1 year off

It's crazy to think I've been a year off today. A  year gone just like that. After 2 weeks off I thought I was one of the lucky ones, I was feeling good. How wrong I was, for anyone who say my posts over some, I was in a desperate state. I was bedridden almost completely disconnected to reality, I lost track of time and days, couldn't swallow without choking. I couldn't feel my body my DP,DR and numbness was so bad, I couldn't fully control my limbs, I lost 2 stone and was dangerously skinny. That lasted around 4 months. It turns out I had an overactive thyroid, I started treating that around September and the depression eased a bit.

 

I have settled into a somewhat waves/windows type pattern. Obviously its hard feeling bad after the good days but it gives me hope, and after the summer I had, that's all I can ask for. I am never completly free of symptoms, but on good days I feel like a normal person only with some fatigue, dizzyness and a little lack of emotions. I got a flight to see my Girlfriend in liverpool, which was unthinkable a few months back, so I am grateful for that improvement. There is a long way to go yet, on the bad days I still feel like I'll never fully heal but on the good days I start ambitiously planning things and have had a few job interviews which weren't successful but went well all things considered, so it's a mixed bag. In the summer I thought I was gonna be severely depressed forever those 4 months felt like decades, but it has eased quite a bit since then. I hope that, that can give some people struggling hope. If you feel like you can't relate, read back over my posts, I really was on the edge.

Congrats my friend.  What a ride you have been on. This whole withdrawal thing that we are all dealing with is just incredible.  The symptoms will continue to lighten for you.  Congrats on the 1 year mark.  Keep the faith!

Wow! Nate you do not know how happy I am that you are doing better. Your posts use to just break my heart. I am so happy you got that thyroid checked out because it can mimic a lot of benzo WD symptoms. Congratulations my friend and I will continue to pray for you!! I am so so happy right now :thumbsup:

I am so pleased you are doing so much better than you were and I hope that things will continue to improve for you over the coming months.  Take care.

 

Fiona 

Wow, gooner_nate! I am so happy for you! I remember how much you suffered this summer.