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Healed after 12 years!


[Mr...]

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Thank you Mr. B

For sharing your story...so glad you won the fight ! thank you for all the advice and your story.

I know you understand about the scared feeling we all have. Sometime I just take a break from this site.

 

Blessings

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[2e...]
Since my own recovery, I have found a peace in my life that I never had before. I now appreciate everything good and bad that life has to offer me. Nothing bothers me at all anymore, and I live and love life to the fullest. This mindset was a gift that this awful drug induced horror has given me.. and I don't regret it, and wouldn't change it for the world.

 

Suffering and recovery can be a great gift, and I believe it means even more to us.. 'the super protracted'. please try to accept and embrace this thought.

 

This thought alone has brought me through some very rough times in the past year. I'm so grateful for your generosity, Mr. B.

 

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I find it pretty unfair the way some members hijacked this success story in order to vent about their situation.  How do you think Mr.B must feel after licking the streets of hell for so long ?

 

If you don't know the difference between a brutal detox vs tapering ....I suggest its time to do your homework.

 

Instead of accusing me of lack of compassion....where is yours for him ?

 

Np.  I removed every comment except for the one I made back in March before my side effects became debilitating. I will not be back and I wish y'all the best in your recovery.  Congrats on your healing.  :-[

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I just realized that even if I make a full recovery, posting it here would likely be met with disbelief and hostility due to my timeline alone :'(

 

No wonder we have so few success stories for severely protracted people on this site. There's no way would I allow anyone to censor the truth of my own experience, given the extreme nature of what I've had to survive. And yet if I do recover, it's also extremely unlikely that I'd have much interest in subjecting myself to negativity and hostility from others, let alone from a community of fellow survivors, simply because my recovery was extremely protracted, severe, and literally disabling.

 

I'm so sad this has happened on one of the only success stories on this entire site that still provides hope and feels at all relevant to me. There are literally hundreds and hundreds of stories on here that can provide hope for a faster recovery, as this is clearly the norm for the vast majority of people. For those of us who got hit much harder than others and are taking much longer to heal, this is one of only a tiny handful of stories that can still provide us with hope (including those who are your age or older, Raquel). We need more protracted success stories, as there are very few to be found anywhere. No one will bother to come back and write them if this is the response they are met with. Please have compassion and empathy for those whose injury was extensive. Don't take away hope for recovery from those who have so little left.

 

If this story bothers you, please discuss it elsewhere. Do not diminish the heroic recovery of Mr. B and others who hope to be like him. This is a true success story, and a place for celebration and hope for <i>all</i> of us, not just some of us.

 

I sincerely hope this doesn't deter Mr. B from leaving another update, as I truly look forward to them....

 

What a beautiful and touching post.  Thank you and may you get well soon Mutuuraia and everyone of course.  :smitten:

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I just realized that even if I make a full recovery, posting it here would likely be met with disbelief and hostility due to my timeline alone :'(

 

No wonder we have so few success stories for severely protracted people on this site. There's no way would I allow anyone to censor the truth of my own experience, given the extreme nature of what I've had to survive. And yet if I do recover, it's also extremely unlikely that I'd have much interest in subjecting myself to negativity and hostility from others, let alone from a community of fellow survivors, simply because my recovery was extremely protracted, severe, and literally disabling.

 

I'm so sad this has happened on one of the only success stories on this entire site that still provides hope and feels at all relevant to me. There are literally hundreds and hundreds of stories on here that can provide hope for a faster recovery, as this is clearly the norm for the vast majority of people. For those of us who got hit much harder than others and are taking much longer to heal, this is one of only a tiny handful of stories that can still provide us with hope (including those who are your age or older, Raquel). We need more protracted success stories, as there are very few to be found anywhere. No one will bother to come back and write them if this is the response they are met with. Please have compassion and empathy for those whose injury was extensive. Don't take away hope for recovery from those who have so little left.

 

If this story bothers you, please discuss it elsewhere. Do not diminish the heroic recovery of Mr. B and others who hope to be like him. This is a true success story, and a place for celebration and hope for <i>all</i> of us, not just some of us.

 

I sincerely hope this doesn't deter Mr. B from leaving another update, as I truly look forward to them....

 

What a beautiful and touching post.  Thank you and may you get well soon Mutuuraia and everyone of course.  :smitten:

 

I so agree, I love the protracted members. There are so many kind, compassionate, intelligent and thoughtful individuals who make up the protracted community. I practically like every single one of us, myself included. I can't even think of one protracted member I take issue with or find offensive... I love all of us and I wish us all strength, fortitude, solidarity and even more recovery than we imagined or thought possible.

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This is an amazing story, it really gives me hope. I had protracted withdrawal for five years and couldn't handle it. I really see that good support systems are helpful. I wish there were some form of AA for this.
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  • 4 weeks later...

12 Years A Slave.

 

Now healed. I'm sure it's like finding home after being lost for years. I'm happy for you. Really!!! But sad too cause im still stuck on the dark side.  I yearn for your relief of mental symptoms like how the rich man trapped in the flames of hell begged Lazarus to dip his fingers in water and give him the drop of water.

 

Congrats and enjoy your life far away from this hell. God bless 🙏🏽

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  • 4 weeks later...
Not sure how I havent seen this before but damn I needed to read this. Back in hell at 7 years off after a long window thinking i was out of the woods. Glad your healed and thanks for coming back to tell your story.
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  • 2 weeks later...

I don’t know of any other ‘severe’ protracted success stories, past 10 years off. Mr B is the only one I know of who has come back within the last few years, not sure if there are older stories of this kind.

 

I’ve been off for over 11 years, much better, almost fully functional but not there yet. I hope to recover completely within the next year or two.

 

I wrote a success story before, when I was 4 or 5 years off, but it was premature. I had a severe setback starting at 7.5 years off.

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7.5 years for me. I guess if anyone could claim "protracted" it would be me. I choose not to see it that way. I DO still have symptoms that only started in my cold turkey wd. But they are, what I consider, minor. I ignores them. They come and go and do NOT affect how I do my work, either at home or elsewhere. Because my cold turkey was truly so bad, I just feel relieved now, knowing ai do function normally. I find this trulty wonderful now. I have come SO far.

If one is able to function almost normally, I would suggest that you focus ONLY on what is positive, and NOT focus on stuff you think is benzo related. You cannot change that stuff, so why worry about it? You ARE who you are today, for better or worse.

Arent you feeling better OFF benzos??? I sure do. Oh God, I sure do.

east

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I don’t know of any other ‘severe’ protracted success stories, past 10 years off. Mr B is the only one I know of who has come back within the last few years, not sure if there are older stories of this kind.

 

I’ve been off for over 11 years, much better, almost fully functional but not there yet. I hope to recover completely within the next year or two.

 

I wrote a success story before, when I was 4 or 5 years off, but it was premature. I had a severe setback starting at 7.5 years off.

 

At 7.5 years what type of set back have you endured?  Did the symptoms go away slowly or was it a quick bounce back?

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7.5 years for me. I guess if anyone could claim "protracted" it would be me. I choose not to see it that way.

 

 

Nope...no way Annie....you were lucky.

Why don't you join the section and find out for yourself ?

 

 

 

 

 

 

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I don’t know of any other ‘severe’ protracted success stories, past 10 years off. Mr B is the only one I know of who has come back within the last few years, not sure if there are older stories of this kind.

 

I’ve been off for over 11 years, much better, almost fully functional but not there yet. I hope to recover completely within the next year or two.

 

I wrote a success story before, when I was 4 or 5 years off, but it was premature. I had a severe setback starting at 7.5 years off.

 

 

 

At 7.5 years what type of set back have you endured?  Did the symptoms go away slowly or was it a quick bounce back?

 

It was back to acute symptoms, mental and physical, some new and some old. They started to go away very slowly over the last 4 years.

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  • 3 weeks later...

 

7.5 years for me. I guess if anyone could claim "protracted" it would be me. I choose not to see it that way.

 

 

Nope...no way Annie....you were lucky.

Why don't you join the section and find out for yourself ?

 

Didn’t see this reply until now.  ❤️

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I made a clear decision not to consider myself "protracted." I went through a cold turkey from hell. I struggled and struggled to get through it. Finally, I was able to function in a normal sort of way.

What I later realized is that I still had more healing to do...at 3 years, and at 4 years. Evan at 5 years. I didn't want to say8 this on BB as it would scare some people so badly.

But just because I was fully functionable at 4 years did not mean I was totally healed. That is MY reality. I also think my situation is a bit different, as I so totally abused benzos for thirty damn years. I AM Nurse Jackie.  I just chose to abuse benzos, not narcotics, like that TV nurse did. Or House. I took enormous doses if various benzos every single night. ONLY the last 12 years were they legally prescribed. THAT is my truth. I was forced to go cold turkey and all hell ensued.

But I got through it, with some help from my friends here on BB. It was never easy. It was utter misery, but I somehow sensed what I needed to do. And I did those things, and managed to heal enough to be functional.

But I still had further healing to do. It has now bee 7 years. And I am also sure I may have further healing to do....fine tuning. This does not scare me at all, as I feel so good now. I am happy, I feel love and joy, I no longer depend on benzos.

To to all of you struggling tonight, don't let it get you down. You will heal from this. You will feel good again. If I can, anyone can.

Me, I just chose to NOT seem myself as "protracted." Why? because this is ow I approached benzo wd right from the start. I chose not to see myself as sick or injured. I was  person who took benzos far too long and paid a huge price for that. I decided NOT to see myself as a victim of benzos.

 

Morregg, how the hell was I "lucky"??? If anyone could say they had a bad experience with benzos, it would be me. I don't feel lucky. But I do feel blessed that I sensed how to deal with benzo wd.

east

 

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Morregg, how the hell was I "lucky"??? If anyone could say they had a bad experience with benzos, it would be me. I don't feel lucky.  But I do feel blessed that I sensed how to deal with benzo wd.

east

 

 

Forget it East....my point was about you  joining the section and finding out about the

 

brutal suffering of others. I would have loved to see your advise on there....

never mind. your choice, your opinion....you are one of  the worst cases on BB ?

 

Amen to that if it makes you happy....many of us know better.  :(

 

 

 

 

 

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I made a clear decision not to consider myself "protracted." I went through a cold turkey from hell. I struggled and struggled to get through it. Finally, I was able to function in a normal sort of way.

What I later realized is that I still had more healing to do...at 3 years, and at 4 years. Evan at 5 years. I didn't want to say8 this on BB as it would scare some people so badly.

But just because I was fully functionable at 4 years did not mean I was totally healed. That is MY reality. I also think my situation is a bit different, as I so totally abused benzos for thirty damn years. I AM Nurse Jackie.  I just chose to abuse benzos, not narcotics, like that TV nurse did. Or House. I took enormous doses if various benzos every single night. ONLY the last 12 years were they legally prescribed. THAT is my truth. I was forced to go cold turkey and all hell ensued.

But I got through it, with some help from my friends here on BB. It was never easy. It was utter misery, but I somehow sensed what I needed to do. And I did those things, and managed to heal enough to be functional.

But I still had further healing to do. It has now bee 7 years. And I am also sure I may have further healing to do....fine tuning. This does not scare me at all, as I feel so good now. I am happy, I feel love and joy, I no longer depend on benzos.

To to all of you struggling tonight, don't let it get you down. You will heal from this. You will feel good again. If I can, anyone can.

Me, I just chose to NOT seem myself as "protracted." Why? because this is ow I approached benzo wd right from the start. I chose not to see myself as sick or injured. I was  person who took benzos far too long and paid a huge price for that. I decided NOT to see myself as a victim of benzos.

 

Morregg, how the hell was I "lucky"??? If anyone could say they had a bad experience with benzos, it would be me. I don't feel lucky. But I do feel blessed that I sensed how to deal with benzo wd.

east

 

:thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup:

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Fallacy (and also “gaslighting” here by you eastcoast62 and Wildflower33.)

 

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fallacy

 

A fallacy is the use of invalid or otherwise faulty reasoning, or "wrong moves"[1] in the construction of an argument.[2][3] A fallacious argument may be deceptive by appearing to be better than it really is. Some fallacies are committed intentionally to manipulate or persuade by deception, while others are committed unintentionally due to carelessness or ignorance. The soundness of legal arguments depends on the context in which the arguments are made.[4]

 

Fallacies are commonly divided into "formal" and "informal". A formal fallacy can be expressed neatly in a standard system of logic, such as propositional logic,[2] while an informal fallacy originates in an error in reasoning other than an improper logical form.[5] Arguments containing informal fallacies may be formally valid, but still fallacious.[6]

 

A special case is a mathematical fallacy, an intentionally invalid mathematical proof, often with the error subtle and somehow concealed. Mathematical fallacies are typically crafted and exhibited for educational purposes, usually taking the form of spurious proofs of obvious contradictions.

 

Informal Fallacy

 

In contrast to a formal fallacy, an informal fallacy originates in a reasoning error other than a flaw in the logical form of the argument.[5] A deductive argument containing an informal fallacy may be formally valid,[6] but still remain rationally unpersuasive. Nevertheless, informal fallacies apply to both deductive and non-deductive arguments.

 

Though the form of the argument may be relevant, fallacies of this type are the "types of mistakes in reasoning that arise from the mishandling of the content of the propositions constituting the argument".[24]

 

Faulty generalization Edit

A special subclass of the informal fallacies is the set of faulty generalizations, also known as inductive fallacies. Here the most important issue concerns inductive strength or methodology (for example, statistical inference). In the absence of sufficient evidence, drawing conclusions based on induction is unwarranted and fallacious. With the backing of empirical evidence, however, the conclusions may become warranted and convincing (at which point the arguments are no longer considered fallacious).[citation needed]

 

Hasty generalization Edit

For instance, hasty generalization is making assumptions about a whole group or range of cases based on a sample that is inadequate (usually because it is atypical or just too small). Stereotypes about people ("frat boys are drunkards", "grad students are nerdy", "women don’t enjoy sports", etc.) are a common example of the principle.

 

Hasty generalisation often follows a pattern such as:

 

X is true for A.

X is true for B.

Therefore, X is true for C, D, etc.

While never a valid logical deduction, if such an inference can be made on statistical grounds, it may nonetheless be convincing. This is because with enough empirical evidence, the generalization is no longer a hasty one.

 

Relevance fallacy Edit

The fallacies of relevance are a broad class of informal fallacies (see the navbox below), generically represented by missing the point: presenting an argument, which may be sound, but fails to address the issue in question.

 

Argumentum ex silentio Edit

An argument from silence features an unwarranted conclusion advanced based on the absence of data.

 

Examples of informal fallacies Edit

Main article: List of fallacies § Informal fallacies

Post hoc (false cause) Edit

This fallacy gets its name from the Latin phrase "post hoc, ergo propter hoc," which translates as "after this, therefore because of this." Definition: Assuming that because B comes after A, A caused B. Sometimes one event really does cause another one that comes later—for example, if I register for a class, and my name later appears on the roll, it's true that the first event caused the one that came later. But sometimes two events that seem related in time aren't really related as cause and event. That is, temporal correlation doesn't necessarily entail causation.

 

Slippery slope Edit

Definition: The arguer claims that a sort of chain reaction, usually ending in some dire consequence, will take place, but in fact there is not enough evidence for that assumption. The arguer asserts that if we take even one step onto the "slippery slope," we will end up sliding all the way to the bottom; they assume we can't stop halfway down the hill.[25]

 

False analogy Edit

This error in reasoning occurs when claims are supported by unsound comparisons, hence the false analogy's informal nickname of the "apples and oranges" fallacy.[26]

 

...

 

Gaslighting

 

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gaslighting

 

Gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation in which a person seeks to sow seeds of doubt in a targeted individual or in members of a targeted group, making them question their own memory, perception, or sanity. Using denial, misdirection, contradiction, and lying, gaslighting involves attempts to destabilize the victim and delegitimize the victim's beliefs.[1][2]

 

Instances may range from the denial by an abuser that previous abusive incidents ever occurred to the staging of bizarre events by the abuser with the intention of disorientating the victim. The term originated from the 1938 Patrick Hamilton play Gas Light and its 1940 and 1944 film adaptations (both titled Gaslight), in which a character tries to make his wife believe that she has gone insane to cover his criminal activities. When he turns up the gas-fueled lights in the upstairs apartment in order to search for a murdered woman's jewels, the gaslights in his own apartment grow dimmer but he convinces his wife that she is imagining the change. The term has been used in clinical and research literature, as well as in political commentary.[3]:31–46[4][5][6]

 

Gaslighting In Psychiatry

 

Gaslighting has been observed between patients and staff in inpatient psychiatric facilities.[21]

 

In a 1981 article, "Some Clinical Consequences of Introjection: Gaslighting", psychoanalysts Victor Calef and Edward Weinshel argued that gaslighting involves the projection and introjection of psychic conflicts from the perpetrator to the victim: "this imposition is based on a very special kind of 'transfer' ... of potentially painful mental conflicts."[22] The authors explored a variety of reasons why the victims may have "a tendency to incorporate and assimilate what others externalize and project onto them", and concluded that gaslighting may be "a very complex highly structured configuration which encompasses contributions from many elements of the psychic apparatus."[22] Psychiatrist Theodore Dorpat (1994) described this as an example of projective identification.[2]

 

In a 1996 book, Dorpat claimed that "gaslighting and other methods of interpersonal control are widely used by mental health professionals as well as other people" because they are effective methods for shaping the behavior of other individuals.[3]:45 Gaslighting depends on "first convincing the victim that his thinking is distorted and secondly persuading him that the victimizer's ideas are the correct and true ones."[3]:45

 

...

 

And if I were to use the foul language I see both of you use all around this website, I’d shame you by saying something like: “knock off the ‘negative’ language and behavior, it’s not what ”good” and “kind” and enlightened people say or do.”

 

...But I won’t, I’ll simply say it’s glaringly offensive to many more members than likely just me and that your statements are fallacious and painfully lacking in objectivity. They are also harmful, please stop.

 

I couldn’t let this go. So if I read something like this again, which is likely, I’ll have to ignore it for my own well-being and because I’m tired of debating and arguing against ridiculous and harmful ideas and beliefs on here.

 

I may not always be correct, but I believe that I am here.

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What Wildflower? Maybe you and eastcoast should have thought more positively so that you wouldn’t have had any withdrawal symptoms in the first place, at least that way you’d both be living up to your own faulty beliefs and ideals.

 

Disbelieving how bad it can be and continue to be for years for protracted members and claiming moral superiority over them for their suffering is the same as medical professionals disbelieving and dismissing any and all of us for sustaining any injury at all from benzodiazepines.

 

If eastcoast is claiming no one else can measure her suffering how is it that she can claim she knows the severity of symptoms and suffering of others? That’s a total double standard. She can’t accurately claim she has suffered as much, more or anywhere near the length or level of anyone on here from these meds any more than anyone else can claim she has not.

 

She completely avoids the protracted board, yet claims she is and that she is only mentally and morally superior in her approach to her own suffering. And this is why she is able to to be who she is now and do what she does. And you support this attitude.

 

Whether it’s out of fear or ignorance, it’s damaging and harmful to people who suffer severely for years. What eastcoast reports, and again there is no way I can know the level of suffering or what it’s like to live with any remaining symptoms she has, sounds like it’s livable and manageable compared to the very real severity of many protracted member’s symptoms and the prolonged nature of their very real and debilitating, often completely disabled conditions.

 

I’m sure many of the protracted members here would trade the severity of their completely real and unimagined situations for eastcoast’s self-reportedly light menu. From what I gather from what she reports about the manageability of her symptoms it may be that I wouldn’t claim protracted if I had them either, yet she seems to take the voice of “the right way to do things” for all here including members with quite serious injury of protracted status. This is the same kind of (or a similar sounding) voice that comes from you and some others about your distaste for the “negativity” of other member’s thinking and expression when they are realistically reporting either or both the severity or length of their suffering and how they choose to survive through the process of trying to recover from their injury.

 

None of us can compare the suffering we experience with any other single member here, group or subset. To take a stance that one can somehow measure and compare their suffering, or discount the vast array of experiences and severity of symptoms that exist in the first place and boil a “good” survival or enduring of it down to good character and mental attitude is ridiculous at best and severely shortsighted, dismissive and immensely harmful at worst. It’s an entirely subjective and inaccurate way to assess anything at all here. It’s also marginalizing and demeaning to those people who have many, many posts on the protracted board which (when actually read) entirely prove my point here and why I find each of your positions incredibly harmful—along with those of similar attitude.

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I find it incredibly sad that a success story has devolved in this way, there are so few protracted success stories, it gives little hope to those who suffer from long term benzodiazapine withdrawal syndrome.  Can't we let one of the only ones provide hope?

 

This forum should never be about who has it worse, or who does it better, this forum should be a safe, non-judgemental place for those who are suffering.  We have one thing in common on this forum and we can't even agree on this one thing, to support each other through this nightmare.  As I said, this makes me sad.

 

Can we please get back to rejoicing in Mrs. B's success?

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