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So not used to depression


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Anxiety has been my worst symptom (of course DP and DR, physical stuff, memory and hearing impairments and on and on with other stuff), but so incredibly painful, at least it was sort of stimulating, but now severe depression is in the picture. and it scares me. I feel like I'm walking through waist-high water at times. I'm not sure how to proceed or how to distract. It's so truly hard to "keep the faith" after almost 2 years of intense suffering. I go through my days, at times, just blindly going forward -- sometimes wishing to be dead, but remembering the people I would hurt if I did something drastic.  I'm glad I keep a journal so I can look back amazingly at times where I have actually had a possible window or at least tiny glimpses into what I call "joy" because when depression lifts even from its constant mild form I can feel such a relief, it's truly sort of wonderful..

 

I know I've been rambling, but I appreciate being able to share my intense pain right now.

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I've been depressed on and off for my entire adult life, it's the worst. I try forcing myself to take opportunities that come my way, because if i don't i wouldn't do anything!  :(
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Anxiety has been my worst symptom (of course DP and DR, physical stuff, memory and hearing impairments and on and on with other stuff), but so incredibly painful, at least it was sort of stimulating, but now severe depression is in the picture. and it scares me. I feel like I'm walking through waist-high water at times.

 

Dear mowgli, you describe it so well... I've been experiencing similar cycles for a long time. I don't have any advice - except to hang in there. These symptoms are so typical of everyone who came through in the end. You're not alone, mowgli. We'll get to the other side together. So sorry you're going through this. Sending love and healing light.

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I have depression, gad with agoraphobia, ptsd and bipolar. I've realized I will most likely never be fully drug free and I'm okay with that. Most people in my family are on an AD too. Mother has depression, dad was bipolar but self medicated with alcohol until it killed him, Sister is bipolar and on 2 ADs, brother is the only one who escaped !

Lots of aunts and uncles and cousins who also have a mental illness.

Its not easy, I know, but I have found a counselor is the best option if you dont want to go a medicine route.

Maybe one who does CBT or EMDR? At the very least someone to vent to is VERY helpful, crisis lines are a joke :\

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Anxiety has been my worst symptom (of course DP and DR, physical stuff, memory and hearing impairments and on and on with other stuff), but so incredibly painful, at least it was sort of stimulating, but now severe depression is in the picture. and it scares me. I feel like I'm walking through waist-high water at times.

 

Dear mowgli, you describe it so well... I've been experiencing similar cycles for a long time. I don't have any advice - except to hang in there. These symptoms are so typical of everyone who came through in the end. You're not alone, mowgli. We'll get to the other side together. So sorry you're going through this. Sending love and healing light.

 

Rubylove,

 

Sending love and healing light back to you.  Yes, we'll get to the other side together.

 

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I have depression, gad with agoraphobia, ptsd and bipolar. I've realized I will most likely never be fully drug free and I'm okay with that. Most people in my family are on an AD too. Mother has depression, dad was bipolar but self medicated with alcohol until it killed him, Sister is bipolar and on 2 ADs, brother is the only one who escaped !

Lots of aunts and uncles and cousins who also have a mental illness.

Its not easy, I know, but I have found a counselor is the best option if you dont want to go a medicine route.

Maybe one who does CBT or EMDR? At the very least someone to vent to is VERY helpful, crisis lines are a joke :\

 

Byrjun,

 

Thank you for sharing. I do have a counselor and she is a tremendous support and she does CBT. I also lost a relative to alcohol. A brother. Keep the faith.

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I've been depressed on and off for my entire adult life, it's the worst. I try forcing myself to take opportunities that come my way, because if i don't i wouldn't do anything!  :(

 

atekloppin,

 

Such good advice. Thank you.

 

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I have depression, gad with agoraphobia, ptsd and bipolar. I've realized I will most likely never be fully drug free and I'm okay with that. Most people in my family are on an AD too. Mother has depression, dad was bipolar but self medicated with alcohol until it killed him, Sister is bipolar and on 2 ADs, brother is the only one who escaped !

Lots of aunts and uncles and cousins who also have a mental illness.

Its not easy, I know, but I have found a counselor is the best option if you dont want to go a medicine route.

Maybe one who does CBT or EMDR? At the very least someone to vent to is VERY helpful, crisis lines are a joke :\

 

Byrjun,

 

Thank you for sharing. I do have a counselor and she is a tremendous support and she does CBT. I also lost a relative to alcohol. A brother. Keep the faith.

 

:hug:

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