Harsh CT ....Trigger

I’m really scared after hearing what someone shared with me about a CT.  I’m freaking out.  Is it really possible?

 

His sister CT’d and is unable to physically walk, talk, write or move her limbs.  She’s confined to a wheelchair.  She can’t do anything for herself. 

 

Hearing this is scaring the c$&p out of me.  Is it possible to be that impaired by a CT that you can’t function at all? 

 

This has me freaking out because when I’m doing something ,like typing on my phone, I get these blank momentary gliches in my head.  Like an interruption in brain function.  It’s very hard to explain.  This just started a few days ago. 

 

I’m deeply concerned about this lapse in brain function.  I don’t know what’s happening, but I never had this before.  I’ve been battling insane head pressure, which I’m not experiencing today, however, this “gliche” or momentary blank brain is taking it’s place. 

 

I’m sooooo freaked out by what he shared with me.  I just don’t know what to do. 

 

I’m freaking out.  Is anything of what he shared with me possible? 

 

 

 

 

Did you ct?

How is you meds history and how you are feeling?

 

Everyone is different, esp. In terms of this matter of WD.

I'm still tapering but basically disabled allover ever since I started taking the drug even before tapering.

 

Many ppl are quite functional during their taper and after jumping.

 

And many don't have problems at all stopping these meds.

 

It's highly individual so please try not to scare yourself by comparing to the worst.

I’m a forced CT, by doctor

How are you feeing?

Lots of neurological symptoms head pressure, cog fog, headaches etc.

What your friends sister had is more on motor functions. You should be worry free for that.

 

I had what you have during my lexapro taper. It went away gradually after I stopped.

Lots of neurological symptoms head pressure, cog fog, headaches etc.

 

How long ago did you c/t?

TRIGGER - TRIGGER - TRIGGER

 

FIGHTING: I did a CT (polydrugged 25 years) and couldn't take care of myself. My amazing ex. did everything. I couldn't open, or close, a door. I had to eat with my hands, because I couldn't use cutlery. The only thing I could do, was chew the food. My body was as paralyzed, and all 40 symptoms on the list.

 

But now, I live alone, and not bedridden. A few days ago I was driving, and bought a lot of home decor. I still don't feel good, but I can clean if I often rest. I'm no longer worried, I know it takes time. Sometimes, I'm dancing and singing, and want to play bass tuba.

 

So we'll heal, you too!

 

I was wheelchair bound, but my muscle issues were severe enough that I couldn't really walk.  Leg paralysis and freezing, many times when my husband wasn't here to help me I had to crawl/pull myself to the bathroom.  I had been on klonopin over a decade though.  Other times my muscles would spasm/jerk violently for hours, so I was stuck in bed.

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I also feel this lapse in brain function, like the signals for brain function stop and start scares me so bad.  Like my neurotransmitters are not working properly.  It’s very hard to explain.

Hi translator,

 

I'm so heartbroken to hear your suffering!

I'm still tapering valium after a 5 5wk use at 2.5mg. My motor ability has been severely impaired with a paralyzed brain and body ever since starting valium and getting worse during taper.

 

How long did it take you to recover from this disability?

My god, hearing everyone's story really terrify me.

 

4MOM

 

me too.... terrified... and still on a ton of 2 of these poisons 

 

 

I feel like there are holes in my brain.  Like the neurons are firing in a way that is not correct.  I haven’t been able to go for a walk.  I’m not able to stay on task with anything.  It’s devastating.  No one on BB has experienced anything like this.  Something has to give. 

 

FM, no, you are wrong. Many people here have had this same feeling, including me. The problem is in DESCRIBING weird symptoms like this. I too felt I had holes in my brain and that weird feeling that things just aren't firing correctly. I realized later on that this is normal for BWD but my goodness, it just feels so horrible. You worry you will lose control and go nuts. It is THAT powerful a feeling.

 

Dolphinator, my heart goes out to you. When I began this journey I was using a walker. I could barely walk at all due to severe pain. I had fractured my femur in a fall, thanks to benzos. I almost lost my leg but a decent surgeon saved it. I will; always walk with a limp and my right ankle swell up daily due to poor circulation. I am not young. I am 69. I got this mental picture of you crawling to your bathroom, and I remember I had to do the same thing. How humiliating....and I am so sorry you are in such bad straight. I can tell you that you will heal but until that starts, you wont believe me. Please, do not give up.

east

I was wheelchair bound, but my muscle issues were severe enough that I couldn't really walk.  Leg paralysis and freezing, many times when my husband wasn't here to help me I had to crawl/pull myself to the bathroom.  I had been on klonopin over a decade though.  Other times my muscles would spasm/jerk violently for hours, so I was stuck in bed.

 

Dolpinator,

Have things improved?  Keeping you in my prayers. 

FM

I was wheelchair bound, but my muscle issues were severe enough that I couldn't really walk.  Leg paralysis and freezing, many times when my husband wasn't here to help me I had to crawl/pull myself to the bathroom.  I had been on klonopin over a decade though.  Other times my muscles would spasm/jerk violently for hours, so I was stuck in bed.

 

Sorry, that is supposed to say "wasn't" wheelchair bound. 

dolphin,

When did your muscles issues start? I am a little confused. Did this start only after you took benzos or before?

The mental image of you crawling to the bathroom breaks my heart. I have walked in those shoes and know how humiliating it is.

The thing about benzos that still horrifies me is the incredible damage they can over time. Not just your brain. Over thirty years on benzos, I slowly began to go downhill health wise. I started feeling weak, fatigued, tired all the time, depressed, more anxious, and many other things. Result? Doctor upped my benzo dose and put me on higher doses of both ADs. But that did not help a bit. It got so bad the last couple years on those drugs, I fell every single day. Sometimes more than once. I broke several bones in those falls and spent too much time having surgery and staying in a rehab to get better. I would be released and the same stupid pattern would just happen again. Since I, an RN, did not know that benzos can do this, I assumed I had some other condition. I sqw specialists, maybe 5 of them. I was told I had fibromyalgia, CFS, MS, Parkinsons and possibly a brain tumor. Good lord.,  it turned out that the only thing wrong with me was the drugs I took. Once I got off benzos and ADs, I was no longer depressed, no longer anxious, I no longer fell, I have normal energy for a 69 year old and am healthier in almost every kind of way.

I know you are struggling but please think of my story and stay on track. If there is anything I can do for you, send me a PM.

east

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Dear friends! Positive attitude and belief in recovery and strong mutual support are the basis of our future success story! Don't lose heart! As one poet said: the Dungeons will collapse and freedom will meet us joyfully at the entrance!