Intro about Strykergunner AKA Andy B

Hey yall'

   I'm Andy from northern Indiana.  I'm writing this for the member approval thing but I'll go into much greater detail when I figure out this whole this.  I'm 27 year old and was medically retired from the U.S. Army summer of 09' for PTSD and mTBI.  I've been taking the drug clonazepam for over 5 years now and was refered to this site via a friend I make on You-tube.  I am married....twice now.  I have a 5 Y.O. from the previous that I see weekly and got a bun in the oven of wife number deuce.  I have been fighting to get off this poison since my early retirement from the Army with ups and downs and good times and bad...this it a bad. So, I hope this is good enough to get me in your club of Benzo support cause my life SUCKSsssss.....oh I was in the war 2 times....03'-05' and 06'-07.5' with a total of THREE years in what we called the $hit.  I was a SSG when I was retired and joined as a 19K Abrams Tanker but was OJT'd to 11B Infantry Squad Leader and below in 04 when I got to Fort Lewis.  I did 7 years.  Was at Ft. Lewis for 6 and Ft. Irwin for 1...now I'm on Ft. Couch, Indiana.  

 

Thanks and I look forward to getting to know people and learning how to rid myself of the poison that is ruining mine and my families life!

 

Thanks, Andy B

 

Sorry I'll add a lil' more.  I'm on 3mg a day now and It's get worse....I did the Coleman institute of horror and yeah...life is suckin'. but I'm SLOWWWWWLLLLY starting to stabilize again.. **knock on wood** 

Hi Andy,

 

I'd be happy to approve your account to BenzoBuddies, however I'm concerned with the amount of personal information you've provided.  I just wanted to give you an opportunity to edit if you'd care to.  If not, then just let me know by posting here and I'll approve you.  We're glad you're here, we can help you, count on it.

 

Pam

Andy,

 

Just to let you know there is a 'modify' button in the upper right hand corner of your post. Click on it, make your changes, and click 'save'. 

Thanks....I modified it first and then I'm writing this one to let you know I'm a real human...lol...that is suffering from Benzo W/D!  I hope you guys can help...your site is HIGHLY recommended!  Also, nice E-meeting you two!

 

Andy B

Hello again Andy and Welcome to BenzoBuddies!

 

I'm sorry to hear of yours and your families suffering, we all know how bad these drugs can mess up our lives!  You'll find the support you need here to taper safely, we'll help you for as long as you need us.  

 

I've often read about our military troops on benzodiazepines and I cringe each time I think about what that member is facing when they try to go off of it.  I'm sorry to see you in this situation.

 

Thanks for telling us your current dose, is the Coleman Institute a detox center?

 

Pam

Pam-

Thanks a ton!  I'll be on later tonight after my Doc appointment to start reading and letting you guys know more about my situation.  You'll be glad to know that I just battled thru depression WITHOUT additional meds against my Docs wishes and I feel better....poison pill pushin' physicians...lol----It's mostly a lack of education on their part I believe.

 

 

See yall!

Andy B 

Welcome Andy!

Hi Andy

Welcome to the forum  It was nice talking to you earlier

Take care!

 

welcome andy and thank you for your service, you found a great place to make a plan and you will succeed, just have to go slowly and surely.

Welcome Andy!

 

First off, thank you so much for serving our country. I know us mere civilians cannot wrap our minds around what it must be like to serve in a war.

I don't understand all the acronyms, but it sounds like you've been around the block quite a few times!

 

Secondly - congrats on the upcoming arrival of your new baby!

 

I'm sorry you had to go through the horror of the Coleman institute (detox?)

I went through a 5 day Benzo detox and it was one of the worst experiences of my life. Luckily I found this site, then I found a good doctor to help me.

 

There are many kind and compassionate people hear that will help you every step of the way.

 

Hang in there, help is on the way

Kim

Welcome to BB, Andy.  I want to thank you for serving for the good, old USA.  Someone recently sent me photos of our service members who encountered PTSD and it broke my heart.

 

You will get plenty of support on this forum.....after all, a new baby is on the way. 

 

Patty  xo

;D Hey yall'

 

Thanks!  Well today was pretty important I think.  I met with a new Doc that in good with benzo and is on our side.  I currently take 3mg of Clonazepam a day...9am, 3pm, and 9pm......This is my highest dosage yet and it was barely enough.  The Doc today was SOOOoooooo mad they even started me on a benzo in the first place!  It's been about 5 years now that I've been taking it and like I stated above that it forced me into early retirement from the Army.  Yes....that's right...I'm 27 and retired.....pathetic I know.  ANYWHO!- He is switching me from the 3mg's of Clon to 4 mg's of Xanax XR to get me stabilized and then wants to taper when I am ready.  I know that you can't taper from the xanax xr by cutting or titration but he knows this too....It's just to try it out...The goal is to take just one 2mg X xr at 9am and the same again at 9pm...He seemed like one of the best Docs yet and actually gave a $hit or at least it seemed.  So with the info I've given you all....what do you think about it.  I start my first dose tomorrow morning and I'm actually happy for once...If it doesn't work he said he has a few other tricks up his sleeves.  I've never had a Doc actually talk to me like this!  By far helps...I hope it doesn't go bad...if it does that's why we got E.R.'s and if it goes worse than that....it is what it is.  BRING ON THE TORTURE or let the healing begin.

 

Strykergunner - OUT!

Hi Andy,

 

I'm concerned but I don't want to bring you down, you sound too good.  Putting you on Xanax and especially XR seems pointless to me.  Why put you a pill you can't taper from?  And say you do stabilize on it, at some point will he switch you to regular Xanax?  It's the worst drug to taper from because of it's short half life.  Leaving you on the Klonopin would have been the much better choice in my opinion.

 

I have another concern, Klonopin and Xanax are the same strength, why would he increase your dose by one whole milligram?  If you do start a taper, you're going to be months more into this than if you could stay at a lesser dose?  And while they're the same in strength, they are not identical, so it might be better for you to do a slow crossover to minimize the effect of the switch.

 

I'm sorry, but this doesn't make sense to me!

 

I thought that too....I mentioned it but he stated that the XR would make it so I can stop taking 3 or 4 Clon a day and just the 2 X xr's.  It was on $3 bucks with insurance and the V.A. still give me the Clon...I guess I can call him and talk to him about it....I also have to talk withe V.A. today.....they however don't want me to get off or taper...just stay where I am at and then add SSRI's which I hate and will not do. 

 

?? :'(

I see the people in the waiting room all zombies out from whatever drug they are on and I feel I don't belong here...maybe they don't either but they are institutionalized by the system, more pills they give out they have assurance of a job !  Don't let that happen to you. I said in another post that I feel that if I am not hearing voices and wanting to harm people are myself I don't need a psychiatrist and their pills. You really don't need to tell them you want to taper off the K just get the K and play their game while you Taper off the pill... Once again if I am way out of bounds just forget what I said, I don't mean any harm it's just I am a American and I like my freedoms of choice and I don't like people taking away my freedoms without warning me, I can reason with the best of them. Don't take the pills, if they insist take them and flush them. Just get off the K slowly it's the best way.

I see, he wants you to switch because he has no intention of letting you taper off of it!  This is insanity, the manufacturers of this drug say to only stay on it for 2 to 4 weeks, why don't our Dr's pay attention to this?  The drug manufactures have spent the most money in research, they understand as much or more than any other entity about the harmful effects of this class of drug and yet the Dr's ignore this and say, if it works, keep on taking it.

 

The problem is it doesn't work!  Once your body reaches tolerance, the drug starts to create the problems you were put on them to fix.  Your anxiety reaches new heights, you begin to have panic attacks, you develop muscles problems, stomach issues and emotional problems.  Now you're going to be diagnosed with fibromyalgia, MS and bipolar disorder because the Dr's don't know it's the drug making you feel this way. 

 

Thousands of dollars will be spent on your medical tests, countless sleepless nights and visits to the ER will result in you not knowing anymore than you did before. 

 

Please take control of your situation, please do the right thing for yourself.  You have our support whatever you decide to do, but I hope you'll choose life rather than a drugged haze.  The only way to feel better once tolerance kicks in it to take ever increasing doses, and we all know that isn't possible. 

Hmmmm it's hard to say.  My concern is that this is not taper friendly.  Have you considered tapering some more of the K and then crossing over to valium?   I would just hate to see you stuck on the X Xr forever.   Unless this guy is really good.    I would ask specifically and in detail how he plans to get you off.  Don't rush into it.   You can always take some time to think about it.   Are you in the position where you can't get more K?   Would he work with you just to taper it off?    If you can I think I'd taper off and not start the Xanax.  Titrating the K might be easier for you.  I think that's eventually what I'm going to do.

hang in there

 

Pam is right......when you feel like crap it's so tempting to have someone give you a quick fix but don't do something to make this worse.

Everyone here is always ready to listen .....you need to think about the long term repercussions of this decision.  It's hell for all of us to get off but you can do it.  Many people before you have.  You can do it too

is he any good ? of course he is no good he already wants to put andy on a ssri the first time he met him...andy take cover we got your back, you need the right ammo to win this battle.

.I also have to talk withe V.A. today.....they however don't want me to get off or taper

 

that's the way I would play it...get the K and taper directly off the K and not say a word...

 

ok I am out...good luck friend.

EYE OPENER!

 

This sucks now but I agree with you guys....I am not going to take it in the AM like he said.  I will call him and talk about my concern....He said and I qoute "Your addicted to Clonz, that's why you feel like $hit....try the X xr's and stabalize.....I believe that NOW I am in w/d from clonz.....I was at .125 then c/t...then E.R.- re-ensated to 1mg AM 1mgPM then went to "the Coleman Institute" of horror and after day one was given an adivan shot and re-enstated to 3 MG's a day on Clon and I have HORRIBLE anxiety.....why do I feel worse if I'm on more than I've ever been???  

 

 

one last thing...in the early days of me getting on a benzo I was also given buspar or imipramine I forgot, I took it a few times and it made my feet itch so I never took it again and just went back to get my scripts that included Valium, I would go right into the bathroom at the med center and flush the pill that made my feet itch...that was almost 20 years ago, I never took another pill other than a benzo in all this time...

 

 

Lol - I called the office at 3:50 and they were all gone? It's Tuesday?  Funny isn't it....I guess this guy is a smooth talker...SO finally....we ALL agree that going from 3 mg's of K a day to 4 mg's of X xr a day is WRONG and to NOT do it?!  Like I said earlier I am on the most I've ever been and I still feel the worse?!?  Why?  

A benzo is a benzo is a benzo, it amazes me when I hear of someone being switched to another one when that's not the answer.  I think you're feeling rotten because your body went into withdrawal mode because of being jacked around with all of those dosage changes.  This ship doesn't turn on a dime, it takes awhile to get stabilized after this happens.  You could try hanging out for awhile longer on the 3 mg, but sometimes your body can't snap out of it and you know that the only way out of this is to get off of the drug. 

 

And what was that in the Institute, a shot of Ativan?  Gees, they had you all over the map!    Figures they'd all be gone just when you need them.  Do you have enough Klonopin to take until you can get this resolved?

Good for you Andy...stay the course and don't make this switch out of anxiety or fear.  I would plan a slow sensible taper off of the K.  I think it's your only choice.