Is benzo depression different?

Wanting to know if others experience benzo depression?  If so, is it true that as Ashton says that it can be treated with antidepressants?  Thanks for any input.

Hi! I am looking forward to following this post.  I am being treated for depression (for several decades).  Anyway, now that I'm down to 1mg Val a day, I feel more depressed but I don't know if it's "different", or if it's a part of brain healing....  Sorry I don't have a definitive answer but let's hope some of our Buddies know.

Oh, yes. Much more crushing and oppressive than the depression I had pre benzos. Before benzos, it was more like feeling blue, gray, unhappy for stretches of time, but not this down..

Oh, yes. Much more crushing and oppressive than the depression I had pre benzos. Before benzos, it was more like feeling blue, gray, unhappy for stretches of time, but not this down..

 

benzo depression is just brutal

I wasn't depressed before benzodiazepines.  Now I am and for me, nothing touches it. The lower the dose gets, however, the less distorted my thinking though the sadness, darkness, hopelessness, etc.  hangs on.

I hope this is different. I'm feeling pretty hopeless the past few days. I have been benzo free for 4 weeks and it's brutal.

I do think it is different, but don't know on the ADs (I had the same question). I definitely did not have pre existing psychological depression before long term benzo use ...and now what I experience depression wise is nothing short of intolerable so it's not typical depression from what I am experiencing.

 

For me....strange as this sounds 20 minutes of moderate freestyle swimming completely took (takes when I can do it) depression away (had severe injury so my exercise antidepressant mostly gone I am now at point where I am trying antidepressants  ....currently trying Wellbutrin but not helping ....dont know that it means nothing can

 

 

Have no idea if exercise would work you but swimming incredibly effective to lift benzo depression for me ..... elliptical machine a close second...again we are all different, but I would think not gong to hurt much to try .....hope you find something that helps you!

I would say yes it is different.  The distorted thinking is intense and the physical issues like insomnia, digestive problems, etc just take it to another level as well....a psychotic, twisted wasteland.  The anxiety mixed in is also brutal....the background kind is very insidious.

All true and when You have pre existing depressive illness its even worse, it slams You twice as hard adding on more symptoms. I deal with it every day but during My last taper two years ago I noticed that at least in My case the lower the dose got the less depressive symptoms appeared.  Everyone is different and yes those who have been through this before all say its harder the second time around , I could not agree more.

 

 

Johnny, after you tapered the first time, did your pre-existing depression come back? Thanks. Cross

Brutal is the only word I have for my benzo depression.  Nothing like what I felt before taking benzos.  Everytime I cut during my taper I would get hit with about a week of crushing depression.  I figured it would be about the same when I fully jumped about a month ago.  I wish.  This is 4 weeks plus of pain like I've never felt before.  These w/d symptoms (tinnitus, anxiety, etc) do not help either.

I didn't have severe depression until I got on Klonopin (and then tapered it).  I am now 15 months off of it (as well as Paxil).  The depression is slowly leaving and on days where I'm more well-rested, the depression is almost non-existent.  I've noticed a big correlation between depression and lack of sleep.

Can diazapam cause depression.  Although trying to reduce if I have to increase because I can't cope with side effects my mood drops

I've had depression my whole life (runs in the family) but benzo depression is a million times worse.

 

While struggling with pretty severe depression my whole life, I managed to have a bit of a love life, multiple jobs, receive my bachelors, my masters, many creative accomplishments... I used to want to tour the world with my music (almost did and got very close to making that a reality until benzo's ruined my life)

 

... now, I am literally jobless, completely isolated, crying alone in my bedroom. Has been like this for a year and a half now. With regular depression everyday was a struggle, but I still had hope and dreams for the future, and ofter surprised myself by accomplishing much more than I thought I could.... now.... there's very little hope and no more dreams. The dream is gone.

 

 

 

 

 

My only hope is that, by standing strong through this...

if the benzo depression lifts, I will have a new appreciation for life and things will be better then ever.

 

My only hope is that, by standing strong through this...

if the benzo depression lifts, I will have a new appreciation for life and things will be better then ever.

 

I think your last sentence is filled with more than hope.  I see truth there.

I've had minor depressions occasionally in life, also I'm a kinda melancholic person, but it has never scared me, I have always accepted my melancholy and made it a part of me and used in my creativity and art.

The depression I've experienced I w/d though, is the most hellish deep black dark dungeon of despair, I never ever been so afraid and It seriously made me think of ending it all, because the feeling was so unbearable.

I've had minor depressions occasionally in life, also I'm a kinda melancholic person, but it has never scared me, I have always accepted my melancholy and made it a part of me and used in my creativity and art.

The depression I've experienced I w/d though, is the most hellish deep black dark dungeon of despair, I never ever been so afraid and It seriously made me think of ending it all, because the feeling was so unbearable.

 

The very same here.  For me, it's most crushing in the mornings now.  I wake up into horror.  Thoughts that my life is over and there is no hope blanket me.  It's like it needs another name other depression. 

I never had that deep dark chemical depression again, and I hope I don't get another wave of that, the kind of depression I have now is more a sadness of seeing life passing by, the feeling of not being in control over my life and future, the frustration over not to be able to work out the ideas I have in my head etc etc

G.d I miss my life soooo much😕

I never had that deep dark chemical depression again, and I hope I don't get another wave of that, the kind of depression I have now is more a sadness of seeing life passing by, the feeling of not being in control over my life and future, the frustration over not to be able to work out the ideas I have in my head etc etc

G.d I miss my life soooo much😕

 

I know that frustration.  I was going through it even when on benzos.  I couldn't think my way out of a wet paper bag.  I still can't. This benzo depression, on the other hand, is so deep and dark.  I can't see the forest.  I can't see the trees.  I can't see anything.

Redoingme.... soon there will be a crack, and in every crack there is light... we must stay positive and not loosing ourselves into the negative Benzo thoughts... I send some northern Scandinavian strength to you🎈 Stay sound and the light will come

There has been nothing worse than the depression and anxiety after being on 2mg Klonopin for 5 years.  3 years of tapering and no light at the end of the tunnel yet.  Agoraphobia and social anxiety out of control.  Currently on 3.5mg valium and V maybe even worse

It seems harder than the underlying mood issues and in my case has been diagnosed as a major depressive episode.  That being said, AD/therapy/exercise/spiritual health/good nutrition/sleep are all important aspects of healing. This is not a character flaw but a sx of brain that's healing and desperately in need of enough serotonin and dopamine. Take care of yourself and keep us posted as to your progress.

Yes much stronger, dark, and hopeless. I've suffered mild depression my whole life, well since 17 on, and this depression is so much worse; my thoughts are morbid and very very cyclical. Good news is, and this is from someone who has tapered 2 times before, it gets better. First time I came off Klonopin and did not rush it I felt great post taper, better than ever! Granted this is my experience, but there is good reason to try to keep hope alive.

Third time,

I just ended my taper and I feel like the depression will never go away. It's lightened since the beginning but it is always present and I never feel happiness or pleasure.  I didn't have preexisting depression so this is tremendously difficult and makes me feel hopeless. When did it lift for you?

A question for those who have posted earlier on this thread: have any of you seen any improvement? 

 

I agree with all of the above comments - I've had "normal" depression before.  There's something very brutal and dark about this iatragenic depression.  I'm looking for some hope, so please be careful about replying if it's only a horror story... I'm sorry, but I'm not up for that.  For those who got better, how long did it take? 

 

Thanks