Author Topic: Complete healing from a Klonopin cold turkey!  (Read 22352 times)

[Buddie]

Complete healing from a Klonopin cold turkey!
« on: February 06, 2010, 03:33:10 pm »
I was on Klonopin for about 5 years, I took it on a as needed basis but as needed turned out to be quite often.  My dose at the end of my use was between 6 to 10 milligrams a day.  My behavior and personality had changed, I knew I had to stop so I did, on October 10, 2007.  I checked myself into a rehab facility on Oct 12, I was beginning to feel very ill.  They gave me 2 doses of Klonopin that day along with 2 doses of Phenobarbital, as I was told me there was a danger of seizure. That was the extent of my detox, I was to join the general population of the facility to learn the 12 steps the next day.  I knew nothing of benzodiazepines, didn't know they must be tapered, but somehow knew I was in trouble.  I checked myself out against medical advice that night with a prescription for 5 Phenobarbital in my pocket.  The next day I tried to find a Dr who could help me, but they all referred me to the facility I'd just left.  
 
Thus my nightmare began, one filled with unimaginable pain and agony.  The first days felt as if my internal organs were being shredded, I could only lay on my couch and writhe in pain.   As the days passed my extremities, all of my muscles were being twisted and shredded.  The pain was relentless accompanied by no sleep, nausea, trembling, twitching and the darkest, most fear filled thoughts I'd ever known.  I was too sick to research what was happening to me, I could only guess I'd been poisoned by the drug.  I made frantic calls to the facility I'd left, asking for help to understand what was happening to me.  They thought I was drug seeking, thought I wanted more Phenobarbital, I wasn't, I just wanted to know how to help myself.  
 
I finally got on the Internet after 3 weeks of torture and found an article about a rock star who'd withdrawn from Klonopin, she said it had taken her 45 days to heal from her nightmare.  I was disheartened, how could I endure this for 45 days.  But as the days turned into weeks and weeks turned into months, I finally found BenzoBuddies; 5 months after my cold turkey and learned the truth.  It isn't days, or weeks it's months before healing takes place.
 
I'm writing this story because I know the hopelessness you feel, I know the fear and the pain, but now I also know the joy of complete healing.  The relief I feel each day is something I'll always cherish.  I've returned to who I was before benzo's, but I'm so much better than I was then because I've learned a valuable lesson for which I will always be grateful.  I have joy in my life again, I can feel emotion and love. I know peace and relaxation, and I'm free from anxiety and fear.   I told myself I was completely healed at 14 months past my cold turkey, but I'm not sure that's true now because my life has continued to improve since that time.  I don't know if it's still healing from the Klonopin or if my gratitude to be well has given my life new meaning.  
 
I did this the hard way, I stopped cold turkey but this only proves that however you do it, whatever works for you, we call all heal from this.  Don't give up hope, it will happen for you too.
 
[...]
« Last Edit: September 06, 2010, 10:06:51 pm by [Buddie] »
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Complete healing from a cold turkey from Klonopin
« Reply #1 on: February 06, 2010, 05:35:03 pm »
Thank you [...] for writing this.  :smitten:
You have to be the most courages & brave person I have ever known and your story is incredibly inspiring to us all!
Your were my angel at my most darkest moments of dispair and your words of compassion and encouragement kept me strong!
You deserve all the blessings and gifts this world has to offer and I hope you continue to live life to the fullest and cherish each and every moment.
Your a TRUE survivor and I hope one day to be in your shoes and give others the same hope that you have given us!
Eternally grateful,
XXXXX :smitten: :smitten: :smitten:
[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Complete healing from a cold turkey from Klonopin
« Reply #2 on: February 06, 2010, 07:17:12 pm »
Hey [...],

     I'm welling up with tears of joy and hope from your story.  I/we need to know that our lives will not be trapped in a time warp filled with pain and suffering.  Eventually, complete healing will most assuredly come.  I am sorry that you suffered, but someone had to be the designated forerunner for myself and others.

     On the open forum and private pms you have lifted me up so many times out of places of despair.  Your advice wasn't always sugar coated either...which is what I needed.  Sometimes I/we need a bit of a stern hand to keep us on the right path throughout this journey.

     I'm in agreement with [...], you are most courageous and brave and your story is incredibly inspiring. 

     I know that you are not in it for the accolades or glory, but you are here because you have a genuine love for us.  I also am eternally grateful.

     You deserve all of the good things that life has to offer...and if life is giving you even more and greater healing then so be it!

     At my complete healing, I hope that I have learned enough from you and others who have completely healed to stay put and help others along this journey.  As long as we have those dreaded benzos wrecking havoc in peoples lives, we need to have watchmen (and women) on the wall looking out for those who accidentally take a detour down this pathway. 

     I have absolute love in my heart for you.   You stayed the course so that I can stay the course! 
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Complete healing from a cold turkey from Klonopin
« Reply #3 on: February 06, 2010, 07:51:37 pm »
Thank you Pammy! What an inspiring story.  :smitten: :smitten: :smitten:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Complete healing from a cold turkey from Klonopin
« Reply #4 on: February 06, 2010, 08:01:22 pm »

[...],

I have often cited you as one of the examples of people that have healed 100 percent from benzos.  Now, I have a story to link people to. :)  Congrats on coming this far, you are an inspiration to all of us in the quest to rid ourselves of benzos, their sx and their wd effects.  You are living proof that there is life on the other side.  Thank you for your story. :)

[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Complete healing from a cold turkey from Klonopin
« Reply #5 on: February 06, 2010, 09:33:36 pm »

Dear [...], :)

You are one of a kind!! You were one of the angels I have found here at BB when I came desperate for help after a c/t. I remember that whenever I read your  posts and replies to others and to me, my desperation turned into hope. You are full of compassion, love, patience and wisdom. I am considered fully recovered, and you were one of those special people who guided me to make it possible.

You hold grace and deserve the best of happiness, not only for your ability to endure hell and heal, but for the enormous amount of help, hope and love you have provided to so many people in here.   


Warmly,

Shelly
 :smitten: :smitten:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Complete healing from a cold turkey from Klonopin
« Reply #6 on: February 07, 2010, 07:08:06 pm »
Thanks [...]!! Love ya!!  :smitten:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Complete healing from a cold turkey from Klonopin
« Reply #7 on: February 09, 2010, 06:31:11 pm »
Hi [...].

You don't know me, as I 've rarely posted here. However, I want you to know that your story has been a continued source of hope for me over the past several months as I have spent time reading your posts to other members. Thank you.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Complete healing from a cold turkey from Klonopin
« Reply #8 on: February 10, 2010, 03:31:21 pm »
[...] ~

I am so glad you posted this. [...] told me you had, and I found
your story today. Thank you for posting this into the permanent BB record
for all of us now and all who come after to read and derive hope from.

I have never understood how you were able to CT the clon without any
support. It has always impressed the socks off me. Not so much that you
attempted it, but that you stuck with it. Just. Wow.

And here you are, posting gratitude and healing and a new life and a
new outlook. I am thrilled for you.

This is one of the very few places that actually lets BB's know that the healing
process is likely to take months. You can imagine how helpful that is to
those of us waiting out our recovery.

Thank you again for you honesty, sharing, support. Wishing you well and
sending you  :hug: s &  :smitten:

Always ~
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Complete healing from a cold turkey from Klonopin
« Reply #9 on: February 10, 2010, 05:53:08 pm »
Hi [...],

I have not been posting lately but after I read this I felt the need to jump in. I am now 10 weeks Benzo free and the healing process is becoming more obvious every day. Very early on when I joined BB at the end of my taper , you were very responsive to me in my posts. I will never forget advice I received from you and still follow it. I still am a bit foggy , many aches and pains , but my spirit is strong knowing that I was able to hang in there. I know that your posts help me through.
thx again , you are great for this site.

Blue
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.