Author Topic: KROCK....The Sucess Story I never wrote......  (Read 13988 times)

[Buddie]

Re: KROCK....The Sucess Story I never wrote......
« Reply #100 on: April 18, 2019, 05:35:19 am »
thank you, I needed to hear this. If you can go cold turkey like that, I can do this taper. thank you a million times for not forgetting about your community and sharing your success. I look forward to being in your position one day, and being able to help others see that there is a chance at the other side of this.

Im happy to help! You will be in my position sooner than you think. Promise.

Please know you have what it takes to make it through your taper. Your WAY stronger than you think. You will surprise yourself on what you can handle and endure.... You got this! Stay the course....you have the inner strength to prevail.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: KROCK....The Sucess Story I never wrote......
« Reply #101 on: April 18, 2019, 07:04:07 am »
Thank you for being back.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: KROCK....The Sucess Story I never wrote......
« Reply #102 on: April 18, 2019, 11:18:27 am »
Thanks [...] for the inspo. Sorry you suffered so much but so glad to hear youre better :)

How long were you on benzos before your first CT?
Im in similar position, was CT, put back on 6 weeks later but not helped and now feel worse than I did when I quit them. Wish Id listened on here not to docs  and stayed off.
Doc wants to CT again as Im suffering so much on them, theyre making me sicker..
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: KROCK....The Sucess Story I never wrote......
« Reply #103 on: April 18, 2019, 03:46:01 pm »
You're heroes! I learn from you!
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: KROCK....The Sucess Story I never wrote......
« Reply #104 on: April 19, 2019, 12:21:58 am »
Thanks [...] for the inspo. Sorry you suffered so much but so glad to hear youre better :)

How long were you on benzos before your first CT?
Im in similar position, was CT, put back on 6 weeks later but not helped and now feel worse than I did when I quit them. Wish Id listened on here not to docs  and stayed off.
Doc wants to CT again as Im suffering so much on them, theyre making me sicker..

So i was on Valium for a few years before I went CT at a Detox Center. I tried to taper down and had no idea what the fuck I was doing. As I'm sure that happens with many. The withdrawl symptoms would kick in and I would dose back up out of fear and the CRAZY symptoms.

Long story short I checked myself into a high dollar rehab center in California. Major mistake!! All hell broke loose there. Loaded me up on a ton of seizure meds and ripped me off the Valium. I was still on 20 to 30mgs a day when that happened. The withdrawl ravaged my body and mind. I tried to reinstate due to the UNREAL pain and suffering. I cant explain to you how bad i was. So dam bad!!

 Anyways the reinstatement didn't work. I was to fucked up...pardon my language. I kept taking more Valium each day [...] i would go back to being normal and relaxed again. Unfortunately...that never came. I got sicker and sicker during the reinstatement. My doc was extremely worried about my health and safety. He never saw full blown benzo withdrawl like i had. I was then faced with a rapid taper off my failed reinstatement of 20mgs of Valium. That's was SUPER brutal because i was still in really bad shape from the CT at the Detox Center.

During my failed reinstatement....my doc put me on Phenobarbital to try and ease some of my withdrawl symptoms. Dont EVER take that shit.....it totally fucked me up beyond description. I then had to taper off of the Pheno. I was so sick i truly thought I was going to die. I basically went through one CT and 2 rapid tapers in a very short time frame. Not wise or smart...but when your that sick...you will try anything to help yourself. Docs were CLUELESS!!!!

To sum it up...I did EVERYTHING wrong when it came to coming off Benzos. I'm sure what i did to my poor brain had a lot to do with the pain and suffering i went thru. But even me being a VERY extreme case. I'm hear to tell you that it does end. Your body WILL heal. Maybe not as fast as you like. But it knows how to fix itself. You have to go through it to believe it. The symptoms just fade away......

This part is VERY important to remember......
There is NO way through Benzo withdrawl....but through it.
Remember that sentence. I read that online when i first went CT. I was like WTF is that suppose to mean. But it all made sense after it was over.
 
Theres NO short cuts or secret remedies. I tried a lot of them. Its all bullshit. Get off the drugs and let your body heal. Its the ONLY cure.

Please TRY and taper off if all possible....i know its frustrating and time consuming. But its way better than shocking the shit out of your brain with a CT. I stopped going to doctors after my Pheno nightmare taper. Never went back. Never plan to. I just buried myself on this site and passed time while i was healing. I had NO choice. Everyrhing else i did was a EPIC failure!!!

Please believe me and the others on here that have gone through this before you. Were here to tell you that if we can make it....so can you. Theres nothing special about us. Were just normal people that got dependant on a very bad drug. We were you once upon a time. And now were here pulling you toward the finish line... just as others did for us when we were down.

Stay STRONG! Believe in yourself! Your not a quitter. You have a GREAT life ahead of you! The misery DOES end!
« Last Edit: April 19, 2019, 12:28:04 am by [Buddie] »
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: KROCK....The Sucess Story I never wrote......
« Reply #105 on: April 19, 2019, 01:48:45 am »
Thanks [...] for the inspo. Sorry you suffered so much but so glad to hear youre better :)

How long were you on benzos before your first CT?
Im in similar position, was CT, put back on 6 weeks later but not helped and now feel worse than I did when I quit them. Wish Id listened on here not to docs  and stayed off.
Doc wants to CT again as Im suffering so much on them, theyre making me sicker..

So i was on Valium for a few years before I went CT at a Detox Center. I tried to taper down and had no idea what the fuck I was doing. As I'm sure that happens with many. The withdrawl symptoms would kick in and I would dose back up out of fear and the CRAZY symptoms.

Long story short I checked myself into a high dollar rehab center in California. Major mistake!! All hell broke loose there. Loaded me up on a ton of seizure meds and ripped me off the Valium. I was still on 20 to 30mgs a day when that happened. The withdrawl ravaged my body and mind. I tried to reinstate due to the UNREAL pain and suffering. I cant explain to you how bad i was. So dam bad!!

 Anyways the reinstatement didn't work. I was to fucked up...pardon my language. I kept taking more Valium each day [...] i would go back to being normal and relaxed again. Unfortunately...that never came. I got sicker and sicker during the reinstatement. My doc was extremely worried about my health and safety. He never saw full blown benzo withdrawl like i had. I was then faced with a rapid taper off my failed reinstatement of 20mgs of Valium. That's was SUPER brutal because i was still in really bad shape from the CT at the Detox Center.

During my failed reinstatement....my doc put me on Phenobarbital to try and ease some of my withdrawl symptoms. Dont EVER take that shit.....it totally fucked me up beyond description. I then had to taper off of the Pheno. I was so sick i truly thought I was going to die. I basically went through one CT and 2 rapid tapers in a very short time frame. Not wise or smart...but when your that sick...you will try anything to help yourself. Docs were CLUELESS!!!!

To sum it up...I did EVERYTHING wrong when it came to coming off Benzos. I'm sure what i did to my poor brain had a lot to do with the pain and suffering i went thru. But even me being a VERY extreme case. I'm hear to tell you that it does end. Your body WILL heal. Maybe not as fast as you like. But it knows how to fix itself. You have to go through it to believe it. The symptoms just fade away......

This part is VERY important to remember......
There is NO way through Benzo withdrawl....but through it.
Remember that sentence. I read that online when i first went CT. I was like WTF is that suppose to mean. But it all made sense after it was over.
 
Theres NO short cuts or secret remedies. I tried a lot of them. Its all bullshit. Get off the drugs and let your body heal. Its the ONLY cure.

Please TRY and taper off if all possible....i know its frustrating and time consuming. But its way better than shocking the shit out of your brain with a CT. I stopped going to doctors after my Pheno nightmare taper. Never went back. Never plan to. I just buried myself on this site and passed time while i was healing. I had NO choice. Everyrhing else i did was a EPIC failure!!!

Please believe me and the others on here that have gone through this before you. Were here to tell you that if we can make it....so can you. Theres nothing special about us. Were just normal people that got dependant on a very bad drug. We were you once upon a time. And now were here pulling you toward the finish line... just as others did for us when we were down.

Stay STRONG! Believe in yourself! Your not a quitter. You have a GREAT life ahead of you! The misery DOES end!

[...] = Legend!
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: KROCK....The Sucess Story I never wrote......
« Reply #106 on: April 19, 2019, 05:04:21 am »
LEGEND + HOPE!!!
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: KROCK....The Sucess Story I never wrote......
« Reply #107 on: May 07, 2019, 05:01:12 am »
LEGEND + HOPE!!!

Thanks for your kind words! I want everyone here to make it through this deal. Support is key!

Please remember....when i first joined this site i was just the opposite of Hope....i was Hopeless. I was also VERY sick...lost...and scared.

That was then...and this is now. Its all gone. Would i ever have believed it back then? Hell No!  But here I am....and what Im telling you is true. You do heal...and your time WILL come.

Stay strong and believe in yourself. Listen to that inner voice inside your head. It wont mislead you. Keep distracting and making time pass. Time is the ultimate healer.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: KROCK....The Sucess Story I never wrote......
« Reply #108 on: May 07, 2019, 05:03:47 am »
☺❤
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: KROCK....The Sucess Story I never wrote......
« Reply #109 on: May 07, 2019, 08:48:06 pm »
Thanks for posting. I think what I love most about your posts is your so full of life and personality. It makes me want to hang out around you and yr just in the digital world. That is the thing I miss most is myself, my brain and my joy for life. I'm dealing with really bad suicidal ideation the past several days. I'm only barely 4 months of benzos rapid taper. Its scary because its not just suicidal thoughts but this feeling that I'm looking back on my life and all my mistakes and feeling like things will only get worse so its very logical to me to take control and end my life. Those are my thoughts and I know its benzo induced and I'm not gonna act on it but its non stop. Thank you for talking about this and giving hope that this is a common thing in w/d and it will eventually go away.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.