Starting fresh

The first day of 2019 seems like a good day to post here. (Where I live in the US, it’s still Jan 1 ...) I didn’t want to do it sooner for fear of “jinxing” my good fortune in being able to step off of my taper.

 

44 days ago, (but who’s counting, lol...), I finished my 17 month taper.  I made it through this holiday season without Xanax - the first set of holidays in over 20 years with no benzos!

 

I’d be lying if I said that I didn’t want to take one or two along the way - there was plenty of stress and many moments where I was so tempted to take “just one” to “take the edge off” ...

 

But I didn’t.

And I survived.

And I enjoyed most of the holiday experience.

 

I am noticing subtle things - like my memory is better than it was ... and I’m happier than I used to be - though I hadn’t noticed that I wasn’t happy before....  Food tastes better, (which is having the effect of a few added pounds, lol), and I’m not isolating myself as much as I was before.  I think I’ve always been an optimist, but it’s easier to be positive about things when the sun is shining a little brighter - and it does seem to be doing that these days!

 

I had a smooth taper, not symptom-free, but slow, steady and smoother than many who find themselves here.  There were many adjustments along the way, as symptoms (and life) happened, but the taper continued.

 

Today, as I’m looking towards the new calendar year, I am grateful for the advice and support that I received here in 2017 & 2018.  Frankly, I didn’t think I’d be one to actually succeed in stopping my Xanax - but I’m acutely aware that this moment would not have been possible without the support that I found here. 

 

Wishing you all success and good health in this new year.

Wishing you the absolute best. Congratulations in how far you’ve come! That is incredible. So thrilled for what this new year will bring for you. ❤️

Wishing you the absolute best. Congratulations in how far you’ve come! That is incredible. So thrilled for what this new year will bring for you. ❤️

 

Thank you, Indigofirst

Fantastic, JannaBean!! 

Wishing you all the best healing moving forward!

Fantastic, JannaBean!! 

Wishing you all the best healing moving forward!

 

Thanks, SS!

Congratulations JanaBean, you are benzo free and the only person I ever saw Jim Hawk give a heartfelt compliment too . I am very happy for you and wish you a wonderful life a head.  Love you, Mary ☮️💜🙏

Congratulations JanaBean, you are benzo free and the only person I ever saw Jim Hawk give a heartfelt compliment too . I am very happy for you and wish you a wonderful life a head.  Love you, Mary ☮️💜🙏

 

Awww... MARY!

ginormous hugs!!

Good job better days are coming.

Congratulations JanaBean, you are benzo free and the only person I ever saw Jim Hawk give a heartfelt compliment too . I am very happy for you and wish you a wonderful life a head.  Love you, Mary ☮️💜🙏

 

Awww... MARY!

ginormous hugs!!

 

:smitten:

Janna this is great news!  I totally know what you mean about tasting food again.  I am two months off now and I am enjoying tastes and food so much. 

Congrats!  I've been off xanax for 9 days now (but who's counting).  As I sit here struggling with symptoms, I truly am thankful for your success story.  It's promising to know there's light at the end of this tunnel.  Thanks for sharing!

Congrats!  I've been off xanax for 9 days now (but who's counting).  As I sit here struggling with symptoms, I truly am thankful for your success story.  It's promising to know there's light at the end of this tunnel.  Thanks for sharing!

 

Congratulations to you too sunshine, hope your sxs ease soon!  Mary ☮️💜🙏