Hope to inspire

I thought for many months that drugs would be part of our daughter's life forever - it was hard to see how all this would stop.  She had tried many drugs, XTC, Ketamine and then finally Xanax. 

We had an awful time - it has been a living hell - I could not see how my daughter would stop this dreadful habit and I know that she reached several low points.  In fact she has admitted to me that she took enough paracetamol to kill herself a few months back.  Lucky for her, her body rejected them and she was sick almost instantly but she had not wanted to wake up - this was not a cry for help, this was it.

I have loved her unconditionally, been calm and given advice even when it was not absorbed most of the time, I have been patient and found strength only because I know that without me, our daughter had no chance at all to get through this.

We learned along the way that our daughter would respond best if she took some steps herself so had to wait patiently in the wings for her to make a move. 

She was so very very brave and took no help from anyone and 'jumped' from Xanax to nothing and went cold turkey.  This was a dreadful, dreadful time and we were aware at any time that she could have suffered a seizure and died.  I watched her like I watched her when when was a wee tiny baby, every minute of the day and night.

Our daughter has now been drug free for nearly two months.  She has opened up and talked with me about everything - we have talked for hours and hours and little by little we have seen our beautiful little girl emerge day by day.

We are not out of the woods yet, she has some social issues as she is pretty house bound at the moment but she is safe and protected and loved here under our roof.  I can see we shall be able to mend these other issues as the nasty living hell of drugs is put behind us.  She feels stronger every day and even feels stronger about some of the triggers (being bullied was one of them) that took her down this dreadful path in the first place.  She has matured and sees the world in a different way and I hope she might even go on to help others one day who struggle with this demon. 

Keep strong all you lovely families and friends who are helping a special person go through this hell - they can do it and you can be strong for them - feel it in your heart x

 

Thank you from the bottom of my heart for sharing. I know if my mom was alive she would be right by my side. You are a great mom and your daughter is blessed to have you. I am sure you feel blessed to have her also. This is very encouraging just to see the love from one person to another.

I feel inspired for sure; tears in my eyes, even. I had issues with opiates prior to being prescribed benzos. Had my parents not stood by me and helped take care of me in my mid-twenties, I don't know what kind of shape I would've been in. Bless you for being her beacon of light. Thank you so much for sharing.

Tinka,

 

Your post has been very healing for me... Thank you so much for sharing your daughter's story. What a wonderful mother you are, and how blessed you and your daughter to have each other!

 

I had been neglected and abused as a child, and hence ended up poly-drugged on psychiatric medication. During my final withdrawal, when I realised what had happened in my childhood, I was rejected and abandoned by both parents. Had it not been for the care of my husband, I would have died, as I was very, very sick and also in severe shock, pain and grief from the betrayal and trauma of it all.

 

To know that the kind of unconditional love you and your daughter share, exists - this in itself is healing for those of us in recovery from abuse and trauma. I've learnt that, even though I did not have that kind of love from my parents, it exists, it is real, it is beautiful...and because of that, I will learn to parent and love myself well, and will be whole again.

 

Wishing your daughter a full recovery, and your family a lifetime of love and precious memories!

 

With heartfelt gratitude,

Lara