13 Months

Yesterday was my 13 month anniversary off of a 4 year (doctor prescribed) use of Ativan.  This is remarkable and frustrating that this takes so long.  I have noticed my nausea is a bit less than it was even a month ago but still pretty prevalent.  Sleep is an issue now - I am trying hard to taper off of a low dose of mirtzapine 3.75 mg that just seemed to not work anymore and that may be adding to my symptoms.  I have added tryptophan at night and it does help me get @6-7 hours for which I am thankful.  Unfortunately some things have gotten worse (or at least it feels like it).  Anxiety has been very difficult and a low grade depression has settled in.  It is so hard to believe that at 13 months that the anxiety can still be so intense for me.  My PDoc and  Therapist who have been great have both told me that they truly believe that this is still benzo withdrawal and have no reason to guess it is something else.  I am glad I have two docs who believe this -  it is me that is having the hard time even at 13 months to believe this.    I don't want to leave this on a negative note however.  My cog fog is gone which has been great.  I can think much more clear.  Head pressure that I used to have is in the past too.  Headaches which I used to have frequently have let up as well.  Keep the faith buddies!

 

Hi SoulMan. I am just a bit ahead of you at fifteen months and share in your frustrations. Last week I felt almost healed and here I am again in another horrible wave . It is what it is 

I came of my 3.75 mg remeron about three months ago and I'm still feeling the bounce from a very abrupt taper. The good thing is that now I am med .free . The bad thing is that like you I am weary from the never ending battle and insomnia just makes everything worse.

There is an excellent remeron support board for you to go to for help with your issues. Remeron can be a beast to taper from.

 

Good luck. One day we will be done , and I really believe that the road gets easier.

Thank you Brave Rabbitt. Really appreciate that.

Keep pushing forward, you wont have much longer to go. Im 10.5 and feeling good again but i know Ill feel like shit sooner or later till these waves go away forever! Are you able to work?

Thanks for posting and letting us know how are you doing. May I ask you how much Tryptophan are you taking, when, what brand? I am debating whether I should start taking it or not. I am two months off my jump and I am struggling with insomnia. You are sleeping 6-7hrs which is great. Did this beging when you started the tryptophan or does it take some time to kick in? Your insights will be greatly appreciated. God bless and wish you a full recovery 

Hi BeatBenzos. Thanks and yes still working but a lot of days are challenging.  I get myself up and going and the distraction is good.  Plus, I have lot and lots of responsibilities at home and I just have to work.  Solylna - thank you also.  I just started trytophan @3 weeks ago.  I started with the NOW brand and have switched to Superior Labs.  I take 2 (500 mg) pills.  One in the mid to late afternoon and 1 about a 1/2 hour before bed.

Thank you SoulMan, I will try the triptophan (hope I don't get any side effects from it). I wish I could take a test to find out which neurotransmitters I am deficient. I know that with the taper I am deficient on Gaba, but most likely serotonin as well, dopanime, etc    Some people in this forum follow the Ashton Manual right down to the tee which encourages no supplements; I wonder myself? I will try though.

 

Have a blesssed day