Jump to content

38 months off. Driving for the first time!


[tr...]

Recommended Posts

I have been outdoors five times, so it felt like another planet. Driving was no problem, but being among people in the store was scary. Dizziness and weak, and the lights were very unpleasant.

Now I'm a wreck, and bedridden. A lot of pain in the body, and the eyes. But I did it!

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Thanks, you are absolutely amazing, and make me cry!

Today I woke up, dressed, on the couch. I can hardly move! I love home decor, but everything I bought is on the floor. And it was already a battlefield. So I hope, I don't get any visits.

 

Another big thank you! I LOVE YOU! :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Don't worry, the lethargy and lack of motivation about cleaning your home will go away! I had it for a very long time, and before benzos, I was a bit OCD about cleanliness. After benzos my place was a MESS. But love of having a nice place has come back, and yours will, too!  :hug:
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Wow, congrats!! Hope you start feeling better soon.

 

Driving is something I still cannot do. Some days I can drive literally 2 minutes to a grocery store (it's a walking distance, really, but caring groceries is not easy), but that's about it.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Oh Anna I'm so happy for you, you are always in my prayers. You have to keep on doing that, driving, going to stores, one day they will be natural things to do, out of habit the mind remembers how to do things, though slow is good to see some improvement and eventually you'll organise all the stuff you bought, take care dear!
Link to comment
Share on other sites

TERRY, IDEAL, COUNTING, AJUSTA AND PATRI: Thanks! :)

 

As I have written before, I had never ever taken me through these 3 years without your help. The following days, I was completely destroyed, and crying. I thought "What have I done?" Horrible. I really want to do it again, but I'm so scared. But I'll try.

 

Can you be outdoors? How do you experience this?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I have been outdoors five times, so it felt like another planet. Driving was no problem, but being among people in the store was scary. Dizziness and weak, and the lights were very unpleasant.

Now I'm a wreck, and bedridden. A lot of pain in the body, and the eyes. But I did it!

 

That was so brave, you should be proud of yourself.  I just wish you felt better now.  Love, Mary ❣️

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Mary, thanks! :)

 

I did it again, but I was so scared. Chattering teeth, and shaking hands. But I'm so bored, and after 38 months my home is a prison.

I know, I'm getting bedridden for a few days. But I say to myself: Previously, this was completely impossible. And if I can do this, then I can't complain. So I'll try to be more positive. And breathe.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Mary, thanks! :)

 

I did it again, but I was so scared. Chattering teeth, and shaking hands. But I'm so bored, and after 38 months my home is a prison.

I know, I'm getting bedridden for a few days. But I say to myself: Previously, this was completely impossible. And if I can do this, then I can't complain. So I'll try to be more positive. And breathe.

 

What a good way to think, it won't be long and it won't scare you at all, you go girl 💙🙏💎💙💎🙏

Link to comment
Share on other sites

This is a big accomplishment! Be proud of yourself. My first drive was like yours...hair raising! I kept at it and now can go most anywhere. I would suggest coupling driving with a quiet activity like going to the park or a nature preserve. That will make the drive easier and help you feel more comfortable about doing it again. I agree, shopping is difficult! The noise, crowds and choices can be too much for a delicate nervous system. If someone else can do it for you or you can find small shops that may be better.

Hold on dear Translator. It gets better. It's a very difficult recovery but in time we heal. I've come a long way but still more healing is due....it is a waiting game.

 

Warmly,

 

Carita :smitten:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Carita, thanks! :)

 

When I have done this, something happens to my face. Watering eyes, and they are so tense. Pain, and I want rip off the skin. Tension?

Link to comment
Share on other sites

The first time, I stopped breathing all the time. But the second time, it went better, because I remembered to breathe. I thought "Jesus" by the inhalation, and then "Christ". This made me calm. My dry mouth reminded me, then I had forgotten to breathe.

One moment, I forget that I felt so bad, and I ran down a hillside with grass. I'm 64 years old, and my legs were so heavy, and I couldn't stop. But I didn't kill myself!

 

So, when we are among people, we must always remember to breathe! :)

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Dear Translator,

  Yes, I think our bodies are in a near constant state of tension. No wonder we feel like jumping out of our skin. I am glad to hear you went driving again and made some time for play. Running! That is great! You forgot the challenges for a moment...evidence of healing! More times like this will come. Our task is to find the trust, acceptance and patience needed to move forward through the healing process.

  I am on a long winter hoilday in a Mexico. I'm driving, speaking the language and enjoying myself in spite of the symptoms I still carry. I could not have done this early on in recovery...I could barely think or speak clearly. This is a slow slow process. We are getting there Translator...not as quickly or easily as we would like but we are healing.

  Congratulations on your steps toward wellness!

 

  Carita :smitten:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Congrats. Excellent

Inspires us all that it can be done.

Not driven over ten miles from house for two years.

Wish me luck. M25 road trip planned.

D

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...
Keep up the good fight translator. You are one brave person and I truly believe you will make a complete recovery, just keep pressing on. 👍🏻
Link to comment
Share on other sites

×
×
  • Create New...