2 months off Ativan

Just about 2 months off relatively short term ativan use(details in signature)

 

First month was surprisingly ok. The 1st week was completely fine. I was worried about travelling from Canada to Ireland but it was fine. I was worried Christmas might be overwhelming and exhausting but again it was fine and I actually enjoyed parts of it. Symptoms were limited for the most part, some headaches, fatigues and heart/chest pains. My anxiety, which was always my main issue, didn’t bother me at all. I actually though I had escaped unfazed.

 

2nd month was pretty bad. I started getting depression. Then my anxiety came roaring back, for seemingly no reason. That sucked pretty hard. Never ending tremors. Had days with really bad depersonalization and have been waking up with horrible brain fog. Sometimes it’s hard making breakfast. Most recently I’ve started feeling like I’m on a boat. Asides from eating times and exercise I spend most of my time in bed, although I wouldn’t say I’m bed ridden, I just feel off most of the time and don’t have motivation to do stuff.

 

The good: I’m still sleeping consistently and have done so throughout the process. Mostly 7-8 hours every night. The odd early wake up but not that common.

 

I’m still able to exercise. I’m doing a good 30 minutes every day. Sometimes more. I don’t always feel good afterwards but it doesn’t seem to effect me that much.

 

I’m learning piano, I’m hoping this may help my brain. But it’s fun eitherway.

 

 

I’m guessing the fact I’m sleeping and able to exercise means I’m probably not in acute? This is just quite a rough period. I was on a low dose and for quite a short period and I thought I tapered well for my useage times.

 

If anyone has any experience/advice/knowledge they want to pass on that would be great. I’ve appreciated the wisdom from many folks on here who have come out the otherside.

 

I'm 45 days out.  I feel your pain.  I tapered fairly rapidly as I was a short term user.  The first week was fine but started having anxiety symptoms/adrenaline rushes in the morning.  They have been off and on and the worst symptom.  I had most of the symptoms over the past few weeks but not as bad as the cold turkey/ tapering symptoms.  I am sleeping well..ish.  I go to bed around 7:30 because I always wake up at 4:30am.  I only sleep an couple of hours at a time.  My sleep now is 2-3 hours at a time and it seems to be a deeper sleep.  Before it was hard to tell if I slept at all even though I was dreaming.  All and all, I'm thankful for the minimal symptoms I have although the anxiety is still tough.  Not sure what normal is anymore..lol.  I just deal with it day to day.  Some days aren't bad at all recently although I'm having trouble being happy. Even though I sleep, I feel really tired and worn out.  I try and stay busy with projects and chalk it up to chemical imbalance for a while.  I know everyone on here has problems that are tough to deal with but I also see eventually everyone improves with time.  I try and focus on doing and feeling my best today and let the future take care of itself.  I can't change how I feel right now but I can try and be as positive as possible on my part.  I also try and eat healthy.  I didn't realize MSG was in so many foods.  It is listed by so many different names.  After the 3rd week I stopped MSG totally and it does seem to help me I believe.  Worst symptoms right now are the morning cortisol/anxiety, mind fog, ear ringing, scared feeling in my chest like something bad is about to happen, heightened sense...I can smell what my neighbors are having for dinner and hear their conversation..lol, altered sense of colors..like an amber/vintage picture, some boaty feelings but not as bad as taper.  All of this sucks but it is not as bad as the taper and the first weeks.  I am working every day and just do the best I can.  I check myself 2 or 3 times to make sure I did everything but still am not sharp by any means.  I just keep in mind...this is how I feel today and deal with it.  Tomorrow, I'll deal with tomorrow and one day, it will be a memory.  People with anxieties are some of the strongest people I know.  We are the best actors in the world.  We deal with things that would bring other people to their knees.  We will get through this.  It's always good to have a community of others who are dealing with the same issues.  You are not alone.  Hope some part of this helps someone as this community has been such a blessing to me.  Doctors are so ignorant of this medicine.  Unreal.  I guess I wouldn't believe it either unless I had been through it.  I am spreading the word about benzos and also floriqualinone antibiotics.  Terrible drugs.  Chin up everyone!!  We will get through this!!

For sure thanks.

 

One thing I forgot to mention. I have heard supplements can rev up symptoms. What about supplementing vitamin D? I live in Ireland and its February so you can imagine its hard to get enough naturally.

My sister lives in cyprus where it is always warm and sunny, she said I can stay with her for as long as I want. I'm tempted but I have a good doctor here and its comforting being close to her. Do you think the improvement I get from being in a sunny climate would be worth it?

It’s the only one I haven’t tried. I use melatonin, vitamin C, fish oil, and zinc. Decaf green tea as I can’t tolerate decaf coffee. I really miss the coffee. I bought some vitamin D3 but haven’t tried it yet. Let me know if it works for you.

The sun always makes things better. Family is good too. We all need support.