Jump to content

How to adapt to your new self/lifestyle.


[Ni...]

Recommended Posts

Valiumnomore, thank you for your answer!

It looks like telling the truth could be the best thing, but I am not still sure about that. None really believes to the story of benzo wd when sympthoms take a long time. This benzo story is for me something so personal and critical that I can discuss it only on this forum and with my family.

In general I am a man who wants to tell the truth. I didn't lie or cheat in my relationships before benzo. But in this case people get scared, simply cannot understand.

 

Jaco it's not like we've killed someone. It's a disease. Pharmacologically induced. You can tell her you are recovering from the ill effects that you suffered over three years coming off a medication that you always took as prescribed but was hell to come off of. Trust me, if she really likes you and is an empathetic person, she'll want to understand. If she doesn't, she's not your girl. There are great people on YouTube explaining this hell. If she happens to want to learn once you tell her, you can send her a link of a video by neighbor Bob or anyone of your preference. If she's going to run away as soon as you tell her, you better tell her ASAP. She's not the only girl out there. And there aren't so many nice guys available.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Jaco,

 

If you're worried about oversharing but want to be honest, maybe you could just tell her that you have been in poor health for a while, and that you're doing better but want to take things slowly as you continue to recover. You can always share more details when you know her better. Good luck, and congrats on getting back out into the world!

 

Gwinna

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Jaco,

 

If you're worried about oversharing but want to be honest, maybe you could just tell her that you have been in poor health for a while, and that you're doing better but want to take things slowly as you continue to recover. You can always share more details when you know her better. Good luck, and congrats on getting back out into the world!

 

Gwinna

 

That sounds like a great idea  :thumbsup:

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Valiumnomore, thank you for your answer!

It looks like telling the truth could be the best thing, but I am not still sure about that. None really believes to the story of benzo wd when sympthoms take a long time. This benzo story is for me something so personal and critical that I can discuss it only on this forum and with my family.

In general I am a man who wants to tell the truth. I didn't lie or cheat in my relationships before benzo. But in this case people get scared, simply cannot understand.

 

Jaco it's not like we've killed someone. It's a disease. Pharmacologically induced. You can tell her you are recovering from the ill effects that you suffered over three years coming off a medication that you always took as prescribed but was hell to come off of. Trust me, if she really likes you and is an empathetic person, she'll want to understand. If she doesn't, she's not your girl. There are great people on YouTube explaining this hell. If she happens to want to learn once you tell her, you can send her a link of a video by neighbor Bob or anyone of your preference. If she's going to run away as soon as you tell her, you better tell her ASAP. She's not the only girl out there. And there aren't so many nice guys available.

 

 

Yes probably I'have still a sense of guilt, but it has not reason to exist I know... Anyway she cannot speak english so eventually I could send her only the italian version of ashton manual :) I don't know

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi Jaco,

 

If you're worried about oversharing but want to be honest, maybe you could just tell her that you have been in poor health for a while, and that you're doing better but want to take things slowly as you continue to recover. You can always share more details when you know her better. Good luck, and congrats on getting back out into the world!

 

Gwinna

 

Yes maybe I'll follow this strategy  ;D

Thanks!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Jaco hi Italiano, I'm from Spain. Ok if you're so scared to tell her then it Is going to sound like something bad. I really feel no guilt over this so I think when I tell someone I convey it as a medical malpractice. Maybe what the other buddies told you is better? Just say you're coming out of some medical condition? But then, as a woman, if a man tells me that, you bet I'd want to know what medical condition that was. It could be much worse than benzo wd. An STD for instance. Ahhhhhh I'd just go with the truth. I'd give her just a brief headline and she she doesn't look judgemental (or dumb, which is just as bad) then you can give her more info.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

As I taper down each day and my head becomes less fogged the reality check hits and I’m left with the every daunting fact that I have alienated myself these past many months to a point where my comfort level and normalcy was being sheltered and drugged away from truly living life and the outside world 🌎, how does one truly adjust to bring themselves back to that beautiful world out there when they’ve become so use to their abnormal comforts of isolation and loneliness yet secretly want to be productive and part of everyday society again? I have very little family support and don’t have the courage to just walk up and join a community group. Ughhh idk. Life was much more simpler when my brain could relax and not over stimulated over common everyday simple things, how did all you ex hermits here learn to be free again? Just curious that’s all? P.s.....one of my biggest hurdles is I’m very ashamed of what I have become and lost these past two years that I have real troubles trying to put myself back out there, I literally went from a good job with healthy relationships to being alone and not working etc....stupid scary decisions

 

I went to my local library, got a card and started visiting on a regular basis. It's a safe, low pressure place to practice minor interaction with people. I had trouble concentrating on reading for awhile, so what I did was check out some adolescent books I enjoyed during middle school, until I could read adult books again.

 

What I also did that changed my life during my taper was start cardio kickboxing classes. I found a very welcoming, supportive studio that let me start out quietly in the back; no pressure. It's been my exposure therapy for the past 3 years. It's helped me mentally, physically, socially... I highly recommend exploring something you are or can be passionate about. Start small!

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I’m mourning the old me and the person i once was and the active and vibrant social life I once had.

 

 

But I am confident I will get it back, and yes it probably won’t be the same as my “old life” but who knows?

 

 

Maybe it will be better!

 

 

I think we will all be so much more self aware after this, we won’t take good mental and physical health for granted, we will have had time to reflect on who our true friends are, what we want out of the relationships in our lives and we’ll be stronger than ever. 

 

 

If we can conquer this, we can conquer anything!

 

 

^ This ...exactly. The silver lining.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Create an account or sign in to comment

You need to be a member in order to leave a comment

Create an account

Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!

Register a new account

Sign in

Already have an account? Sign in here.

Sign In Now
×
×
  • Create New...