I want to avoid people so I don't have to talk about it. So its more shame of my current life than BWD I think. If you are still suffering with agoraphobia and social anxiety, then please allow my story to give you hope that it does ease and/or eventually go away. I had it so bad I wouldn't leave the house for days months ago and that is completely gone for me now.

 

My biggest help through this with my son has been my ex and my mom. They help me as much as I can I am SO THANKFUL for their support. I have many hard days, its really hard to be a single parent going through this, but I do have a support system.

 

How about you? How are you with the kids? Is your husband being supportive? Feel free to PM me anytime, I hope you have a good day today.