Do you think being Alone too much affects your brain?

Hey guys. I live alone. Don’t really go outside much only when I have my boys but besides that no support from friends or family. Do you think alienating myself in the house these past two years just eating Ativan has an effect physically on your mind and body? I seem to have ok days whenever my oldest boy is around and we laugh n hang out then when he goes back to his mothers house the feelings of alone start. Just venting and curious to see if there are any other loners in this world like myself? Lol.

Hey guys. I live alone. Don’t really go outside much only when I have my boys but besides that no support from friends or family. Do you think alienating myself in the house these past two years just eating Ativan has an effect physically on your mind and body? I seem to have ok days whenever my oldest boy is around and we laugh n hang out then when he goes back to his mothers house the feelings of alone start. Just venting and curious to see if there are any other loners in this world like myself? Lol.

Yes, for sure... I have read of something called a "herd" chemical, allong the same lines as endorphins...  Sadly its often not so simple as just get out into life and all will be well.. At times it just may not be possible, or even better for healing... But a gentle push in that direction when oppertunities present can only be a good thing... There was a good point in my taper where it became so much easier naturally, so I dont think its all in our head...

My problem is that its been so long that there is no social left, so everything is new, and that takes energy I just dont have atm... Which is my problem for this coming weekend, and its getting to me...

 

Just do the best you can...

 

 

 

I’m so glad I found your post!  I’ve been worrying so much about this very thing, myself.  I often, unintentionally, work myself up into a panic about it because I’m alone most of the time and on,y have my husband for in person support and interaction.  Unless I’m having some easier days (partial windows) where I force myself out and interact with people at checkout or appts.  I worry that without the human connection element, I may not heal.  So, Nick...  you are not alone in this.  I asked my therapist if loneliness will kill me and she said we, as humans, can undergo a lot of suffering and it won’t kill us or harm our recovery.  That when the time comes, it will be more suitable to get out into the world and rebuild life and socializing. 

 

Cant, it’s so comforting to read that it’s nit so easy as to just force yourself out there and all will be better.  You’re right that at times it’s not possible or better for healing.  I’ve forced beyond my limits, at times, and it’s had a set back effect.  You’re not alone, either, buddy!  “No social left”, yep...  everything is new and takes energy we may or may not have.  This is my problem going into each week, when the weekend is over and my husband goes back to work and the gym on weekdays.  I like your idea of the gentle push if there is an opening for an opportunity.  That’s so hopeful that there was a point you got to where it was naturally easier and not so much a force thing.  Do you recall when it was? 

 

I live in an area where I know no one, other than the hubs.  So, very socially isolating.  And is a pretty consistent concern for me, too.  Prior to this, I’ve been a social butterfly and have had lots of friends and family and people around me...  my whole life.  Things changed pretty much overnight.  Still blows my mind.  But, it’s not like I can really relate much with anyone not going through this, right now. Fellow benzo warriors feel safest.  Hope to be naturally expansive in the social realm again someday. 

 

Big hugs you guys

 

Uni ❤️

 

 

 

 

I feel really isolated too, but I think even just small engagements make a difference. Like I usually have a few sentences of small talk with the cashier at the grocery store, and if I have nothing to say, I'll just talk about the weather.  I sometimes fantasize about getting to know my neighbors, but then I sometimes get really paranoid and think they are all mean and evil.  LOL.

 

Unicorn, I'm like you, other than my family that I live with, I don't know anybody where we live now.  I also was much more social before.  I actually used to love having people over and entertaining. 

Hi Guys...

 

Yes Uni, It was a year ago, when I slowed my taper right down to get as good as I could (within reason) pre stepping off Valium... And other times I havnt felt too bad... For me there is a direct relation to my SX...

Its Just Me and C16.. -and the cost to him has been huge... -My biggest regret.. Apart from L20, my other son, -thats it now..

I had just moved here from 6hrs away prior to my accident, and my friends were all my partners at the time of the accident, and they were all "high flyers" for want of a better word... -Local politics and bussiness, due to the nature of her work.. So not realy my scene at all.. Most of my life was very remote living, so not much in the way of social that has a continuum... It realy is starting from scratch, -step by step... I do think the worry, while very real, is much enhanced by these meds.. -Benzo lies, if you will...

 

 

 

 

 

Hey everyone, yeah being alone in general sucks but going through Benzo tapering and WD alone is even worse. To make matters worse I am forced to go back to work very soon so that won’t help my anxiety but least I’ll be forced out of my house daily. Gotta think positive. God bless.

Hey everyone, yeah being alone in general sucks but going through Benzo tapering and WD alone is even worse. To make matters worse I am forced to go back to work very soon so that won’t help my anxiety but least I’ll be forced out of my house daily. Gotta think positive. God bless.

Hey Nick..

Will work be more social..??

Do you live in a city or town so its possible to start a hobby or join a social type group..?

I live too far out of town for it to be viable atm.. Energy levels are a big factor, -and the seemingly inability to start anything while feeling like this... Right now im just trying to put the pieces in place, to be ready for when I do pick up again... Sadly even my "work" is at home in the bush...

 

Trust is another issue for me.. It seems that most people that want to interact have an agender... I get sick of waiting for the "can I, would you, could you"...

 

I hope returning to work is a good thing for you, and it all goes smooth..

 

Yes it affects your mind and body. You go insane and see how pointless and hopeless life is. Be thankful if you live with someone.

I definitely have spent too much time alone during my taper - I can't face big social situations (and I was very social before this) and isolate way too much. It's a struggle but I am fighting it and making myself go out and be around people more and more.

Yes, I have been mainly housebound for 22 years due to illness. It is horrible.

 

There is loads of research showing links between isolation, loneliness and both mental and physical ill health.

I noticed that I became a little bit uhm... "weird" while tapering (I tapered over 5 years and looking back hell was I weird). I made a list called "what do I need to become a normal human again". Make friends and social contacts. That was a point on that list.

 

I had a dog these days and started to go out when others would be in the fields. I really kind of stalked them:-) in order to get a little chat with strangers. In the end I found a good friend I still have. Later I made friends with a lady to whom I went to get massages. Just asked her to go out for a coffee. Really crazy. But she is still my friend 7 years later:-)

 

Start with little chats to get to know people. No talking about problems, just the weather or a topic thats not leading to any problem you have. Or - if you do not like to talk - be there, where others are. A cafe or a bistro, where you see the same people every day and just say hello.

 

Our brain likes to spiral around our problems. Others can EASILY wake us up again, make our world bigger and show us that we can be loved no matter whats wrong with us. It may be hard first, but its like with any other new habit, it has to be trained. but its worth it.

Hey guys. I live alone. Don’t really go outside much only when I have my boys but besides that no support from friends or family. Do you think alienating myself in the house these past two years just eating Ativan has an effect physically on your mind and body? I seem to have ok days whenever my oldest boy is around and we laugh n hang out then when he goes back to his mothers house the feelings of alone start. Just venting and curious to see if there are any other loners in this world like myself? Lol.

Yes, for sure... I have read of something called a "herd" chemical, allong the same lines as endorphins...  Sadly its often not so simple as just get out into life and all will be well.. At times it just may not be possible, or even better for healing... But a gentle push in that direction when oppertunities present can only be a good thing... There was a good point in my taper where it became so much easier naturally, so I dont think its all in our head...

My problem is that its been so long that there is no social left, so everything is new, and that takes energy I just dont have atm... Which is my problem for this coming weekend, and its getting to me...

 

Just do the best you can...

 

The herd chemical makes a lot of sense! We are animals that were made to live in small family units, the industrial revolution threw a lot of that off, and the 'normal' lifestyle (being alone), isnt really very good for us IMO, we're made to connect with others or at least live in a small 'tribe'

its also super hard to be sociable when trying to get off these meds too