Author Topic: Describe your anxiety  (Read 5684 times)

[Buddie]

Describe your anxiety
« on: June 28, 2010, 03:06:31 pm »
I figured I would like to compare notes, because , my counselor keeps telling me I have to find the root of my anxiety . And I keep telling her that when makes me anxious are the symptoms that I experienced. For example, I just went for a long walk , by the river , is hot as hell here but nice and breezy. As I live my house I get this sensation of light head , like eyes are not focus , like a vague feeling of discomfort , I can't truly enjoy the walk because I feel like this ? Is this anxiety ? I seem not to be able to relax and just go with the flow. I listen to music , stretch , watch the different boats , but I am not enjoying it . This was the first symptom I ever had 2 and half years ago  after start using BP meds,I am only taking one now. Then for example at work , I get this rush on the head like is kind of an overwhelming feeling , that I have to do so many things and do them right, I never pass out or have panic or any other panic symptom. When I go out I also feel uncomfortable ,the noise, the people moving too fast ,the cars , and so on . So is this how anxiety feels to others, or am I just kind of anxious but not extremely anxious. How you cope if it is this way for you or if it is the drug w/d's just enhancing whatever is under . I have been asking my counselor for tools to combat my anxiety and she tells me that I have them all, positive thinking , relaxation, deep breathing techniques ,meditation , done them all . Any stories to share?
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Describe your anxiety
« Reply #1 on: June 28, 2010, 03:55:51 pm »
[...], I can relate to the lightheadedness and eyes not wanting to focus, and not being able to enjoy a walk as all I can think about is how awful I feel.  My anxiety feels like I'm going to jump out of my skin, my heart beats fast and I just feel like I'm on the edge of panic but don't get a real panic attack (probably cuz I'm still on almost 1 mg. Klon).  I also feel nauseous much of the time and who can have an appetite when they feel in fight-or-flight mode all the time?   There are moments when I think I can't stand the way I feel for one more minute.

I, too, have all the tools, but they just don't seem to work well during benzo withdrawal.  I think sometimes all we can do is endure.  Does your counselor realize that benzo withdrawal CAUSES anxiety?  I just find it interesting that he/she wants you to find the root of it when, in fact, whatever underlying anxiety you have (and I have plenty and have my whole life) is just made much worse by the benzos.  Does he/she think this is just your underlying stuff?  I feel much worse now than I felt when I was prescribed Klon back in 2004.  Were you put on yours for anxiety?  If so, then I think anxiety is going to be your worst sx coming off.  Best to you, [...], ~~[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Describe your anxiety
« Reply #2 on: June 28, 2010, 04:12:52 pm »
Thanks for the reply [...]
I was put on it because of  a panic attack or so I though it was ,it happened the first week that I went on BP medication and also because I was stressed out at work and need a way to relax while there. Was this anxiety I asked myself or just a very stressful situation I had created in my mind?
I by no means come close to what you feel , I don't feel that extreme, I just feel terrible uncomfortable and tense, but never like I am going to pass out or panicky . That is all gone now. I think at the beginning of this benzo ride I felt like that since I was not upping the dose and I was withdrawing every day , so the feeling of the w/d's was making me anxious and irritable. Is all better now. My counselor  I think does not get the scope of what the w/d s do , so the last session I went trough it while withdrawing and she witness it . She is  very familiar with narcotics addicts and prescriptions dependancy , but again I will insist on more feedback and tools to work with the anxiety , I think I already told her the root of what caused it, my fear of getting sick and my experience with loved ones that battle different ailments  and me being  there taking care of them. So now, I think she has to make a decision on which course to take or pretty much think I am wasting my money. She has helped me with the depression I was feeling about a month or so ago, that deep depression is gone now. Wether she knows or not that benzo w/d causes more anxiety  ( I think she gets the picture now). She wants my focus on other things rather than on this taper, but I think this is the key element towards my recovery. She should be aware of it. She did tell me to go slow. :crazy:
« Last Edit: June 28, 2010, 04:34:57 pm by [Buddie] »
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Describe your anxiety
« Reply #3 on: June 28, 2010, 04:21:13 pm »
Yes, [...], my therapist wants me to concentrate on things other than my taper, too, but I don't know how I can do that given the way I feel.  I did just make a 12-day trip to meet my new grandson, so I guess you could say I'm "getting on with my life" in spite of withdrawal.  But, I felt pretty lousy the whole time and was focused on that (along with my beautiful little boy) so it's hard to feel much progress there.

I'm so glad your counselor helped with your depression.  I'm curious about how she did that.  I can't seem to shake mine right now no matter what my therapist does/says and no matter how much I try to distract.  Best, ~~[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Describe your anxiety
« Reply #4 on: June 28, 2010, 04:44:21 pm »
I don't know exactly how it lifted , I was having pretty dark thoughts , but it did. I did not take the antidepressant that they put me on , I hated it , Wellbutrim , because it made me feel like you describe on how you feel about your anxiety . So I tried it for a week and that was it. NO more.
She did  a lot of talking and she made journal about what was positive about myself. I think the biggest component to the depressive thoughts was the end of my 12 year relationship in the most emotionally wrenching and exhausting way , so I think I really had a valid reason to be depressed, add to that the benzo and BP depression( chemical) and I  must be a pretty tough cookie to still be here, so I pad myself in the back. I tell you what lift me the most is the desire to be free of this med, and the promise to have a better life free of this and to recover some of who I was and move forward. There is still a lot of territory to cover and I am by no means emotionally healed, but time will tell. For now focusing my attention on my best friend( me) is the best thing I can do . I feel for you and I hope you can find a spark inside you that will return your happiness . We are creatures of the Universe and we have a right to be happy! ( I think I borrow this one from an old poem) :D
« Last Edit: June 28, 2010, 06:58:28 pm by [Buddie] »
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Describe your anxiety
« Reply #5 on: June 28, 2010, 04:52:49 pm »
I don't know exactly how it lifted , I was having pretty dark thoughts , but it did. I did not take the antidepressant that they put me on , I hated it , Wellbutrim , because it made me feel like you describe on how you feel about your anxiety . So I tried it for a week and that was it. NO more.
She did  a lot of taking and she made journal about what was positive about myself. I think the biggest component to the depressive thoughts was the end of my 12 year relationship in the most emotionally wrenching and exhausting way , so I think I really had a valid reason to be depressed, add to that the benzo and BP depression( chemical) and I  must be a pretty tough cookie to still be here, so I pad myself in the back. I tell you what lift me the most is the desire to be free of this med, and the promise to have a better life free of this and to recover some of who I was and move forward. There is still a lot of territory to cover and I am by no means emotionally healed, but time will tell. For now focusing my attention on my best friend( me) is the best thing I can do . I feel for you and I hope you can find a spark inside you that will return your happiness . We are creatures of the Universe and we have a right to be happy! ( I think I borrow this one from an old poem) :D

[...], I'm so glad you're feeling somewhat better emotionally.  Yes, the end of a long-term relationship can sure throw you into the depths, for sure.  The chemical part just has to wait till we're off the meds.  Fingers crossed for both of us that we will heal quickly once that happens.  L., ~~[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Describe your anxiety
« Reply #6 on: June 28, 2010, 11:02:29 pm »
fantastic thread [...] I need to think before I can contribute.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Describe your anxiety
« Reply #7 on: June 29, 2010, 04:07:39 am »
Some days my taper makes me feel so bad I can barely go.Panic is not as bad but everything in my body seems to be fighting against me.Tingling feelings ,heart  racing and dizzy.Just a mess.But I catch a break here and their, god if not I feel I might just lose it. I get weak moments also when I think if this keeps up I am giving up and going back to my xanax but almost two weeks and not turning back now.
If it was not so hot here I would get out and walk.But I work on Paint Shop Pro projects and spend time with my daughter and pets, anything is better than thinking  about it all the time. I have noticed I feel so sleepy now more than ever.Also losing lots of weight to much. Everyone I know that sees me asks me if I am sick.But I have a hyper thyroid in the mix of all this mess not a good thing.So your not alone.
« Last Edit: July 01, 2010, 02:41:35 am by [Buddie] »
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Describe your anxiety
« Reply #8 on: July 06, 2010, 06:00:58 pm »
my counselor keeps telling me I have to find the root of my anxiety

One of the problems I've encountered with anxiety is that it seems to take form in many different ways. This makes finding the root very difficult (like a needle in a haystack). Has anyone been able to find the exact source of their anxiety and fix it?   

I have been searching for an anxiety cure my entire life. Talked to several psychologist, was a psych major in college, and have read many books on the subject. Still I don't have a clue how to 'fix' it. I'm starting to accept that it may just be part of who I am. If I can somehow learn to live with it and manage it maybe it wont be as bad...

Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Describe your anxiety
« Reply #9 on: July 07, 2010, 02:45:44 am »
Jamie I wish someone would give me the answer to that ? also. Is  this part of who we are? Or did something somewhere trigger it?
It my case I think abuse from a spouse caused mine and other things along the years.. But it just showed up one day out of the blue and lead me to a land I never wanted to see benzos. Some say it can be heredity from our families. Who knows but I would like to know how to beat it. I do everything to try. Breath, think happy thoughts, walk and dance you name but some days It just shows up kinds like a unwanted visitor. I stopped researching it. I felt like I was a dog just chasing its tail, so many tells, so many diffrent stories who knows what the real facts are.
My one doctor even told me to stop reading stuff on the net. He sound kinda pissed when I told him about researching benzo withdrawals and needing help to get off them.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.