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Three weeks off Xanax Cold Turkey. Success


[Th...]

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I'll get down to the facts.  I began abusing Xanax over a year ago.  It began as extremely heavy use for about 1-2 months  (2-10 mg per day), along with a plethora of alcohol and illicit drugs.  I was completely unaware of how bad the withdrawals could really get.  I

 

figured I would just be sick for a few days and then be totally good.  Wrong.  After the period of heavy use, I noticed I did not feel normal at all.  I was extremely panicky, anxious, sick, and could not sleep at ALL.  I went back to using xanax just so I could sleep.  I

 

noticed I started feeling normal again, and assumed it was due to lack of sleep.  However, I began to realize I could no longer sleep without Xanax.  I thought my feelings of extreme anxiety were due to insomnia and did not consider that it could be withdrawal.  So I

 

began using 1-2 mg daily, only once at bed time.  I thought that if I was only using a "safe" amount, there was no chance that I would become dependent on this nasty drug.  How wrong I was.  I wish I had found this site back then.  The xanax use continued for nearly

 

a year until I had enough.  (It is important to add that I was only using Xanax, only using nightly, and took several breaks lasting days, up to a month at a time)  However, I was using almost every night.  After about 6 months of doing this, I noticed I was not feeling

 

myself at all anymore.  I dropped off socially, my grades and work performance took a serious hit, I felt like I had lost my personality and emotion, and I was extremely depressed.  Looking back, I was going through inter-dose withdrawal.  I was mildly withdrawing all day

 

just to get that relief from dosing at night and going to sleep.  Finally, I had enough.  I was using for about a year total.  I stopped cold turkey from 1 mg nightly (daily for about 2-3 months with no breaks).  The first week was horrid.  No sleep.  Constant panic.  "Brain

 

zaps", as they call it.  Weird bodily sensations.  No appetite... Pure hell.  My apologies to anyone who has to go through this for an extended period of time....  I could not function.  After a week, I felt somewhat better.  Still anxious, sleeping poorly, but functional.  After

 

about two weeks, I noticed something amazing.  I was able to feel again.  I was able to laugh and cry.  I felt emotions other than stress and panic.  I felt feelings that had been suppressed for a year.  My personality began to return, I began seeing my friends again.  I

 

no longer went to sleep and woke up dreading the next day.  Now, three weeks in, I can sleep normally for the first time in over a year.  I am eating good and returning back to my normal weight.  I look healthy.  I can look in the mirror and its like the sparkle in my eyes is

 

back.  At times, I really thought I had gone crazy.  I thought I lost it all, that it was permanent.  I never thought that these drugs could have such a profound impact on us mentally ,physically, and spiritually. "Normal" has never felt so f*cking good....

 

 

 

 

Cold turkey worked for me.  By 2 weeks I was at 70%,  at 3 weeks I'm at 90% and so much happier than I  EVER was on benzos.    I'm not recommending it for everyone.  My personal benzo use was not as bad as many on this website.  Also, I was using benzos

 

without a prescription up until the last month.  I have since stopped filling that prescription.  This means that "rebound anxiety and insomnia" was not as big of an issue for me because I didn't have bad anxiety prior to my use.  I used on average 1-2mg  of xanax once

 

at bed time about 3/4 of the nights in the past year.  This is still very significant.  I have read stories of people using less for shorter periods of time and having a much worse time than I did.  It is also important to note that I am a 20 year old male, in very good physical

 

health.  Especially during withdrawal, I was working out heavily and going to the sauna nearly every in an effort to flush my system clean of all drugs.  Diet and exercise are very important, not just in recovery, but in general.  Exercise really helped with the anxiety and

 

discomfort.  Also, don't be terrified by the horror stories.  This site is very helpful for information.  However, I hate to say it, but some of the people here can be very discouraging because their experience is difficult.  Keep in mind, that the people who recover relatively

 

quickly and easily, usually don't end up on these forums.  You don't hear nearly as many of the easy success stories as you do the horror stories.  Don't automatically assume that you will be going through hell for months or years.  You might, but then again you might

 

not.  I braced myself and prepared for the worst.  Honestly, spending hours reading horror stories and dwelling on the withdrawal just revved up the anxiety and was often worse than the physical symptoms.  Try to continue with work, get outside, exercise and attempt to

 

live life as normally as possible.  Don't put your life on hold if you can help it.  You will come out of this with a new found gratitude and appreciation for just being able to live normally.  You will be happier and stronger than you were before you ever started.  Don't get

 

discouraged and scared.  It's mostly the anxiety thinking, not you.  The way you feel is not you, it is your body recovering.  Give it time.  I thought I was going insane.  You WILL feel normal again.

 

 

 

 

Feel free to inbox me.  Good luck and much love to all of you :)

 

-The Deacon

 

 

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So happy it is going well for you. Just wondering if you are a very young person? BTW..I consider 30 and under very young. Sometimes I think younger people handle this much better than the over the hill gang does. Of course that usually means we have a longer history of taking this damn poison.

 

Best wishes that you remain strong and on the recovery train.

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Yes.  I am 20 year old male who exercises a lot.  In early withdrawal, I spent hours and hours and hours reading threads on this forum.  I don't know if there is science to support this, but from everything I have read on here, young people seem to have a MUCH easier time recovering.  I know that at 20, my brain is still developing.  Exercise and the sauna really helped too...  Usually the older folks have been using for longer.  However, I've read of people who had used in very similar patterns to me and had a much harder time.  Also, I have read that for Xanax specifically used for sleep, the withdrawal seems to be less difficult too.  Again, no hard evidence but I have read several reports of people having an easier time.  I believe that's because Xanax has such a short half-life.  If you use it once daily, especially with a fast metabolism, its nearly out of your system by the time you use again the next night.  That explains why I started to feel bad well before I actually quit.  Tolerance and inter-dose withdrawal. 
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[06...]

Deacon,

Thank you for sharing. I have been struggling on finding hope while I taper from Ativan and reactions to gabapentin. I have fear. Really bad fear, that I think overtakes me. I have hope today, that if you can make it in a short time, maybe I can too. Thank you for allowing your sharing to be the kleenex I needed this morning to.wipe away the tears.

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your quick recovery is pretty unusual for a CT. i am glad it was successful for you, but i would not recommend of that being the way to go. My CT experience was nothing less than horrific.
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Yes, I am not recommending cold turkey to anyone... I'm just saying it worked in my case.  Just want to share some hope that many people do go through the process (relatively) easily.  The first week was horrific, but things have been steadily improving for me. 

 

My goal here was to share a positive story because I remember reading all those horror stories during my early withdrawal.  It's important to remember that the people who have the hardest times usually end up on the forums.  The vast majority of those who get through

 

it, especially the quick healers, often don't find their way here.  Also, many people join during early recovery and stop logging once they start feeling better.  This contributes to the lack of success stories.  Although I have read my share of stories from people who healed

 

as quickly as I did.  Don't lose hope!  And the anxiety from the withdrawal is making it seem a lot scarier than it may actually be.  It sure did for me.  Much love and good luck to everyone. 

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[06...]

Yes, I am not recommending cold turkey to anyone... I'm just saying it worked in my case.  Just want to share some hope that many people do go through the process (relatively) easily.  The first week was horrific, but things have been steadily improving for me. 

 

My goal here was to share a positive story because I remember reading all those horror stories during my early withdrawal.  It's important to remember that the people who have the hardest times usually end up on the forums.  The vast majority of those who get through

 

it, especially the quick healers, often don't find their way here.  Also, many people join during early recovery and stop logging once they start feeling better.  This contributes to the lack of success stories.  Although I have read my share of stories from people who healed

 

as quickly as I did.  Don't lose hope!  And the anxiety from the withdrawal is making it seem a lot scarier than it may actually be.  It sure did for me.  Much love and good luck to everyone.

Though it might be "unusually" quick, it's just as you said, many people don't make it here to BB or stay long because they simply aren't feeling what many of us here do. Sometimes that gives me hope too, that maybe I can write my own success story.  Kudos to you for being "unusually healed" for a cold turkey. I regret each day I didn't stick mine out and reinstated at a higher dose to taper. 7 weeks. I was off of it for seven weeks.

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Yes, I am not recommending cold turkey to anyone... I'm just saying it worked in my case.  Just want to share some hope that many people do go through the process (relatively) easily.  The first week was horrific, but things have been steadily improving for me. 

 

My goal here was to share a positive story because I remember reading all those horror stories during my early withdrawal.  It's important to remember that the people who have the hardest times usually end up on the forums.  The vast majority of those who get through

 

it, especially the quick healers, often don't find their way here.  Also, many people join during early recovery and stop logging once they start feeling better.  This contributes to the lack of success stories.  Although I have read my share of stories from people who healed

 

as quickly as I did.  Don't lose hope!  And the anxiety from the withdrawal is making it seem a lot scarier than it may actually be.  It sure did for me.  Much love and good luck to everyone.

Though it might be "unusually" quick, it's just as you said, many people don't make it here to BB or stay long because they simply aren't feeling what many of us here do. Sometimes that gives me hope too, that maybe I can write my own success story.  Kudos to you for being "unusually healed" for a cold turkey. I regret each day I didn't stick mine out and reinstated at a higher dose to taper. 7 weeks. I was off of it for seven weeks.

 

If you stay on track, you WILL be able to write your own success story eventually.  Hopefully, this next jump will be much easier

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  • 1 year later...

I'll get down to the facts.  I began abusing Xanax over a year ago.  It began as extremely heavy use for about 1-2 months  (2-10 mg per day), along with a plethora of alcohol and illicit drugs.  I was completely unaware of how bad the withdrawals could really get.  I

 

figured I would just be sick for a few days and then be totally good.  Wrong.  After the period of heavy use, I noticed I did not feel normal at all.  I was extremely panicky, anxious, sick, and could not sleep at ALL.  I went back to using xanax just so I could sleep.  I

 

noticed I started feeling normal again, and assumed it was due to lack of sleep.  However, I began to realize I could no longer sleep without Xanax.  I thought my feelings of extreme anxiety were due to insomnia and did not consider that it could be withdrawal.  So I

 

began using 1-2 mg daily, only once at bed time.  I thought that if I was only using a "safe" amount, there was no chance that I would become dependent on this nasty drug.  How wrong I was.  I wish I had found this site back then.  The xanax use continued for nearly

 

a year until I had enough.  (It is important to add that I was only using Xanax, only using nightly, and took several breaks lasting days, up to a month at a time)  However, I was using almost every night.  After about 6 months of doing this, I noticed I was not feeling

 

myself at all anymore.  I dropped off socially, my grades and work performance took a serious hit, I felt like I had lost my personality and emotion, and I was extremely depressed.  Looking back, I was going through inter-dose withdrawal.  I was mildly withdrawing all day

 

just to get that relief from dosing at night and going to sleep.  Finally, I had enough.  I was using for about a year total.  I stopped cold turkey from 1 mg nightly (daily for about 2-3 months with no breaks).  The first week was horrid.  No sleep.  Constant panic.  "Brain

 

zaps", as they call it.  Weird bodily sensations.  No appetite... Pure hell.  My apologies to anyone who has to go through this for an extended period of time....  I could not function.  After a week, I felt somewhat better.  Still anxious, sleeping poorly, but functional.  After

 

about two weeks, I noticed something amazing.  I was able to feel again.  I was able to laugh and cry.  I felt emotions other than stress and panic.  I felt feelings that had been suppressed for a year.  My personality began to return, I began seeing my friends again.  I

 

no longer went to sleep and woke up dreading the next day.  Now, three weeks in, I can sleep normally for the first time in over a year.  I am eating good and returning back to my normal weight.  I look healthy.  I can look in the mirror and its like the sparkle in my eyes is

 

back.  At times, I really thought I had gone crazy.  I thought I lost it all, that it was permanent.  I never thought that these drugs could have such a profound impact on us mentally ,physically, and spiritually. "Normal" has never felt so f*cking good....

 

 

 

 

Cold turkey worked for me.  By 2 weeks I was at 70%,  at 3 weeks I'm at 90% and so much happier than I  EVER was on benzos.    I'm not recommending it for everyone.  My personal benzo use was not as bad as many on this website.  Also, I was using benzos

 

without a prescription up until the last month.  I have since stopped filling that prescription.  This means that "rebound anxiety and insomnia" was not as big of an issue for me because I didn't have bad anxiety prior to my use.  I used on average 1-2mg  of xanax once

 

at bed time about 3/4 of the nights in the past year.  This is still very significant.  I have read stories of people using less for shorter periods of time and having a much worse time than I did.  It is also important to note that I am a 20 year old male, in very good physical

 

health.  Especially during withdrawal, I was working out heavily and going to the sauna nearly every in an effort to flush my system clean of all drugs.  Diet and exercise are very important, not just in recovery, but in general.  Exercise really helped with the anxiety and

 

discomfort.  Also, don't be terrified by the horror stories.  This site is very helpful for information.  However, I hate to say it, but some of the people here can be very discouraging because their experience is difficult.  Keep in mind, that the people who recover relatively

 

quickly and easily, usually don't end up on these forums.  You don't hear nearly as many of the easy success stories as you do the horror stories.  Don't automatically assume that you will be going through hell for months or years.  You might, but then again you might

 

not.  I braced myself and prepared for the worst.  Honestly, spending hours reading horror stories and dwelling on the withdrawal just revved up the anxiety and was often worse than the physical symptoms.  Try to continue with work, get outside, exercise and attempt to

 

live life as normally as possible.  Don't put your life on hold if you can help it.  You will come out of this with a new found gratitude and appreciation for just being able to live normally.  You will be happier and stronger than you were before you ever started.  Don't get

 

discouraged and scared.  It's mostly the anxiety thinking, not you.  The way you feel is not you, it is your body recovering.  Give it time.  I thought I was going insane.  You WILL feel normal again.

 

 

 

 

Feel free to inbox me.  Good luck and much love to all of you :)

 

-The Deacon

 

Thanks for sharing

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Yes.  I am 20 year old male who exercises a lot.  In early withdrawal, I spent hours and hours and hours reading threads on this forum.  I don't know if there is science to support this, but from everything I have read on here, young people seem to have a MUCH easier time recovering.  I know that at 20, my brain is still developing.  Exercise and the sauna really helped too...  Usually the older folks have been using for longer.  However, I've read of people who had used in very similar patterns to me and had a much harder time.  Also, I have read that for Xanax specifically used for sleep, the withdrawal seems to be less difficult too.  Again, no hard evidence but I have read several reports of people having an easier time.  I believe that's because Xanax has such a short half-life.  If you use it once daily, especially with a fast metabolism, its nearly out of your system by the time you use again the next night.  That explains why I started to feel bad well before I actually quit.  Tolerance and inter-dose withdrawal.

 

My husband has a theory as I taper from an ungodly amount of Klonopin. "Stretching the times between when I take the drug" So I would feel some inter withdraw then take a pill. And taper that way.

It could work? My husband is "straight edge" But he did get me off Effexor by his tapering method (an excellent taper on an Excel spread sheet).

It's a theory, but I have a while before I really start feeling the impact of withdraw because as of now, my body, even though I did drop 1 full pill, is still getting a good amount each day.

So happy for you!

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