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DP/DR Support group


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I feel for each of you, I truly do. I read your posts and they're heartbreaking to think about. The DP/DR is almost as debilitating as the boaty symptoms for me, and all of it is causing BP and HR spikes for me every day. My chest pain has gotten worse, too, so I'm seeing a cardiologist next week for a work-up. I'm also hoping to get in with a neurologist soon because I really don't know how I can take this much longer, and I'm only in the middle of month 4 right now. Every time I remember that I've had to quit my job, it makes me feel like none of this could possibly be real. And instead of helping to distract you, does watching anything except a documentary or news on TV make your DP/DR even worse?

 

Thinking of all of you every day...

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This is the worst symptom ever.  For anyone worried about it, it does go away and when it does it totally does.  This is one of those symproms where you can’t imagine what being normal feels like, and that once you have experienced dpdr you can’t unsee it.  But let me assure you when it leaves your mind goes totally back to normal.  I had a 10 mo full window from it and it just came back in this wave at 25mo. Out.  It doesn’t scare me as much this time since I’ve been to the other side.  That being said, I still have some fear of it not going away.  Nature of the beast.
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Before up dosing and holding on my taper I was almost in a 2 year window, I thought I was lucky tapering off 10mgs xanax no sxs... then one day at work it all hit me. That was almost a year ago. I saw my doctor yesterday he said I'm still withdrawing from the 10mgs, even at half my body is noticing the difference.  All I can think is I had been on 10mgs so long it took my brain longer to realize I was tapering. I had a good say yesterday. I asked for celexa 10mgs well the generic of it, I've read it can help with DR . Also there is a lot of good about lamictal m but I'm terrified of meds. My doc gave me 5 1mg kolopin to try, he said try it in place of my xanax. He said he doesn't think it will do much but is willing to try. My fear is it ell work better cause I'll still have xanax in my system. Currently taking my xanax every 3 and a half hours to avoid interdose panicand try to manage the DR.

 

Has anyone had luck with emdr therapy

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Ajusta

 

That is awesome  :thumbsup: I have been having windows at night once everyone is asleep, I've found myself actually just enjoying relaxing watching tv. Not constantly thinking is this a dream

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[b0...]
I can't take this depersonalization anymore! I have lived with DP/DR for years at this point but lately it is all encompassing. I will be talking to people and it's like I don't even feel like they're in the same room as me. It sends me into states of utter terror. This side effect is horrible. I tell myself over and over that it isn't dangerous but the fear never leaves and I can't distract anymore. I constantly feel like I'm on the verge of completely losing my sanity. That fear of losing control is so difficult to get over especially in uncontrollable situations like being a passenger in a car or waiting in line. Anything like that makes me want to just tear my hair out and run around screaming.
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[b0...]
It's been bad for a while but ever since my reinstatement after my failed taper in November of 2016 followed shortly by my failed attempt to crossover to Valium it's reached a whole new level where I'm afraid to leave my bed. Hell I don't even feel safe IN my bed. I feel like I'm being tortured.
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Hi everyone. Thought I’d start following the group because dp/dr has been one of my worst symptoms for months now. It truly is horrible.
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Its my worst symptom. Feels like Im robbed of my personality and all contact with my surroundings. Never had a full window of this. Lately it waves a bit in severity, but it wont leave. Feeling a bit better in this and then its taken away again is brutal.
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I had my first window from this for about an hour yesterday.

 

It was such a relief.

 

What did it feel like? Please describe it so I have something to anticipate. I'm heading into month 5 and it's gotten worse in the past two months. This is the feeling that makes me think I might be having a psychotic break. I'm still going from bed>couch>bed every single day. :o

 

Thank you, Ajusta.

 

 

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It was just like I was in the world in an ordinary way again.

 

Still had the horrid unreality in relation to my body but the world outside me looked normal and familiar. I felt like I was in the world again.

 

It comes and goes.

 

It is definately made worse by anxiety.

 

If I can manage go do some deep relaxation and stay very very calm I am in tbe world in a normal way.

 

As soon as I feel frightened or think about this going on and on and never recovering it gets worse.

 

Any tiny bit of stress makes it worse which is very hard because muscle problems mean it is very hard gor me to get into a position to relax in.

 

Listening go very calming choral music seems to help as does guided relaxation.

 

Sometimes it only last a few minutes but that reassures me it is possible.

 

 

 

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I agree with all of you, DP is by far one of the worst symptoms I have suffered with throughout this withdrawal journey.  It is so hard to describe to someone who hasn't gone through this hell.  I am here to tell you though, it will go away.  There is no set time frame when it will go away.  For some it last only a few days others go for months.  I was one in the latter.  I still feel it, occasionally.  Stress makes it worse, meditation makes it better.  Exercising has helped me too.  Walks in nature is good also.  Wishing you all a healing day.  Be gentle with yourself.  You will heal, trust that. 
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Oddly enough started to smoke weed again, only 2 or 3 hits off a bowl and it's helped so much.

 

Weed makes my DP/DR so much worse. It have started couple of long serious next level waves for me also.

 

But I am so glad it helps you!

 

Exercising have helped me a little. Also good food and other basic things. Sometimes it hits so hard that nothing helps. It is not a good thing if I can't sleep. Hell on earth. Stress is maybe the worst.

 

I'm glad that I found this. Thank you everybody.

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Following this group. DR is probably my worst symptom. It’s just the one I cannot cope with. I’ve seen some lessening since the early days but it’s still pretty troublesome. I really don’t know how much of it is a visual symptom? I’ve got DR and visual issues tag teaming my outlook on my surroundings.

 

Arkansas- thanks for your encouraging words.

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[b0...]
Do you guys have really bad short term memory that goes along with the DP/DR too? I forget things that literally just happened and it constantly freaked me out and makes me feel more dissociated.
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Is your DP/DR like this?

 

It is like I am watching myself  outside. I am inside my body, but I start to have "doubts" is it me, or I feel so separate from my body, and stuff like that.

 

Now I have kinda doubts is this even dp/dr or am I hallucinating or something.

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It was just like I was in the world in an ordinary way again.

 

Still had the horrid unreality in relation to my body but the world outside me looked normal and familiar. I felt like I was in the world again.

 

It comes and goes.

 

It is definately made worse by anxiety.

 

If I can manage go do some deep relaxation and stay very very calm I am in tbe world in a normal way.

 

As soon as I feel frightened or think about this going on and on and never recovering it gets worse.

 

Any tiny bit of stress makes it worse which is very hard because muscle problems mean it is very hard gor me to get into a position to relax in.

 

Listening go very calming choral music seems to help as does guided relaxation.

 

Sometimes it only last a few minutes but that reassures me it is possible.

 

Thanks, Ajusta, I haven't replied bc I don't have better news. And I'm confused about whether this WD/Recovery is my fault bc I'm not doing more to help myself (bed>couch>bed every day) OR whether it's just a matter of time until the windows start to appear and I know I'm really on the road to better. I know I'm early in my journey compared to many others who've gone through a Klonopin CT, but most of what I read from other BBs talks about how their windows have already appeared by Month 5. Hell, I'm still getting new sxs. This DR is enveloping me, especially on days of full rain like we've had now for a while. I really just need any kind of window at all.

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  • 2 weeks later...
Joantics - I completely understand where you are coming from.  I was there, too.  What finally helped me was to stop comparing myself to others.  Give yourself a break and accept that some days you are going to feel worse than others.  Maybe just do some stretching exercises.  Just do what you can do.  These symptoms will pass, new ones will pop up, but remember in time they will pass. Be kind to yourself.  :-*
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Thanks, Ajusta, I haven't replied bc I don't have better news. And I'm confused about whether this WD/Recovery is my fault bc I'm not doing more to help myself (bed>couch>bed every day) OR whether it's just a matter of time until the windows start to appear and I know I'm really on the road to better. I know I'm early in my journey compared to many others who've gone through a Klonopin CT, but most of what I read from other BBs talks about how their windows have already appeared by Month 5. Hell, I'm still getting new sxs. This DR is enveloping me, especially on days of full rain like we've had now for a while. I really just need any kind of window at all.

 

It is in no way your fault!

 

I haven't had another window like that one since.

 

I think it's completely random.

 

For me the depersonalisation is worse than the derealisation. My body doesn't feel solid or real. It feels numb and as if it is made of plastuc.

 

Having said that the world feels unreal in terms of touch. Mybsense of touch and physicality is very badly affected.

 

It's very frightening.

 

I do think time and luck seem to be the on factors for this. I am hoping a low glutamate diet will help. Iam mostly bedridden and trying to accept that helps a bit but is very hard.

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