Is it better?

Is it better to just exist within these symptoms, day in and day out, with no promise of healing b/c every day brings about it's own set of horrors....My days are spent lying flat on my back-too afraid to move sometime...feeling all of the emotions wash over me....extreme depression, mental anguish, panic, anxiety,  and then the physical of sore tongue, odd feelings in hands/feet...I just can't cope with it anymore...I am worn down...I sit with my computer most days and this is no life....my brain can't even help me find joy....I've become prisoner to this daily war and I'm losing...see no way through

Hardtocope:

 

Please realize there are many of us here who could have written what you did plus or minus here and there.  This definitely sucks!  I HATE IT!  We are all here for you and you aren't alone.  I spend some days in bed-i know others like yourself who isolate to their room or house day after day.  I am so sorry you are having a difficult time.  I am not trying to offend but have you been outside today and felt the suns warmth envelope you?  Do you have pets?  They can be of immense support and therapeutic.  I read one post of a lady who walked her house and counted the steps-that's all she had and all she could do. 

Really what is our alternative-putting the poison back in our bodies?  I've been tempted but can't do that to myself or family.  I apologize if my words didn't come out right or offended-not my intent.  I really do sympathize.  I know we can all beat this!  You can PM me anytime (if I haven't scared you off).

Thank you; You haven't offended at all. I think that my posts are knee-jerk reactions to what I'm experiencing at the moment and I just put it out there...hating to get others down...I think it's just a release to be able to write it all down. I have a pet but he's a little depressed these days b/c I don't take him out much...I have the derealization so as soon as I go out, I come right back in. Believe me, I've tried most everything I can think of to cope with this...I think I just get frustrated...thanks for your comments..

Hardtocope,

I could have written that too....understand. Try to walk daily and pick a special food or activity for the next day something to look forward to.

Drink lots of water ! Lemon water tastes better.

Distract from your systems, try not to read to much about Benzo withdrawal if it makes you

more depressed.

Set outside and watch the birds and clouds.

 

Iwishiknew,

I agree 100% Thank you !  I needed to read your post.

Blessing and healing to each of us.

 

Thank you Never take a Benzo....I think I just have so many road blocks to coping...like going outside-it's hard b/c I have the fears and feeling so off outside...then water of all things, I've developed an aversion to and don't drink near enough...I try to distract but the feelings are all over me...I appreciate the suggestions though-operating in panic mode 24/7

Hardtocope:

I'm relieved I didn't offend you-it's hard when you aren't face to face to know how your words will be interpreted.  I do apologize I didn't realized about the DP and going outside.  But just to stand at the door and look outside  if even from a window might help-or opening a window.  If your pet is inside-you could help him by living on him/her.  If a dog-maybe brush him.  Just thoughts...

You are definitely on my mind-all my Benzo. Buddies are.  Sending good thoughts your way. 

Thank you...it's okay....I realize how hard this is for everyone...I'm 44 and should be able to manage this better but it's just screwed my brain up so badly, it's hard to navigate my way through...the fear is unreal...thanks again for the encouragement.

Hardtocope,

I understand about going outside, I'm more comfortable in my room looking out the window.

Do what you can do and take it hour by hour. Praying for your recovery.

Trust me it will get better.

Blessing to you.

look up the symptoms of dehydration some can be similar.. maybe if you were better hydrated somethings might feel better?! I dunno its worth a shot. I can say its def not going to hurt anything. Try flavor water?

Thank you Meems and Never take a Benzo...

 

Meems-I hadn't considered that; I'm so not drinking as much these days...couldn't hurt to try more...thanks

I like lemon water--> 1 lemon per large glass of water.

Thank you; I don't know what it is..I guess it's shock for me as I lie flat on my back daily and cry; failing to drink...I eat, though not as much...maybe I'm willing myself to die....thank you for the suggestion

Drinking lots of water helps me feel better. Still not normal but better.

We are healing each day try to eat and stay hydrated !

Sending you healing thoughts.

Thank you; I'm so bound by my negative thinking that all I do all day is volley back and forth about what to do (as if there's anything)...I struggle with the compulsion of wanting to take something though I know there is nothing...thank you again for your kindness..

I did the same trying to find something to take to feel better. End up trying Tylenol several times. I don't think it helped but mentally it gave me some comfort. 

Wishing all sweet sleep if we can ever really go to sleep. 

Thank you

I have been following your posts and I must put this out there....do you actually try any of the things suggested to you? You respond to each and every post, but do you try the things suggested? It seems you do not, so maybe you should force yourself to do one thing a day. Force yourself to sit on a lawn chair outside and brush your dog, make some lemonade and drink it one day, get up out of bed and stay off the computer for a few hours and live life. You are not dying of cancer or anything so dramatic. I went through this benzo w/d hell, too. I, too, felt horribly depressed and still do some days, but it does get better slowly. You cannot just sit and feel sorry for yourself, you have to try. Think of your mother and son and what they need. Even just seeing a bit of effort from you might cheer THEM up. Maybe making someone else feel good might be a small goal. I am just saying you are feeling awful and we have all been there, but it is not death, and talking about it like it is will not help. Stop reading all the horror stories and make some small attempt to help yourself and slowly things will improve. Guaranteed. Sorry if this offends and I know it will offend some people, if not you. Not meant to offend, just some tough love I guess.

Thank you...I guess I'm feeding off of my fear...I've been in tolerance for a whole year on the meds and now off, suffered the whole time...

AngelWillie-

On spot advice thank-you. I applied it to my journey.

 

Thanks