Author Topic: 1 month off and getting better all the time.  (Read 4638 times)

[Buddie]

1 month off and getting better all the time.
« on: June 02, 2010, 06:11:58 pm »
Its time to post here and it feels really good to offer some encouragement and hope. I used to be so envious of people who had gotten off of Benzos and at the same time really scared of coming off them myself. It turned out that most of the fear and horror stories didnt happen as they so often dont.
I had been on various Benzos since summer 2006 and never thought I would still be on them 4 years later. For me Benzos are seriously nasty drugs, not so much in terms of the physical effects of being on them and of withdrawal and this is not to negate these effects as serious because they are, no the worst part for me was in there emotional effects. Feeling emotionally numb is no way to be leading ones life. The term 'sleepwalking through life' is as perfect a summation of living day to day on Benzodiazapines as I have heard and sums it all up for me.

The good news is it does'nt have to be a horribly painful process to withdraw from Benzos and this time it has not been so for me and I will give some simple reasons for that which have worked for me.

The most important change in my journey was thinking positively. Sounds too simple dos'nt it? I can hear myself on previous attempts to quit saying some of the following:
'Yes but I have this problem in my life'
'if it was that easy why then do so many people struggle to come off'
'I heard that its dangerous to come off too quickly'

This has caused me to stay stuck on Benzos for 4 years of unremitting soulless hell. As soon as I turned it around and said 'I can do this' and 'the problems in my life will get better, I just need faith in myself that I can do this' as soon as I did this I managed to get off Benzos for good.
It was a quick taper as well. I tapered from 40-80mg in February down to my last 5mg of Diazepam a month ago. All in all a little over 3 months.
I had none of the horror stories I had read so much about and found the whole experience to be realtively easy compared to my previous attempts. It was toughest the first 2 weeks after my final dose but I found my sleep actually improved immensley as the levels of Benzo got lower as did my mood and physical health. These are all gifts that I am immensley grateful for and are just around the corner for anyone who is tapering at the moment. It really does get so much better. Getting the last of it out of my system is like opening the heavy dusty curtains of a long darkened and stagnent room and finding trees and sunshine cascading in through the room.

My advice from personnal experience is still to get off of Benzo's as soon as possible and as quickly as possible and have no fear that it will be horrible as it just may not be so. It may be incredible. It certainly is for me. I'm not saying its easy because its not, however I would not swap one day of feeling anxious for 1 hour of supposed Benzo tranquility. I was watching a docu the other night about a war ship and the captain told his team at the start of a training exersize that 'its ok to be nervous- it tells you that your alive' and thats the summing up I have learned from this whole process that its better to feel all the myriad feelings that come with authentic living than any of the foggy and dopey drugged out Benzo half life or really no-life at all.
It does'nt have to be all about pain and torture. We were made to feel all of everything at every moment. Anything less is selling yourself way too short.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 1 month off and getting better all the time.
« Reply #1 on: June 02, 2010, 07:17:35 pm »
Doc,

Thank you for writing your Success Story, you offer so much hope!  I agree that when you finally made up your mind, and changed your thinking it became almost easy to rid yourself of the drug.  I'm so happy for you.

[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 1 month off and getting better all the time.
« Reply #2 on: June 02, 2010, 10:17:58 pm »
THANK YOU!!!!

See my sig; I'm in a fast taper, not by choice.  It's possible that my psychiatrist will let me slow down, but maybe not.

I've kind of wondered if BB gave an inaccurate sample of people getting off benzos: after all, if you have no trouble with it, why seek out a support group?  So it makes sense that not everybody goes through the pit, but it is wonderful to hear somebody confirm it besides my psychiatrist and counselor.

I agree about the positive thinking.  I'm feeling withdrawals today, but they aren't really that bad: it's just if I freak myself out by telling myself that I'm on the express elevator back to the pit that abuse+cold turkey put me in (or I put myself in!)

Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 1 month off and getting better all the time.
« Reply #3 on: June 03, 2010, 01:48:00 am »
Thanks for taking the time to post your experience, Doc.  ;D So many people don't come back once they feel better so I especially appreciate those that do.  No matter how many times I tell people about the importance of how you think about this journey, nothing beats a report like this from someone who's been there.  :thumbsup:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 1 month off and getting better all the time.
« Reply #4 on: June 03, 2010, 01:54:34 am »
Thanks for posting and giving the rest of us hope!  It was great to read your story.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 1 month off and getting better all the time.
« Reply #5 on: June 03, 2010, 11:38:18 pm »
Thank you, Doc.  A whole new world has now opened up for you and I can see how much you appreciate it.  Once you learned to call on a higher power and started thinking positive thoughts everything changed drastically for you.  Your blogs have insight for others who may want to follow your journey.  You will forever be in my heart.  Please continue to give ocassional updates, OK?

Love,

[...]  xoxoxo
« Last Edit: June 20, 2010, 01:04:01 am by [Buddie] »
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 1 month off and getting better all the time.
« Reply #6 on: June 10, 2010, 09:24:56 pm »
Thank you for your post Doc! I'm really happy for you.  :)
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 1 month off and getting better all the time.
« Reply #7 on: June 20, 2010, 12:26:25 am »
Thank you so much for sharing your story, I find it surreal to read the accounts of other people and feel as though we have been living parallell lives through this.
I am at .375mg of clonazepam tapering down from 8mg which I used for over 7 years..it has been a long road and to read what you have written...how you now live free of this demon means alot to me.
I hope you have nothing but sunny days now that the fog has lifted

Jacqueline
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 1 month off and getting better all the time.
« Reply #8 on: June 23, 2010, 03:52:51 pm »
Thank you so much for your story, it really gives me hope. Glad you are doing great!  :yippee:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: 1 month off and getting better all the time.
« Reply #9 on: April 15, 2019, 05:06:32 pm »
Bump
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.