Author Topic: I'm still in here!  (Read 9135 times)

[Buddie]

Re: I'm still in here!
« Reply #20 on: September 07, 2018, 01:15:43 am »
Thank you so much, [...]!!! I've always thought that once I get off the bp pills (slowly, of course) that my bp will be normal again and also once I get rid of the benzo anxiety. The bp problems escalated when I was on all the pills and especially during Ativan and Klonopin. It seems that bp pills also cause their own problems. It's a never-ending battle, and of course the doctors don't understand and just give me more pills! I certainly concur with what you said about the nerves. Doctors have no idea what these drugs cause, and since everyone is different, some may experience one thing and others something else. Benzos then become a moving target, difficult to pin down. But that's what you get when you play havoc with the CNS by hijacking GABA and causing endless problems with nerves traveling throughout the body.

I'm thankful that you didn't take Losartan. I also have gotten Propranolol but don't feel well on it.

You're one tough guy!!! Blessings and a wonderful life to you!!!  :thumbsup: :thumbsup:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I'm still in here!
« Reply #21 on: September 07, 2018, 01:17:05 am »
[...] and Blue,
As you probably know [...], the anxiety that lots of us deal with during this process is not normal anxiety. Mine was an extreme 24/7 inner turmoil, terror and fear. For the period from when it started, during my agoraphobia, my taper and through my withdrawal it was constant. Having akathasia made it much, much worse. My mind never relaxed....even a few months in when I would have a brief respite late in the evening, it was still there messing with my thoughts.
Many times I felt like my mind wasn't my mind. I had suicidal thoughts every day for months, which were my intrusive thoughts Blue. I knew I didn't want to leave my wife and kids, but my mind told me I did. The "inner turmoil" was so exhausting that the pain and the lack of sleep at times seemed insurmountable. Perhaps you've been there. I don't want to get to specific about suicide, as this is a success story. You have to fight through every moment, and then hour and then day....one day we'll look back and realize we've climbed out of a dark deep hole without even knowing how far it was.
The anxiety and intrusive thoughts kept me at bay for almost a year. The anxiety started to lessen slightly for maybe an hour late at night after about 9 months so I used that as a sign that it was possible. I really believe too, like I said earlier that keeping a Journal of everything daily, how you feel, what helped, something positive, what to avoid...like foods helps looking back.
When I started doing this I rated my days 1-10 by how extreme my anxiety was. Good days at that time were 7's soooooo that shows where I was. I gave myself a [...] for days that something happened that felt somewhat normal. I would have possibly one maybe 2 stars a month initially.
After about 10 months I had some 5 or 6 days, and maybe 4 or 5 days in a month that got a [...]. This was important because as I looked back it was very helpful because when you're in the middle of it, you can't remember it was worse.
I just now looked at my journal and the last day I had 0 stars was June 1st....today is September 6th. Some days have 2 or 3 stars in that time, even a couple 4 [...] days!⭐⭐⭐⭐. Most days now are rated somewhere between 3-5 as far as anxiety level. It gets better, but it's not always linear. You WILL have setbacks, you will take 2 steps forward and 3 back at times, but your body is trying get back to homeostasis. It has to recover from the damage that it went through. It's not overnight for many of us.....but IT WILL GET BETTER!
THE KEY IS TO SURVIVE!!!!!!!!ONE MORE MOMENT, ONE MORE HOUR, ONE MORE DAY!!! As they add up you start to notice what you've came through and that you are stronger than you realized.💪

Keep swimming!!!🏊‍♂️

[...] this helps a little!!👍

Love❤ and prayers,

[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I'm still in here!
« Reply #22 on: September 07, 2018, 03:16:54 pm »
[...] - thank you SO MUCH for your story. I'm at 14 months out after three years of tolerance withdrawal and tapering, and I'm still suffering 60 different symptoms - yes, 60! My story is long and complicated, but not as much as yours. I pray to die most of the time, but I don't really want to. What the hell is life all about anyway? Just suffering and more suffering? But you have overcome tremendous misery and found happiness again. If you can, then I can too. Thank you for your inspiration.

[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I'm still in here!
« Reply #23 on: September 07, 2018, 03:49:36 pm »
Thanks [...]. Great story and such encouragement through this surreal experience.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I'm still in here!
« Reply #24 on: September 08, 2018, 11:54:18 am »
SO THRILLED FOR YOU [...]!!!!!!!!

 :smitten: [...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I'm still in here!
« Reply #25 on: September 08, 2018, 04:04:39 pm »
Thanks so very much for [...] back and giving so much [...] to us, [...]!! Just read about your terrible anxiety, and I'm getting comfort from it!!
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I'm still in here!
« Reply #26 on: September 08, 2018, 06:03:21 pm »
Lovely story gives me [...] at ten weeks off Valium thanks for sharing
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I'm still in here!
« Reply #27 on: September 08, 2018, 08:14:29 pm »
[...],
THANK YOU SO VERY MUCH for taking time to come back and post your success story. It means a lot to me and I am sure for all who are still struggling. Your story is full of [...], encouragement and inspiration that we will also heal and reclaim our normal life back.

May you continue to have joy, peace, wellness and blessings that you well deserved!

Blessings!

[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I'm still in here!
« Reply #28 on: September 09, 2018, 02:18:46 am »
Thanks for the positive feedback everyone. I've been there and know how you feel....it will get better! [...] is a wonderful thing, we must not lose it!

[...] and [...],
So good to here from some of the old KK. Always thinking of you guys along with Kgirl, Bennie, [...], [...], etc....[...] y'all are finding some peace. :thumbsup:

Love to everyone suffering, ❤

[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I'm still in here!
« Reply #29 on: September 11, 2018, 01:04:28 am »
[...],

SO, SO, SO very happy for you. You give [...] to those bringing up the rear. Iím two years out and still having some rough days. I canít tell you how wonderful it was to read your story. It really brought tears to my eyes! This story is providing strength and encouragement beyond what you can imagine.  Thank you again for sharing such intimate details. You are one strong warrior. Blessings to you...enjoy your life with your family.
Keep us in your prayers.

❤️[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.