Unnatural anxiety

Before benzos and withdrawal, my "naturally occurring" anxiety was NOTHING like the anxiety I'm left with now.

 

There is literally nothing that I'm afraid of right now, but my body is in a never ending state of physiologic, unnaturally occurring intense anxiety that sometimes escalates to panic attacks, which are also unnaturally severe and like I've never experienced prior to benzos and withdrawal.

 

My neuroreceptors are fried.

 

At what point did this resolve for others here?

I can so relate, you're not alone in this -  "normal" anxiety is nothing compared to this anxiety, this anxiety is so intense that it feels physically, it burns inside and it feels like being in a constant state of shock and panic 24/7...with waves of brutal panic attacks.

I'm 15 months off a rapid taper (almost CT) of xanax (I had been on 2-3mg xanax daily for 7-8 years)

and I'm still having this unnatural anxiety although it has been even more intense few months ago if I look back... It's not so harsh and burning now as it used to be. Panic attacks is better also

So it seems to fade very slowly.

 

Is your anxiety in the "background" constant too even during distraction? and do you have the internal shakings/inner vibrations?

how long have you been off the benzos?

 

 

yes this has been exactly what I'm suffering from.

Ugh, me too. Was up for hours worrying about some paperwork thing at work. My stomach drops when the alarm goes off. I actually have to set it earlier to give myself time to breathe through the panic and dread before getting up.

 

The past two days I've gone for an early morning walk. It's helped a little.

It never really resolved for me either. I recall getting more anxious on ativan from almost the very beginning, but havng read so many self-help, psychology and medical books before (many written by doctors), I learned how to attribute benzo side effects as being psychological in nature, and was not able to differentiate between my own anxiety and benzo anxiety. Once I started to see that something else was going on and that I was needing benzos to keep me from beeing incredibly anxious, I knew I was in trouble, but had no idea how to solve it. The doctor at the time knew very little to teach me how to stabilize on these meds. Then, he eventually wrote off all my symptoms as psychological.

 

Getting off has been a slow and long torture, and the anxiety I had before benzos was significant, but not even close to this level of terror and suffering.

 

Things have still not resolved. Been agoraphobic since 2015. 2014 was the last year when I had any sort of normalcy in my life, still. Feeling like I've set up camp on Planet Fear since 2015. No matter how much I try to stay hopeful and upbeat, it is just unrelenting, this chemical fear.

It never really resolved for me either. I recall getting more anxious on ativan from almost the very beginning, but havng read so many self-help, psychology and medical books before (many written by doctors), I learned how to attribute benzo side effects as being psychological in nature, and was not able to differentiate between my own anxiety and benzo anxiety. Once I started to see that something else was going on and that I was needing benzos to keep me from beeing incredibly anxious, I knew I was in trouble, but had no idea how to solve it. The doctor at the time knew very little to teach me how to stabilize on these meds. Then, he eventually wrote off all my symptoms as psychological.

 

Getting off has been a slow and long torture, and the anxiety I had before benzos was significant, but not even close to this level of terror and suffering.

 

Things have still not resolved. Been agoraphobic since 2015. 2014 was the last year when I had any sort of normalcy in my life, still. Feeling like I've set up camp on Planet Fear since 2015. No matter how much I try to stay hopeful and upbeat, it is just unrelenting, this chemical fear.

 

I couldn't have summed it up better myself, this is a great explanation and I highly relate.

Anxiety has been a major problem for me post benzos, and it’s pretty much all was there (except the occasional window). Sometimes my anxiety finds a thought to latch onto, sometimes it’s just free floating anxiety, I don’t even know why it’s there but it’s there. I think mostly my brain tries to make sense of the anxiety by trying to attribute it to something, even though it was there before I thought of anything anxiety provoking. I’ve become mildly agoraphobic, I can leave my house, but I only like going to a few familiar places, anywhere else makes me too uncomfortable. I keep worrying I’ll be fired from my part time job or I’ll be evicted, even though there’s no evidence for it. I just worry and worry. So sick of this, I don’t have a life anymore, don’t go out, don’t socialise much at all, don’t date, don’t do anything

Anxiety has been a major problem for me post benzos, and it’s pretty much all was there (except the occasional window). Sometimes my anxiety finds a thought to latch onto, sometimes it’s just free floating anxiety, I don’t even know why it’s there but it’s there. I think mostly my brain tries to make sense of the anxiety by trying to attribute it to something, even though it was there before I thought of anything anxiety provoking.

Same here, exactly!  Every day I attribute my anxiety to some situation or life circumstance.  But on close objective examination, none of these external factors could be the cause of such constant intense anxiety, brain fog, tinnitus, etc.  The common denominator in all this is benzo withdrawal!  -Jeff

Anxiety has been a major problem for me post benzos, and it’s pretty much all was there (except the occasional window). Sometimes my anxiety finds a thought to latch onto, sometimes it’s just free floating anxiety, I don’t even know why it’s there but it’s there. I think mostly my brain tries to make sense of the anxiety by trying to attribute it to something, even though it was there before I thought of anything anxiety provoking.

Same here, exactly!  Every day I attribute my anxiety to some situation or life circumstance.  But on close objective examination, none of these external factors could be the cause of such constant intense anxiety, brain fog, tinnitus, etc.  The common denominator in all this is benzo withdrawal!  -Jeff

 

So true! When I try to relax I can even track my thoughts some as they search for any potential source of stress, and then fixate on it. I'm doing what I can to cope, but mostly that just means trying to maintain perspective when I know the way I'm thinking and feeling is blowing stuff out of proportion.

Me also.  Sometimes it actually causes by Blood Pressure to jump up by 30 points or more and then brings on a string of palpitations.  It's strange that it sometimes comes out of nowhere its like a burst of adrenaline.  It can happen anytime middle of night while sleeping or day time.  The BP is not jumping as much as early in recovery.  Good Luck All!

Can relate to all the responses in this post... anyone found things that make it help or things that make it worse?

 

I find if i try and treat it like normal anxiety and try to push myself to do things it just makes it worse.

 

If i wrap my nervous system in cotton wool, it seems to make it a bit better over time.

 

Does exercise make this 'unnatural anxiety' better or worse for you all also?

I think pushing myself makes it worse.  As far as exercise, I can't do anything aerobic; mostly long walks.  -Jeff

My own experience as well! Before, anxiety was really mild. A little tension. A little heaviness. Now, just the slightest stress is like a hacksaw. I’m not on the verge of panic but certainly, I do feel extremely different.

 

Stress used to be a lemony feeling in the stomache and when life gives you lemons, I could make lemonade.

 

But now that lemony feeling is more like sulphuric acid! It burns!!

Same with me. It is like anxiety on steroids and then add 10 pots of coffee. I can barely take it anymore. Always worrying and scared, from the minute I wake up until I get my couple hours of broken sleep at night. Wake up in terror and repeat.  Torture!!!!!

My PDOC diagnosed that my brain stem randomly fires fight/flight signals, so I am often in a continual state of anxiety, or I am awakened at night in a full panic attack. In order to keep my body from the wear and tear of the constant adrenalin and cortisol that this state produces, I take very low dose beta blockers (10 mg) as needed (not constantly).  This is an old blood pressure medication, is non-addictive, is NOT a psychogenic drug of any kind and works by blocking the receptor sites that bind with adrenalin. Once taken, the heart rate slows down to normal, the cold sweats stop, muscle trembling stops, and all the other nasty side effects of the adrenalin are eliminated. My mind may still be experiencing anxiety, but at least my body is getting a reprieve from it. I often recommend low dose beta blockers (Propranolol, Inderal) to many people here as something to discuss with their physicians. Often, when you can get your body to quiet down, it is then easier to get conscious control over your mind in relation to the anxiety. This at least has been my experience.