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Took about three years, but I finally made it out the other side


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Hello everyone,

 

As 2018 winds down I was looking back on what a good year it has been for me.  Since 2015 I would pray every new years eve "please let this be the year I get clear of withdrawals".  Honestly, I don't even think about withdrawals now.  I feel as good, if not better, than I did pre-benzo all the time now. 

 

I started out taking xanax for a couple of months in 2015.  I did shift work and my sleep schedule would fluctuate.  Benzos helped with that, until they didn't.  I started getting terrible insomnia and figured the xanax was to blame, so I threw what I had left away and didn't get another prescription.  That was when all hell broke loose.  Muscle tightness, maybe an hour or two of sleep a night, nerve pain, etc...  I actually went to the ER because I thought I had a UTI or kidney stone from having to urinate all the time.  They found nothing medically wrong.  I stumbled across benzo buddies and it was a lifesaver.  It made sense what I was going through when I saw others with similar symptoms. 

 

After reading ALOT of posts I though, "ok, others have suffered and recovered, you'll be fine in a month or two".  My train of thought was that I'd only been taking xanax for a short time so my recovery was sure to be quick.  Wrong!  I did get my first short window after about three months and the insomnia let up somewhat, but the nerve pain and muscle tightness stayed with me for most of the first year.  The second year I got more Windows but still got hit with waves.  My third year my symptoms had mostly let up but I would occasionally get hit with slight waves.  I'm happy to report the last eight months have been symptom free. I rarely posted during this time but read success stories daily. 

 

This experience has changed me and I think it's been mostly for the better.  I'm more grateful for things now.  Little things don't get me stressed like they used to (mostly).  I started running after the first year.  It hurt like hell for awhile physically but helped me so much mentally.  I've now entered and finished several 5Ks which is something I would've never done before.  Don't get me wrong, benzo withdrawal was brutal and I would never want to experience it again. But there were some positives that came out of it. 

 

In closing, I was a short term user that suffered multiple withdrawal symptoms (more than I've listed here).  It took some time but I came out the other side better than I started. For those of you suffering, please hang in there and know it will get better.  Thanks benzo buddies, you were an absolute beacon of hope for me. 

 

Dave

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Congratulations! I hope 2019 holds much joy and happiness for you! Glad you are now a success story that others can gain hope and inspiratio  from!

Fp

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A huge congratulations to you Hopeful30 for making it to the other side. I am so very happy for you.

Also, a sincere thank you to you for taking time to write your success story. Gives me hope and those of who are still struggling that we will also heal and regain our normal life back.

 

May your new life continue to be blessed with love, joy and peace.

 

Happy New Year!

 

Pi

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Such a positive story! Love hearing you made it to the other side in a better way even, although it took you quite a while.

Way to go!

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Congrats!! What a way to finish off the year and start fresh by posting your success story.

 

Out of curiousity, did you experience odd head sensations like pressure or just feeling lightheaded/dizzy and depersonalized? I'm nearly a year off and these are the constant lingering things for me.  Seeing your story reminds me to be patient, but it's so hard at times to keep pushing forward day after day.

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Thank you for the well wishes, they are much appreciated! 

 

As far as head sensations I was very fortunate that I didn't have many physical symptoms from the neck up.  Some tinnitus in the beginning but most of my physical symptoms seemed to be around my core.  I got occasionally light headed but only occasionally.  I did have depersonalization for awhile though.  It was hard to find joy in things I used to love.  I faked it alot around my family for most of that first year.  The good news is I now enjoy most activities more than I did pre-benzo.  Having lost that ability for awhile has made me cherish it much more now that it's back.  Hope this helps.

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  • 4 weeks later...

Hopeful 30,

 

Congrats on coming out on the other side.  You suffered too long for such a short period use but that's how Benzos work I guess. Thanks for sharing.

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What an inspiration! Congratulations! I'm happy you are well.  Live fully dear Dave!

 

Carita :smitten:

 

Thanks so much!  It took awhile, but I'm starting to feel like I can live life to its fullest potential. 

Hopeful 30,

 

Congrats on coming out on the other side.  You suffered too long for such a short period use but that's how Benzos work I guess. Thanks for sharing.

 

Yeah, there doesn't seem to be much rhyme or reason to the process.  Some recover much faster than others.  Turns out I'm definitely an "others". 

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