Should I Re-Instate? I need feedback

I am struggling.  I am 7 weeks into this and I spend all day in bed.  I can sleep about 6 hours and go for a short walk during the day.  I have waves of anxiety, restlessness during the day, sensitivity to sound (light and heat), and the worst are the brain zaps.  The more I do the more intense the brain zaps are the next day.  If I leave the house and do things the next two days are hell.  All I want to do is lay in bend and TV is too stimulating most of the day.

 

I had taken a low (.25-.5MG) 3-4 week dose of Xanax when I was struggling and stressing during the recovery from a surgery.  Before that I had taken a low dose of Valium (really only 9 pills at 5MG).  The Valium made me feel awful.  When I was taking the Xanax I did not feel awful like the Valium.

 

The first 2 weeks off was insane.  I feel like the last week or so I am worse in some ways.

 

I really can't function (besides a shower, making small meals, and a load of laundry every other day).

 

Should re-instate and taper? 

7 weeks after C/T?

Reinstate soon!

Still It's possible to be able to get back.

If it's 7 months you never get back.

 

DON DO C/T NEVER.

Restart by a slow tapering on yearly basis.

Sorry to hear about what you're gong through.  I had a similar bout of taking benzos 35 or so times, over the course of a few months, and didn't taper.  At almost seven months out, I'm not recovered, but not as bad as some people who were on it much longer, even though they carefully tapered.  It's a tough call to make, with comparatively low use.

At 7 months, Can you function?  Work? 

 

What would be a good option to reinstate with?  My body hated the Valium.  It liked the Xanax, clearly

 

There’s so much stress.  I am losing my apartment, my job, maybe my truck.

You did four 10mg valiums and four 2 mg xanax? Reinstate from what? Im very curious that you are suffering-at seven weeks out with such a miniscule amount of benzos. No way should you “reinstate” because you hardly did any benzos to begin with and if you are having this difficult a time after doing four valium and four 2mg xanax then you will only be intentionally punishing yourself because your body cannot tolerate even miniscule amounts of benzos without great suffering. I urge you to see a Dr. to see if something else is going in with you because suffering for two months after doing the amount listed seems impossible. Again......reinstate from what? You never had a daily regime to begin with so reinstatement would simply be using everyday for months which would be unwise given you suffer so greatly on miniscule amounts which means something else is going on or maybe you are highly allergic to benzos. Good luck.

I was in a medical crisis before and during taking the benzo's.

 

Over about a 45 day period I took about 20 doses (2.5MG) every few days.  The valium gave me awful stomach cramps.

 

I then took about 25 doses of Xanax.  I broke most of the .5MG pills in half.  This was while I was bed bound struggling with healing from a gallbladder surgery. 

 

I am very sensitive to medications.  I don't use drugs or drink. 

 

Please don't dismiss what I am dealing with.  This has been hell.

 

At 7 months, Can you function?  Work? 

 

What would be a good option to reinstate with?  My body hated the Valium.  It liked the Xanax, clearly

 

There’s so much stress.  I am losing my apartment, my job, maybe my truck.

I was never one to do much, so there's not much difference in my functioning.  I am depressed, more than usual.

 

I am older, thin, and retired.  I may have been more affected than a younger person.  I also took Xanax about 3 times a week from 2004 to 2009, but did not experience as bad a WD as my recent short-term use of Klonopin.  Age is a factor, I believe.

 

Sorry, I have no answer what you can reinstate with, besides Vaiium, I'm not knowledgeable enough on the subject.

 

I hope you feel better, soon. 

I didnt intend to be dismissive rather the opposite. Dozens of times in my life i have injested similar and even higher doses then you have without much issue. Maybe a few days nervousness but certainly not months of unending suffering. My point was that maybe something else is going on because you recently had surgery. Have you considered seeing a Dr. to see if it may be something else or are you sure it is benzo related? But mostly i wanted to advise against reinstatement because if you are having severe issues now then i honestly believe you are unable to tolerate even the smallest amount of benzos given you are severly suffering on the small amount and amount of time you were on before. If someone came on this site and said “hey guys, i had a weekend binge of four 10mg valium and four 2mg xanax-do you think ill be ok?” I would tell that person “Oh-you may be nervous for a few days but then youll be cool” No way would i think that guy would suffer horrendously for two plus months. No way. It would make me believe the guy had another medical issue going on, hence me recommending you maybe consider getting testing. Then again, you spread your dosages out so......?  Again-my point wasnt to be dismissive rather it was to consider something else could possibly be going on. Thats it. You state: “I was in a medical crisis BEFORE taking benzos.” What was the medical crisis?

Like many I have been to the ER several times with anxiety and panic attacks.  They did blood work and scans.  (Just not a head MRI, but that is coming next as a just in case.)  The surgery healed 100%. 

 

As soon as I stopped taking the Xanax I went into W/D.  The first 4 days were hell.  The first month was hell.  Waking up with numb fore-arms.  Racing thoughts.  Intrussive thoughts.  Super loud ear ringing.  Trouble with my balance when walking.  Then the brain zaps started.  They current cycle is the brain zap starts at 2 in the morning and goes until 6AM.  Then I get multiple more a day, that include adrenal surges.  I have constant restlessness, sometimes it is much worse and I have to go walk around.  I could go on.

You said you have trouble with balance when walking.  But, you go for walks? 

 

When you had your surgery did they give you any antibiotics while you were taking the Benzos?

Thats the horrid dillema of benzos. People take them for panic attacks but then they make you panic AND suffer much worse then ever before. Again-my advice is to not even consider “reinstating” because you never really had a “habit” to begin with and you have two months under your belt. Im sure a xanax sounds woderful to you right now but i believe you are very close to feeling much better and reinstating from the dose you were on would make matters much worse then they are.

No antibiotics. 

 

I am so restless I am going to walk again.  Already walked a couple miles earlier.

If you went back on the Benzo and it didn’t work in relieving your symptoms, then what? 

 

Did you have any alcohol or have you ever used a Benzo in the past, even briefly?

No alcohol for 2 years.  Was only social drinker prior to that.  No marijuana for two years.  Had used prior to that regularly.  Hi stress commission only sales job.  About 15 years ago took some Xanax on 1 night out drinking.  No other benzo use.

Exactly what are your symptoms?

Brain zaps that last 1hr-7hrs.  Can’t lift my head from the pillow.  Ears ringing super loud during zaps (but always ringing pretty loud) Several times a day.

Severe restlessness.  Have to walk several miles.  Can’t sit still.

Adrenal surges.

Shortness of breath, tightness in chest. 

Tightness/contracting abdominal and lowback muscles.

Cognitive issues.  Memory.  Balance.  Strength.

Some constipation.

Sensitivity to sound and light when having brain zaps.

Anxiety and panicky

...there is more.  That’s a good start.

 

Brain zaps that last 1hr-7hrs.  Can’t lift my head from the pillowEars ringing super loud during zaps (but always ringing pretty loud) Several times a day.

Severe restlessness.  Have to walk several miles  Can’t sit still.

Adrenal surges.

Shortness of breath, tightness in chest. 

Tightness/contracting abdominal and lowback muscles.

Cognitive issues.  Memory.  BalanceStrength.

Some constipation.

Sensitivity to sound and light when having brain zaps.

Anxiety and panicky

...there is more.  That’s a good start.

 

How are you able to walk miles?

 

Your usage was approx a month?

You are able to work and function.  If you considered reinstating what would you reinstate on?

Over about 45 days took 20 doses of Valium.

 

Then took about 25 doses of Xanax while on bed rest healing from home the surgery.

 

Was in a lot of pain from the surgery.  Had internal scar tissue pain caused by Valium WD.

The surgery is 100% healed.

 

While taking the Valium is when I started developing abdominal tension and sensitive to light and sound.

 

All hell broke loose loose when I stopped taking the Xanax.

No I cannot work or function. I’ve tried to go do stuff for a day and I end up in bed.  My abdominal muscles are constantly tight, sometimes very tight others less.

 

Was thinking of going back on Xanax at .25 or .5mg.  My original prescription was for .5 but I broke most of them in half.

You stated you walk several miles a day?.

Not everyday.  Some days I get woke up and have to get out of bed and start moving because I am so restless.

 

Is this relevant?  Just asking nicely

The reason I was asking is because the severity of what you’re experiencing sounds inconsistent.  Goes from was appears to be very severe and debilitating to not too bad able to walk miles and working. 

 

It helps to clarify what is happening to determine an answer to your question.

 

 

I can’t work at all.  I spend all day in bed.  In the evening things sometimes calm down and I can watch tv.

 

I get waves of fear and anxiety.

 

This is consistently bad.  I walk because I can’t sit still.

I apologize I thought you were working. 

 

Have you tried a small dose of anything to see if your symptoms abated?