Am I Crazy?

I have a collection of symptoms that I now call "The Sick".  It is insidious.  It is physically debilitating.  Has any one experienced this?  It scares me so much. I am in so much pain and I feel like I am rambling. The Sick showed its ugly face several days after leaving my five-day Clonidine taper.  This is what it looks like:

 

      1.      A burning sensation that comes from my waist, up over my back and head and down my front.

 

      2.      My brain is electrified and painfully tingles.

 

      3.      Vertigo.

 

      4.      Teeth chatter.

 

      5.      Nausea.

 

      6.      Feel like my body wants to collapse into the fetal position.

 

      7.      Eyes become bloodshot and hurt.

 

      8.      My voice becomes hoarse.

 

      9.      I can't put words together.

 

Those are just the highlights.  The Sick is back and worse than ever.  I hope it passes as quickly as it came back. I feel like I am swimming through molasses.  The tingling and burning underneath my skin is so painful.  How do you get out of your own brain/body?  Why am I being punished for merely doing exactly what my doctor told me to do.

 

Has anyone had these collective symptoms?

 

 

 

 

I just want to comment on you naming the collection of symptoms.  I think that's a good approach.  They are just symptoms and they are not you, not controlling you, and they will leave when it's over.  Giving them a name puts distance between you and them and helps to separate yourself from what you're feeling.  Hang in there!

Hi,

 

You are not crazy.  What you are experiencing is "normal". After a hospital detox.  Detoxes were never designed for benzos, which require a long slow withdrawal to avoid symptoms like this.  My 2009 detox left me with symptoms, both mental and physical, that were absolutely hellish. 

 

You are newly off, and though it may take longer than you'd like, you'll eventually recover.  Right now you are in acute withdrawal when symptoms are the worst.

 

Btw, thinking one has a mental or physical illness, that it can't "just be withdrawal," is itself a common wd symptom.  It's called health anxiety or hypochondriasis.

 

Hi,

 

You are not crazy.  What you are experiencing is "normal". After a hospital detox.  Detoxes were never designed for benzos, which require a long slow withdrawal to avoid symptoms like this.  My 2009 detox left me with symptoms, both mental and physical, that were absolutely hellish. 

 

You are newly off, and though it may take longer than you'd like, you'll eventually recover.  Right now you are in acute withdrawal when symptoms are the worst.

 

Btw, thinking one has a mental or physical illness, that it can't "just be withdrawal," is itself a common wd symptom.  It's called health anxiety or hypochondriasis.

 

 

Does everyone heal from the mental symptoms?

Yes, they go away in time.  Mine lasted a bit longer than most of my physical symptoms.

 

Yes, they go away in time.  Mine lasted a bit longer than most of my physical symptoms.

 

 

Is anhedonia just a particularly stubborn symptom?

Hi! I have the same story! It's getting better now! Thank God!

I have all these symptoms and many more.  So sorry we are all suffering. 

 

SaraSue

My heart goes out to you tonight. Basically, you went CT off a fairly hefty dose of a long acting benzo. This is never advised, but it does happen. It happened to me and I lived through it. I am sorry you are going through this, and right now you wont believe me, but this DOES get better.

I had every single symptom you mention plus a lot more. For an entire year I lived in an utter state of fear and terror. I truly thought I had gone insane. I have been an RN for 36 years, and even worked in a detox unit. Never ONCE did I hear the whole truth about benzos. I was one of those nurses who thought she knew it all. WRONG! WRONG!

In 2012 I was forced by a doctor to go CT off all my drugs. Two benzos and 2 ADS. I was forced to go inpatient on a psych unit and they did not know a thing about benzos either. I had a horrible experience there and when my insurance refused to pay, I was abruptly sent home, in full blown benzo wd. I was hallucinating, for God's sake.

I know you wont believe me now, but you CAN and WILL recover from this, as long as you never take a benzo again. Your recovery may be  longer than you might hope, but in the end you will be so glad you did this.

Read my Success Story, please. It got moved to Buddie Blogs, but it still is my SS. "eastocast's trip" is its name and I just wrote in it. If you need help finding it., let me know.

I so want you to make it through this initially rough time.

east