Took My Last V Crumb Today - Already Healing!

I am so much happier than I was before long-term Valium caused my health to deteriorate. I have more energy, more motivation, more creativity. I'm enjoying more job satisfaction and financial stability, I'm on better terms with my family and friends, I'm reading for pleasure more, I'm writing again, I even have better fashion and hygiene, colors are more vibrant, all those little details that I never noticed or cared about now keep my spirits up. I did a lot of deliberate reflection and self-improvement work during my five month taper. When it started, I couldn't even begin to imagine what my life would be like on the other side. I just knew that I had to do it if I wanted to reclaim my life. And it has been really, really hard. The windows brought some relief and provided these little glimpses of wellness, and while I'm not completely there yet I already feel better than I knew was possible. This forum has been such a lifeline, and the support from everyone here at BB is incredible. I'm so excited and relieved to have my life back. It gets better!

 

Gwinna

Congrats Gwinna..

It is so great when that life floods back in..

You Earnt it, and more..

 

My best wishes as the last blips fade away..

 

Congrats Gwinna..

It is so great when that life floods back in..

You Earnt it, and more..

 

My best wishes as the last blips fade away..

 

Thanks Cantfly, and congratulations to you as well! We've both come so far. 

I have more energy, more motivation, more creativity. I'm enjoying more job satisfaction and financial stability, I'm on better terms with my family and friends, I'm reading for pleasure more, I'm writing again,

 

Good for you, Gwinna. I am glad those things are happening.

 

Virtually the same thing happened to me. It's as though life seeped back in gradually. Yes, things do get better! Hope they continue to get better and better for you.

 

Katz

I have more energy, more motivation, more creativity. I'm enjoying more job satisfaction and financial stability, I'm on better terms with my family and friends, I'm reading for pleasure more, I'm writing again,

 

Good for you, Gwinna. I am glad those things are happening.

 

Virtually the same thing happened to me. It's as though life seeped back in gradually. Yes, things do get better! Hope they continue to get better and better for you.

 

Katz

 

Thanks, Katz! I just have to keep telling myself that I'm allowed to be happy instead of waiting for the other shoe to drop.

I am so much happier than I was before long-term Valium caused my health to deteriorate. I have more energy, more motivation, more creativity. I'm enjoying more job satisfaction and financial stability, I'm on better terms with my family and friends, I'm reading for pleasure more, I'm writing again, I even have better fashion and hygiene, colors are more vibrant, all those little details that I never noticed or cared about now keep my spirits up. I did a lot of deliberate reflection and self-improvement work during my five month taper. When it started, I couldn't even begin to imagine what my life would be like on the other side. I just knew that I had to do it if I wanted to reclaim my life. And it has been really, really hard. The windows brought some relief and provided these little glimpses of wellness, and while I'm not completely there yet I already feel better than I knew was possible. This forum has been such a lifeline, and the support from everyone here at BB is incredible. I'm so excited and relieved to have my life back. It gets better!

 

Gwinna

 

So happy for you Things have gotten a lot easier for me once I quit Valium. You still may experience some nasty WD sxs, as Valium has a half-life of up to 8 days. I hope you manage to live without Valium. Any short-term discomfort was well worth the long-term gain in my case. Good luck.

So happy for you Things have gotten a lot easier for me once I quit Valium. You still may experience some nasty WD sxs, as Valium has a half-life of up to 8 days. I hope you manage to live without Valium. Any short-term discomfort was well worth the long-term gain in my case. Good luck.

 

 

Thanks, Estee! I anticipate some lingering symptoms over the next several weeks, but like you said, it's worth it to be safely off of this stuff. I'm glad you're having an easier time.

Congrats Gwinna, that's a pretty aggressive taper you you went through all this year.

 

Did you take anything to help you taper so fact?

Congratulations Gwinna!  This is an important day, it means FREEDOM!  Today exactly marks 15 months of my being benzo-free, it's so worth it.  Again, congratulations and the best of luck in your post-withdrawal, you'll do great!

Following...

Congrats Gwinna, that's a pretty aggressive taper you you went through all this year.

 

Did you take anything to help you taper so fact?

 

Thanks Caltn! Yes, my taper has been relatively quick compared to many who post here. Shout out to my Buddies in the Easy Taper Support Group!

 

Honestly...I smoked weed every single day of this taper. I remember discussing it on that area of the forum, but I didn't often bring it up in other places out of respect for those who believe a medication-free taper is best, or those who do not react well to pot (for instance, many feel more anxious). That's the only thing I "took," and it did help me a great deal. The symptoms never left, but they were much more manageable that way. As I continue to feel better, I'll be cutting back on the pot since daily use gets old after a while. It really helped with this taper and withdrawal, though.

 

Typically I would wake up feeling awful, but a hot shower and extra TLC in the morning (since I had cut back on caffeine) would get me moving. I'd have the most energy during the day so I got through work most of the time. I took a lot of half days and called out when it got really bad. I'd smoke pot when I got home from work, which would help me relax and deal with the withdrawal symptoms that tended to set in or get more severe in the evening because I would be tired by then. Most of the time I would be feeling well enough to go for a walk, sometimes just around the block and other times a few miles along the river. This wasn't always the case: Some days were awful and I couldn't do anything but lay there in my recliner. Some were good enough that I was able to see people and even travel. It hasn't been completely linear, since benzo withdrawal often isn't, but there has definitely been a trajectory that's a bit more clear in hindsight. I did a lot of self-care routines, tried to focus on the positive, and got very good at distracting myself. Basically, I engaged a whole lot of coping mechanisms.

 

I don't seem to be quite as sensitive to the Valium as some others here. I wasn't one of the lucky ones who got off this stuff without any problems, because I've definitely had a difficult time. I don't think I'm going to wind up being part of that small percentage of people who suffer protracted or really acute withdrawal, either. Since people who have an okay time stopping benzos tend not to have as much of a presence on this forum, it's not surprising that my experience seems to be in the minority here.

 

I hope that's good for people to see. I worry for new people who read our worst case scenarios and panic, assuming they will have just as much trouble. Everyone heals differently, I just try to focus on my own experience while offering what support I can to Buddies here whose experiences are different. And I have found that many of those Buddies who have been suffering the longest here tend to be some of the kindest and most supportive of my progress. 

 

Hope that answers your questions, Caltn. I hope you're doing well.

 

Gwinna

Congratulations Gwinna!  This is an important day, it means FREEDOM!  Today exactly marks 15 months of my being benzo-free, it's so worth it.  Again, congratulations and the best of luck in your post-withdrawal, you'll do great!

 

Aw, thanks ginger! I know I'm not out of the woods yet.

 

Gwinna

Gwinna,

So delighted for you that you had such an easy time with your taper and that you are free.... And yes I did read that that doesn't mean it was problem free but relatively easy compared to many on this forum.  And let's hear it for pot!  I can't smoke it, but sure think that for those that can it can really be such a godsend..

Your description of how life is showing up in technicolour is brilliant.  I know that the small dose of Valium that i have crossed over to definitely blunts lots of things for me, I sure wouldn't want to be on a higher dose.

 

Congratulations to a you !!

:smitten:

SS

Gwinna,

So delighted for you that you had such an easy time with your taper and that you are free.... And yes I did read that that doesn't mean it was problem free but relatively easy compared to many on this forum.  And let's hear it for pot!  I can't smoke it, but sure think that for those that can it can really be such a godsend..

Your description of how life is showing up in technicolour is brilliant.  I know that the small dose of Valium that i have crossed over to definitely blunts lots of things for me, I sure wouldn't want to be on a higher dose.

 

Congratulations to a you !!

:smitten:

SS

 

Thank you, SS. 

 

You've been so kind to me; I hope you're feeling better and that you get those colors back soon!

 

Gwinna

Congrats Gwinna, that's a pretty aggressive taper you you went through all this year.

 

Did you take anything to help you taper so fact?

 

Thanks Caltn! Yes, my taper has been relatively quick compared to many who post here. Shout out to my Buddies in the Easy Taper Support Group!

 

Honestly...I smoked weed every single day of this taper. I remember discussing it on that area of the forum, but I didn't often bring it up in other places out of respect for those who believe a medication-free taper is best, or those who do not react well to pot (for instance, many feel more anxious). That's the only thing I "took," and it did help me a great deal. The symptoms never left, but they were much more manageable that way. As I continue to feel better, I'll be cutting back on the pot since daily use gets old after a while. It really helped with this taper and withdrawal, though.

 

Typically I would wake up feeling awful, but a hot shower and extra TLC in the morning (since I had cut back on caffeine) would get me moving. I'd have the most energy during the day so I got through work most of the time. I took a lot of half days and called out when it got really bad. I'd smoke pot when I got home from work, which would help me relax and deal with the withdrawal symptoms that tended to set in or get more severe in the evening because I would be tired by then. Most of the time I would be feeling well enough to go for a walk, sometimes just around the block and other times a few miles along the river. This wasn't always the case: Some days were awful and I couldn't do anything but lay there in my recliner. Some were good enough that I was able to see people and even travel. It hasn't been completely linear, since benzo withdrawal often isn't, but there has definitely been a trajectory that's a bit more clear in hindsight. I did a lot of self-care routines, tried to focus on the positive, and got very good at distracting myself. Basically, I engaged a whole lot of coping mechanisms.

 

I don't seem to be quite as sensitive to the Valium as some others here. I wasn't one of the lucky ones who got off this stuff without any problems, because I've definitely had a difficult time. I don't think I'm going to wind up being part of that small percentage of people who suffer protracted or really acute withdrawal, either. Since people who have an okay time stopping benzos tend not to have as much of a presence on this forum, it's not surprising that my experience seems to be in the minority here.

 

I hope that's good for people to see. I worry for new people who read our worst case scenarios and panic, assuming they will have just as much trouble. Everyone heals differently, I just try to focus on my own experience while offering what support I can to Buddies here whose experiences are different. And I have found that many of those Buddies who have been suffering the longest here tend to be some of the kindest and most supportive of my progress. 

 

Hope that answers your questions, Caltn. I hope you're doing well.

 

Gwinna

 

Wow Gwinna!! Congratulations and I am so glad you explained how you did that "aggressive taper" to coin Caltn's term. It must have been a bit of a wild ride with some of those big cuts!! Pleased you said I worry for new people who read our worst case scenarios and panic, assuming they will have just as much trouble. It is difficult not to focus on that, but I keep myself distracted by coming up with various ways to keep my focus elsewhere.

 

So far I've not had any issues with Valium and hope against hope they don't arise.

 

Again congratulations and thanks again for sharing your experience 

 

Harmonee

 

Congrats Gwinna, that's a pretty aggressive taper you you went through all this year.

 

Did you take anything to help you taper so fact?

 

Thanks Caltn! Yes, my taper has been relatively quick compared to many who post here. Shout out to my Buddies in the Easy Taper Support Group!

 

Honestly...I smoked weed every single day of this taper. I remember discussing it on that area of the forum, but I didn't often bring it up in other places out of respect for those who believe a medication-free taper is best, or those who do not react well to pot (for instance, many feel more anxious). That's the only thing I "took," and it did help me a great deal. The symptoms never left, but they were much more manageable that way. As I continue to feel better, I'll be cutting back on the pot since daily use gets old after a while. It really helped with this taper and withdrawal, though.

 

Typically I would wake up feeling awful, but a hot shower and extra TLC in the morning (since I had cut back on caffeine) would get me moving. I'd have the most energy during the day so I got through work most of the time. I took a lot of half days and called out when it got really bad. I'd smoke pot when I got home from work, which would help me relax and deal with the withdrawal symptoms that tended to set in or get more severe in the evening because I would be tired by then. Most of the time I would be feeling well enough to go for a walk, sometimes just around the block and other times a few miles along the river. This wasn't always the case: Some days were awful and I couldn't do anything but lay there in my recliner. Some were good enough that I was able to see people and even travel. It hasn't been completely linear, since benzo withdrawal often isn't, but there has definitely been a trajectory that's a bit more clear in hindsight. I did a lot of self-care routines, tried to focus on the positive, and got very good at distracting myself. Basically, I engaged a whole lot of coping mechanisms.

 

I don't seem to be quite as sensitive to the Valium as some others here. I wasn't one of the lucky ones who got off this stuff without any problems, because I've definitely had a difficult time. I don't think I'm going to wind up being part of that small percentage of people who suffer protracted or really acute withdrawal, either. Since people who have an okay time stopping benzos tend not to have as much of a presence on this forum, it's not surprising that my experience seems to be in the minority here.

 

I hope that's good for people to see. I worry for new people who read our worst case scenarios and panic, assuming they will have just as much trouble. Everyone heals differently, I just try to focus on my own experience while offering what support I can to Buddies here whose experiences are different. And I have found that many of those Buddies who have been suffering the longest here tend to be some of the kindest and most supportive of my progress. 

 

Hope that answers your questions, Caltn. I hope you're doing well.

 

Gwinna

 

Wow Gwinna!! Congratulations and I am so glad you explained how you did that "aggressive taper" to coin Caltn's term. It must have been a bit of a wild ride with some of those big cuts!! Pleased you said I worry for new people who read our worst case scenarios and panic, assuming they will have just as much trouble. It is difficult not to focus on that, but I keep myself distracted by coming up with various ways to keep my focus elsewhere.

 

So far I've not had any issues with Valium and hope against hope they don't arise.

 

Again congratulations and thanks again for sharing your experience 

 

Harmonee

 

and not to steal Gwinna's thunder here, But look at you go Harmonee!

Fantastic! so glad that you've had no problems, no need to expect any!

 

Here's to Easy(er) Tapers!

:smitten:

SS

Thanks SS  That's really kind or you  Hope all is going well for you in your neck of the woods?

 

Harmonee

Thanks SS  That's really kind or you  Hope all is going well for you in your neck of the woods?

 

Harmonee

Well I’m in the woods — literally— in my island cabin, but certainly not out of the woods with the beast....

Holding holding holding— I’ll do a 🐢 off— seems to suit this body this time..

And so very delighted to see others saunter off....

💕💕

SS

Harmony, thank you for the kind words! Your positive vibes really helped me through some of the bad days.

 

SS - Thinking of you as you continue to hold. You've got this!

 

Gwinna

Your succes with taper inspires me and gives me hope i can pull trough this with Ashton method schedule!

 

Gongratulations and wish you all the best in future!

Your succes with taper inspires me and gives me hope i can pull trough this with Ashton method schedule!

 

Gongratulations and wish you all the best in future!

 

Thanks, BeStrong! You've got this! 

 

Gwinna

hey gwinna,

 

congrats!!! Brave one!! Happy happy birthday!!!

Please give a huge party for you and buy yourself something that will forever remind you on that date! Please do this! In my eyes you have saved a life, your life!!

Its so important to celebrate as if there was no tomorrow - because there IS a tomorrow, a drug-free tomorrow and happier days to come!!

 

Marigold

hey gwinna,

 

congrats!!! Brave one!! Happy happy birthday!!!

Please give a huge party for you and buy yourself something that will forever remind you on that date! Please do this! In my eyes you have saved a life, your life!!

Its so important to celebrate as if there was no tomorrow - because there IS a tomorrow, a drug-free tomorrow and happier days to come!!

 

Marigold

 

Thanks, Marigold! 

 

I'm brainstorming tattoo ideas, actually! I definitely want to celebrate the milestone.  You're right though, I definitely feel that I've saved my own life - the way I was living while still taking Valium was not sustainable and I'm so glad I was able to make such an important change. Now I feel like I'm celebrating just by enjoying my day to day life! I jokingly tell my friends I've had my mid-life crisis at 33. 

 

I appreciate the support and well wishes.

 

Gwinna

hey gwinna,

 

congrats!!! Brave one!! Happy happy birthday!!!

Please give a huge party for you and buy yourself something that will forever remind you on that date! Please do this! In my eyes you have saved a life, your life!!

Its so important to celebrate as if there was no tomorrow - because there IS a tomorrow, a drug-free tomorrow and happier days to come!!

 

Marigold

 

Thanks, Marigold! 

 

I'm brainstorming tattoo ideas, actually! I definitely want to celebrate the milestone.  You're right though, I definitely feel that I've saved my own life - the way I was living while still taking Valium was not sustainable and I'm so glad I was able to make such an important change. Now I feel like I'm celebrating just by enjoying my day to day life! I jokingly tell my friends I've had my mid-life crisis at 33. 

 

I appreciate the support and well wishes.

 

Gwinna

 

Wait a year before getting a tattoo because you might react on the colours. Being med-free it takes a lot of time until the body isnt reacting on anything anymore. But you can get that picture printed and hang it on a wall!!

Wait a year before getting a tattoo because you might react on the colours. Being med-free it takes a lot of time until the body isnt reacting on anything anymore. But you can get that picture printed and hang it on a wall!!

 

Ooof, yeah! I wouldn't get it right away, I still get overstimulated pretty easily and wouldn't want the sensation of having it done just yet. Maybe in a few months or so. Gives me time to settle on just the right design...

 

Gwinna