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4 Years Later...


[ml...]

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Hi guys,

Maybe some of you around still remember me, maybe not, but I wanted to pop in and just let those that need it know that you will heal. I can hardly believe it's been 4 years now, since my last Ativan. I remember so well thinking, there is NO WAY I can live thru this, just no way. CT was definitely not a good idea, but by the time I knew I had really screwed up, I was already too far in and there was no way I was going to get back on it. I toughed it out for the first several months/year, until I could begin to feel I could make it. I truly thought that WD would be the death of me, but here I am 4 years later! I just want to share hope and that positive push, for those that are needing it. You will make it, if you keep going forward. Just focus forward and soon it will all come to an end. We each have our day this horrific nightmare does end. Blessings!

 

:smitten:

Lysa

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Yes...I had every symptom you could imagine. My whole body & mind totally fell apart. The worst of it lasted the first year, then there were windows & waves for the next year. Year 3, I really made serious headway and year 4 was normal life again. You will get there, If I can anyone can. It was BAD.
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Thank you for sharing. I am 60% down from my Ativan taper of 2 mg daily for 10 years .  I need to hear that other people actually live through this because it is so hard
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Hi Mlmagic, it's great to hear from someone several years out. I remember when you posted your success story at two years off, but it's encouraging to hear you continued to improve over the third year. I'm two years off and much better but still get some bad waves where I'm not sure it's still benzo related. It's reassuring to know it can still get better even after all this time.
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Happy to hear you made it through this.  Did you have heart palpitations or fluttering of the heart?  Mine feels like its starting and stopping.  I went to the cardiologist on Friday and he said this is normal and its nothing serious but it sure scares the hell out of me.  I can't even exercise right now because of this. 
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[59...]

Hi guys,

Maybe some of you around still remember me, maybe not, but I wanted to pop in and just let those that need it know that you will heal. I can hardly believe it's been 4 years now, since my last Ativan. I remember so well thinking, there is NO WAY I can live thru this, just no way. CT was definitely not a good idea, but by the time I knew I had really screwed up, I was already too far in and there was no way I was going to get back on it. I toughed it out for the first several months/year, until I could begin to feel I could make it. I truly thought that WD would be the death of me, but here I am 4 years later! I just want to share hope and that positive push, for those that are needing it. You will make it, if you keep going forward. Just focus forward and soon it will all come to an end. We each have our day this horrific nightmare does end. Blessings!

 

:smitten:

Lysa

 

Wow; thanks for sharing!! I have a special respect for people who cold turkey off these drugs! I’m so happy for you.

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Dearest Lysa,

  I am so happy to see this update from you! It's wonderful to know you are fully recovered. It takes longer than we ever imagined, huh? I'm just behind you and functioning pretty well with room for more improvement. Maybe soon!

  Sending you thanks for your support and encouragement over our years together. What a time of patience, acceptance and trust!

 

Warmly,

Carita :smitten:

 

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Thanks for your message: it gives great hope!!!

As for myself, I'm starting to feel that healing will come one day. Some of my symptoms are starting to subside...

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Thanks for sharing, we all need to hear that there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I hope that one day I can share a similar post.

Best.🌸

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I had every symptom you could imagine. My whole body & mind totally fell apart.

 

Year 3, I really made serious headway and year 4 was normal life again.

 

 

 

this is what every long term sufferer needs to know! thank you :)

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Hi guys,

Maybe some of you around still remember me, maybe not, but I wanted to pop in and just let those that need it know that you will heal. I can hardly believe it's been 4 years now, since my last Ativan. I remember so well thinking, there is NO WAY I can live thru this, just no way. CT was definitely not a good idea, but by the time I knew I had really screwed up, I was already too far in and there was no way I was going to get back on it. I toughed it out for the first several months/year, until I could begin to feel I could make it. I truly thought that WD would be the death of me, but here I am 4 years later! I just want to share hope and that positive push, for those that are needing it. You will make it, if you keep going forward. Just focus forward and soon it will all come to an end. We each have our day this horrific nightmare does end. Blessings!

 

:smitten:

Lysa

 

Hi ML my old friend!

 

Im not on here much anymore and great to see you drop in. What a ride hey! I went from being an extreme case of the extreme cases and spending 2 years totally locked down to only one symptom left which is muscle pain....... not long now.

 

Great to hear from an old buddy from all those years ago.

 

Now go live your life and dont look back!

 

 

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Hi guys,

Maybe some of you around still remember me, maybe not, but I wanted to pop in and just let those that need it know that you will heal. I can hardly believe it's been 4 years now, since my last Ativan. I remember so well thinking, there is NO WAY I can live thru this, just no way. CT was definitely not a good idea, but by the time I knew I had really screwed up, I was already too far in and there was no way I was going to get back on it. I toughed it out for the first several months/year, until I could begin to feel I could make it. I truly thought that WD would be the death of me, but here I am 4 years later! I just want to share hope and that positive push, for those that are needing it. You will make it, if you keep going forward. Just focus forward and soon it will all come to an end. We each have our day this horrific nightmare does end. Blessings!

 

:smitten:

Lysa

 

Lysa,

I tried to send you a PM.  I could really use your encouragement and support.  February 26th was one year for me.  I was a short term (3 month) user of .5 Ativan.  I haven't had a lot of physical symptoms (at least nothing I've blamed on the withdrawal) but a lot of mental symptoms.  I'm WAY better than I was even just two months ago; yet I still have some mental symptoms remaining that I was hoping to talk with you about in PM.

 

Did you suffer from overthinking?  Awfulizing?  Your brain just going 200 MPH and not processing things the way it used to?  I mean, it's like the world is just "off" . . . different from how I used to perceive it, if that makes sense.

 

Also, I was prescribed Ativan for insomnia, not for anxiety.

 

I'm hoping you can articulate deeper about how you felt at the one year mark and what "symptoms" remained.  Was it still a slow progression of calmness and your brain returning to how it used to process things? Did life just feel "different" for a while?

 

 

Thank you for any insight you can provide.  I pray that even though I feel "healed" in many ways, that these remaining symptoms aren't permanent or the "new me".

 

 

 

 

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Congrats on feeling better after such a long, hard road. Do you have any desire to explain your symptoms and how they changed over time?

 

Hi,

Truthfully no, I just don’t go there anymore if you can understand. There is anxiety and PTSD involved with going back there. As I said though, I had everything to deal with that we all do here in this journey. But with all the range of physical & emotional sx, please know in time, it WILL resolve. Just keep going one day at a time.  :smitten:

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Happy to hear you made it through this.  Did you have heart palpitations or fluttering of the heart?  Mine feels like its starting and stopping.  I went to the cardiologist on Friday and he said this is normal and its nothing serious but it sure scares the hell out of me.  I can't even exercise right now because of this.

 

Yes I had the worst heart issues you could imagine. I still can hardly believe my heart made it thru it all. It was one of my worst symptoms from WD. It does go away over time.  :thumbsup:

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Dearest Lysa,

  I am so happy to see this update from you! It's wonderful to know you are fully recovered. It takes longer than we ever imagined, huh? I'm just behind you and functioning pretty well with room for more improvement. Maybe soon!

  Sending you thanks for your support and encouragement over our years together. What a time of patience, acceptance and trust!

 

Warmly,

Carita :smitten:

 

 

Blessings to you Carita! Yes here we are and your almost there! Boy is that ever the truth that I had no possible idea how long this would take. It’s better I didn’t, because if I had known it would literally take years, I’m not sure how I would have pushed thru. Taking it day by day and staying in pure hope, that anyday it will be over was best.

Blessings to you and I’m so glad to hear your ok!  :smitten:

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Hi guys,

Maybe some of you around still remember me, maybe not, but I wanted to pop in and just let those that need it know that you will heal. I can hardly believe it's been 4 years now, since my last Ativan. I remember so well thinking, there is NO WAY I can live thru this, just no way. CT was definitely not a good idea, but by the time I knew I had really screwed up, I was already too far in and there was no way I was going to get back on it. I toughed it out for the first several months/year, until I could begin to feel I could make it. I truly thought that WD would be the death of me, but here I am 4 years later! I just want to share hope and that positive push, for those that are needing it. You will make it, if you keep going forward. Just focus forward and soon it will all come to an end. We each have our day this horrific nightmare does end. Blessings!

 

:smitten:

Lysa

 

Hi ML my old friend!

 

Im not on here much anymore and great to see you drop in. What a ride hey! I went from being an extreme case of the extreme cases and spending 2 years totally locked down to only one symptom left which is muscle pain....... not long now.

 

Great to hear from an old buddy from all those years ago.

 

Now go live your life and dont look back!

 

Oh Lockie my ol Buddy! Ever so glad to hear from you! Oh how I know you suffered...I’m truly glad to hear from you and know your ok. This is indeed a long, long haul. I know your grateful that years are behind you now. Blessings for a happy & healthy life friend.  :smitten:

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Hi guys,

Maybe some of you around still remember me, maybe not, but I wanted to pop in and just let those that need it know that you will heal. I can hardly believe it's been 4 years now, since my last Ativan. I remember so well thinking, there is NO WAY I can live thru this, just no way. CT was definitely not a good idea, but by the time I knew I had really screwed up, I was already too far in and there was no way I was going to get back on it. I toughed it out for the first several months/year, until I could begin to feel I could make it. I truly thought that WD would be the death of me, but here I am 4 years later! I just want to share hope and that positive push, for those that are needing it. You will make it, if you keep going forward. Just focus forward and soon it will all come to an end. We each have our day this horrific nightmare does end. Blessings!

 

:smitten:

Lysa

 

Lysa,

I tried to send you a PM.  I could really use your encouragement and support.  February 26th was one year for me.  I was a short term (3 month) user of .5 Ativan.  I haven't had a lot of physical symptoms (at least nothing I've blamed on the withdrawal) but a lot of mental symptoms.  I'm WAY better than I was even just two months ago; yet I still have some mental symptoms remaining that I was hoping to talk with you about in PM.

 

Did you suffer from overthinking?  Awfulizing?  Your brain just going 200 MPH and not processing things the way it used to?  I mean, it's like the world is just "off" . . . different from how I used to perceive it, if that makes sense.

 

Also, I was prescribed Ativan for insomnia, not for anxiety.

 

I'm hoping you can articulate deeper about how you felt at the one year mark and what "symptoms" remained.  Was it still a slow progression of calmness and your brain returning to how it used to process things? Did life just feel "different" for a while?

 

 

Thank you for any insight you can provide.  I pray that even though I feel "healed" in many ways, that these remaining symptoms aren't permanent or the "new me".

 

Hello, I don’t do messages anymore to be honest. This is the first time I’ve even been on this board for a very long time and at 4 years, it was a reminder to leave a post giving hope to all those that are here now. This is a chapter of my life I choose to put behind me. I know your going thru such a hard time, we all do. But you will get thru it. I know it seems your situation is the worst, but it’s as we all have been thru. The advice I can give is this, do not give up your hope, the mind is a hard thing to cope with and yes, all that mental stuff I had in spades! Just KNOW that in the right time, as all our bodies heal in their own time, yours will too.

Blessings!  :smitten:

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Hi guys,

Maybe some of you around still remember me, maybe not, but I wanted to pop in and just let those that need it know that you will heal. I can hardly believe it's been 4 years now, since my last Ativan. I remember so well thinking, there is NO WAY I can live thru this, just no way. CT was definitely not a good idea, but by the time I knew I had really screwed up, I was already too far in and there was no way I was going to get back on it. I toughed it out for the first several months/year, until I could begin to feel I could make it. I truly thought that WD would be the death of me, but here I am 4 years later! I just want to share hope and that positive push, for those that are needing it. You will make it, if you keep going forward. Just focus forward and soon it will all come to an end. We each have our day this horrific nightmare does end. Blessings!

 

:smitten:

 

Lysa

 

Lysa,

I tried to send you a PM.  I could really use your encouragement and support.  February 26th was one year for me.  I was a short term (3 month) user of .5 Ativan.  I haven't had a lot of physical symptoms (at least nothing I've blamed on the withdrawal) but a lot of mental symptoms.  I'm WAY better than I was even just two months ago; yet I still have some mental symptoms remaining that I was hoping to talk with you about in PM.

 

Did you suffer from overthinking?  Awfulizing?  Your brain just going 200 MPH and not processing things the way it used to?  I mean, it's like the world is just "off" . . . different from how I used to perceive it, if that makes sense.

 

Also, I was prescribed Ativan for insomnia, not for anxiety.

 

I'm hoping you can articulate deeper about how you felt at the one year mark and what "symptoms" remained.  Was it still a slow progression of calmness and your brain returning to how it used to process things? Did life just feel "different" for a while?

 

 

Thank you for any insight you can provide.  I pray that even though I feel "healed" in many ways, that these remaining symptoms aren't permanent or the "new me".

 

Hello, I don’t do messages anymore to be honest. This is the first time I’ve even been on this board for a very long time and at 4 years, it was a reminder to leave a post giving hope to all those that are here now. This is a chapter of my life I choose to put behind me. I know your going thru such a hard time, we all do. But you will get thru it. I know it seems your situation is the worst, but it’s as we all have been thru. The advice I can give is this, do not give up your hope, the mind is a hard thing to cope with and yes, all that mental stuff I had in spades! Just KNOW that in the right time, as all our bodies heal in their own time, yours will too.

Blessings!  :smitten:

 

 

Fakeit, I relate to EVERYTHING you just wrote.  I was also a short term Ativan user, (7 months as needed, 2 months nightly). I'm further along than you are, and things have definitely gotten better... but I relate to my mind racing a 100 miles an hour, over thinking things, feeling like you're going crazy, and the world just seeming weird, or "off" as you say.  I've spoken to others who have the same exact feelings as well and they've gotten better.  So hold on, you're not insane or permanently fucked up.

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Fakeit, I relate to EVERYTHING you just wrote.  I was also a short term Ativan user, (7 months as needed, 2 months nightly). I'm further along than you are, and things have definitely gotten better... but I relate to my mind racing a 100 miles an hour, over thinking things, feeling like you're going crazy, and the world just seeming weird, or "off" as you say.  I've spoken to others who have the same exact feelings as well and they've gotten better.  So hold on, you're not insane or permanently fucked up.

 

Thank you so much! Is your signature up-to-date? Are those all the symptoms you're still dealing with?

it's so hard to explain that I can say I feel so much better yet the mind racing I didn't deal with before. it's like the horrible depersonalization and derealization finally went away but then my brain just took over and I can't seem to calm it down. It's horrible. I compare my myself to everything and everyone that I come in contact with. Everything just swims in my head. I can't make decisions easily. Ugh. I don't know if you know I'm also a type 1 diabetic. Late onset. Have had it for about ten years.

Can I am you,?

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Thank you Magic for your reply, I haven't had any breathing issues or palpitations for the past week now.  I hope they are gone for good this time, very scary.
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