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Clonazepam User in Withdrawal Process


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Hello,

 

I have been taking Clonazepam for about 5 mos now.  My issues started about 8 mos back after a workout in the gym.  I went to ER after complaining about strange feeling of death and major head and neck aches.  All my tests including MRIs were negative until I finally had MRI on my neck 3 weeks ago.  I have no other med history.

 

Basically I have been placed on Lyrica, Diazepam, Ultram, Xanax, Ambien, Zoloft, Lexapro, and Clonazepam at different times.  Thankfully I did not take most of these meds for any long period except Clonazepam and its the only thing I have taken for the last 3 mos.    Docs tried to put me on Zoloft and Lexapro but I had very bad side effects with the SSRI class.

 

I started on .75 mg Clonazepam and after a long time am currently between .25 and .375 mg.  My anxiety symptoms have decreased dramatically over the last couple of months but my major issue is insomnia.  Before all this I could sleep on a brick;  since this happened, it takes about an hour to fall asleep and get at most 6-7 hrs of unrestful shut-eye.  Recently I get maybe 2-3 hrs and feel exhausted.  I have lost a lot of muscle tone.  I was having issues sleeping after the incident and before taking the Clonazepam, so its really hard to say where the sleep issue is coming from.  I believe the Clonazepam does not help with that but maybe still reduces the anxiolytic effects.

 

My goals are to mainly get my sleeping patterns back and stop obsessing with this.  There are all sorts of side effects from lack of sleep I am experiencing, but I cannot seem to get the rest I need.  I am hoping this forum will be able to help me understand Clonazepam's role in this and get the sleeping patterns I so desperately crave to get back and taper off this crap completely.  Tks!

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Hi Legand,

 

Welcome to BenzoBuddies.

 

I was on Clonazepam too, I felt pretty dreadful taking it, and even worse while withdrawing, but it was well worth it in the end. My sleep too was very chaotic, but it did improve over time.

 

For how long, altogether, have you been taking benzodiazepines? When was the last time you were benzodiazepine-free?

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Hi Colin, tks for this forum and your reply!

 

I have never taken any meds before 5/2009 and am approaching 40.  Lucky, I guess.  I have become educated on these benzos and read some of the Ashton Manual.  I am well aware of the tapering methods and have been dry cutting .125 at a time until recently.

 

I took my first Valium (Diazepam) on 6/4/2009.  Before that I was benzo-free.  I was on and off benzos the first month but took them every day since July.

 

 

 

 

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Hi legend888ls,

 

I envy your former sleeping habits, I'm sure you miss them.  Insomnia is a big problem for those tapering benzo's.  My sleep was very disrupted after I stopped taking Klonopin cold turkey and stayed that way for many months until I finally healed from the experience.

 

I feel you're doing the right thing by tapering from the drug to allow yourself to assess your situation with them out of the equation.

 

Ask questions if you have them, we're here to help.

 

Pam

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Welcome Legend:)

I just got off clonazepam/Klonopin 2 weeks ago and on the road to healing. I was miserble on it for years but never put the pieces together till this summer.

I hope you find some good answers on this board...the mods are saints! :angel:

Wishing you a smooth taper!

XXXX :smitten:

Shelley

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Did you injure yourself at the gym to somehow start the pain in your neck and head or is it anxiety related?It seeems allot of the medication they gave you was for pain. I know you will get help and support here to get it all sorted out. Welcome to this board.
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Hi Legend 888ls - did any daignosis come from your final MRI.  Just to share my experience with you - I had a series of major panic attacks in August 2007 which led to my experience with Clonazepam after I developed anxiety.  I ask about your diagnosis because your experience at the gym sounds very similar to my first panic attack - a feeling of impending doom, racing heart, tightness in the neck and back of the head.  A very, very frightening experience - did anyone suggest a panic attack?  Mine came completely out of the blue when my husband and I were driving to a meeting - no prior warning.  I finished up in an ambulance heading to ER - even said my goodbyes to my husband on the way - I really thought I wasn't going to make it.  Had lots of tests but nothing showed up after three more trips to ER and a three day hospital stay.

 

Sorry to hear your sleep has been affected through your taper - unfortunately a very common symptom.  You're right try not to obsess about sleep.  Not always easy but if you tell yourself you won't sleep, then you won't. 

 

Good luck with the rest of your taper - just one other thing, seems like you're varying your daily dose a little.  Best to stick to one dose each day and taper from there.  Just gives your body a better chance to start the healing.

 

 

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Hello all,

 

Thank you for all the great replies and concerns!

 

To add a little more detail about what happened-

Generally,  I spent 2-3 days/week in the gym mainly doing cardio.  Haven't been back since April 30, the day that has changed my life since.

I was introduced to a squatting machine and I now am certain my neck was out of position.  I felt some discomfort in the back of my head, and once I stopped the exercise, I was left with my left arm trembling and profuse sweating.  I then had what I now know was some sort of anxiety attack- panic if you will.  I never experienced this kind of feeling before, so I had no idea what I was about to contend with up until now.  I was getting intense headaches, stiffness in the back of the neck, complete loss of appetite, and really bad insomnia.  I ended up losing about 20 lbs during the first 3 mos.

 

I am trying to keep the experience with doctors out of the conversation--I've seen every specialist and tried every treatment there is:

 

Osteopaths

Neurologists (2 different docs)

PCP (3 different docs)

Gastroenterologist

Endocrinologist

Accupuncture

Internal Medicine

Psychologist

Psychiatrist

Chiropractor

 

Dr after Dr said its just anxiety and some said I needed to be medicated.  Out of all the so-called experts above and despite repeating my symptoms, not one of these above suggested I have a bulging disc in my neck, NONE. Not even the Chiropractor suggested this after $7,000 worth of treatments.  I've had X-rays, CT scans and MRIs of my head, all negative.  I had an MRA of my neck, negative.  Blood tests showed a slightly elevated liver issue, hence Gastro and Endocrine visits.  Had Endoscopy as well--all negative.  Again, no one suggested examination of my cervical spine.  The first neuro put me on Lyrica, Ultram, and Xanax, as he cited possible aneurysm or artery issue.  Luckily I only took this stuff for a week, no more.  My first PCP put me on Zoloft, then Ambien and Diazepam, aside from all the blood work, citing OCD/anxiety and attempting to combat sleep issues.  After he said an MRA was more thorough than MRI then insisting the issue was in my head and not physical, I should see a psychiatrist.  Until I saw one there was nothing else he would do. So I fired him.  I knew MRAs and MRIs do not produce the same image and yes it was in my head--almost.  I was relentless in obtaining the correct diagnosis and ended up having to be my own advocate, despite being labeled as an anxiety patient with panic/OCD.  It's amazing to be diagnosed this way without having any previous med history--40 yrs!  My psychologist agreed--most patients with panic/OCD mainly develop issues in their 20's, not at this stage in life.

 

After seeing a 2nd neuro who was much more understanding of my issue, I had an MRI of my neck which revealed the C3 - C4 - C5 disc bulge.  This was only a month ago but a major relief to me.  The neuro said time will heal this and so far he has been correct.  Today, the anxiety levels and side effects are tolerable except for the flare ups--mainly its the sleep deprivation that plagues me.  Because proper treatment could have been administered months earlier, I was livid for awhile but now am at peace with what has happened.  I cannot change the past.

 

I have quit pursuing other remedies, including all current treatment from the chiropractor.  I am focusing on removing all meds (thankfully only one now) from the bloodstream before doing anything else, hopefully that ends up being nothing.  Until recently, I have been consistent with reducing the Clonazepam dosage.  I was down to .25mg once/day consistently around 5-6 pm, but after 3-4 days I was getting much less sleep.  Surely against most advice here, I went back up to .375, but my sleeping issues continue to worsen.  I am only getting 2-3 hrs a night, maybe less.  I was sleeping rather consistently before that, maybe 6-7, although I would not call it satisfying.  Its really been bad the last couple of weeks.

 

I appreciate the input so far and hope to also be of help to others.

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Hello legend,

 

What a nightmare you've lived trying to get a correct medical diagnosis!  I've found too that we must become our own health care advocates, kudos to you for persevering.

 

None of us here will fault you for going back up in your dose, we don't judge.  I'm sorry to hear though that it hasn't helped.  What are you plans now?  Do you feel you need to go up in dose again or will you try to continue to taper? 

 

We have an Insomnia board filled with natural sleeping hints, if you're interested.  http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?board=83.0

 

We're very glad you're here, I hope we'll be able to offer you some comfort.

 

Pam

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As a side note I hate drugs and have a non-addictive personality.  My body's physical dependence is another story.

 

Since upping to .375 really has not helped, I intend to immediately go back down to .25.  I am really trying to avoid any anxiety related issues (the only reason for the slow taper) since I believe the drug appears to no longer help with sleep but hampers my ability to sleep properly.  I am like a lab rat right now---I do not know what to expect from here, but this is the tentative plan:

 

.25 until 12/22

.125 until 1/6

Finished on 1/20

 

I'll check out the sleeping hints.  Thank you.

 

 

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Legend,

I think your description of the onset of symptoms is so sadly common. 

We most all have gone thru Stage 1 : "Terrified."

 

You are to be commended for your perseverance to determine the root cause of your problem. 

I think that many people immediately accept their doctors's diagnosis, and then are relegated to whatever fix they are offered.

 

I've only been to 2 doctors and 1 counselor so far, but have had similar experiences with their helplessness to fix me. 

Only the counselor (who couldn't prescribe meds) suggested that I get off them.

 

I also have an un-resolved neck pain issue that is a part of my regular w/d symptoms, so I really sympathize with that problem.

 

Insomnia makes bedtime a dreaded event, so...starting at least an hour prior to bedtime, I try to make sure to begin winding down.

 

I have recorded some very hum-drum science programs, and watch them just prior to bedtime.

No action or intense dramas or anything with a loud musical background score.

Even then, I turn the volume down low, so that I need to really focus.

 

I try to find and repeat a routine in the evening that I know is calming. 

Like a hot bath, and then a cup of de-caf green tea. 

 

A benzo mind makes you over-focus on your problem. 

If that happens, distract yourself by focusing completely on some routine activity (I like golf).

If you still exercise, then focus on your earlier routine.

 

You haven't been on these meds too long and have a great positive attitude about getting off, so I feel sure you will succeed.

You are in good company and in the right place.

-Your benzo buddie,

    David

 

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Legend,

 

Have you tried relaxation exercises?  I had some issues with insomnia sometime ago.  I found that my anxiety would get worse just about time to go to bed so I began to practice breathing exercises and muscle relaxation techniques.  My insomnia vanished but I still maintain my relaxation practice.  You can find plenty of articles in the internet.

 

 

 

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Wow you've really been through the mill with your medical experiences.  I'm so glad that you've finally been given an accurate diagnosis.  Just wanted to tell my story about panic attacks in case it was similar - turns out yours was a little different so well done for pursuing it.  However we both ended up in the same place unfortunately - on Clonazepam.  Great that you see the need to rid yourself of benzos. :thumbsup:

 

Can't agree more about relaxation techniques to help with the anxiety, especially around bed time and if necessary during the waking times at night.  They have to be worked at though, may take a few days or so before you get any relief.  It's about re-training the mind and getting through to the sub-conscious.  My favourite was listening to relaxation messages on my iPod - sometimes over and over again, just lying on my bed in a quiet, darkened room. 

 

Hope you get some relief soon.

LB

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LB

 

Have you tried meditationoasis' podcast, great guided meditations for those who like it.  I curious about the relaxation messages, do you get them from iTunes podcasts, if so, could you share the name of such?

 

Thanks,

 

Guillermo

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Even though sleep is the major issue for me I am still suffering from:

 

Shakiness, usually more prevalent in AM

Teeth chatter (again in AM), not grinding but similar to the feeling when you are cold

Numbness or tingling on back of tongue, sometimes making it mildly difficult to think and speak fluently

Mildly blurred or distorted vision, usually in left eye. 

Mild pupil dilation, usually left pupil slightly larger than right

Left arm weakness

Noticeable loss of upper body muscle tone

General nervousness

mild headaches

dizziness

 

Except for the loss of muscle tone above, which is a constant, the rest seems to come and go.  The only explanation, other than a real medical condition is either the neurological effects of a bulging disc and Clonazepam, since its the only med I take.

 

BTW, in case I did not mention enough already in previous posts (!), I've 'supposedly' been examined for all major nerve tests by way of NCV and EMG studies, both negative.  Coupled with the negative physical tests, most of the major nerve disorders can be ruled out.

 

I am curious to know if anyone else has experience with bulging disc or even has similar story like above.  I am especially interested to hear people share their stories about sleeping patterns while taking or withdrawing from Clonazepam or other benzos.

 

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Hi legend,

 

I just wanted to give you this article about morning anxiety.  It may explain why some of your symptoms seem to be worse in the a.m.  Sleeplessness due to tolerance or withdrawal from benzo's is perhaps the most common withdrawal symptom there is.  I'm sure you'll find many who share your misery, it was one of the last to leave me, it took about 18 months though. 

 

Understanding Early Morning Anxiety

By Deanne Repich

           

Are mornings the worst time for your anxiety? When the alarm clock rings do you experience a feeling of dread? Do the symptoms kick in, making you tempted to roll over and snooze for hours so you don't have to face the day?

 

One reason why anxiety can be worse in the morning is that waking up is a sharp contrast to the sleep environment, which is perceived as pleasant for most people.

 

Picture this: You're sleeping peacefully in your warm, cozy bed, (for some, after many hours of insomnia). You are at peace, finally getting a break from the cares and tasks of the day. Then, BOOM! Suddenly, the shrill sound of your alarm clock jerks you awake. It triggers the "fight or flight" response, our body's inborn self-protective mechanism. And to top it off, the room is cold and dark. The dreaded worries and symptoms kick in.

 

There are several things you can do to make your "waking up" environment more pleasant. For example, get a radio alarm clock that wakes you up to your favorite music. Another alternative is an alarm clock that wakes you up gradually with pleasant chimes of increasing volume and frequency.

 

Keep a robe and slippers next to the bed so that you can warm up quickly and minimize a drop in body temperature as you get out of bed. If the bright lights of the room bother you, install a dimmer switch near your bed. You can gradually increase the light's intensity over a period of several minutes after you awaken.

 

Another reason why symptoms can be worse in the morning is because your blood sugar is low when you first wake up. You have gone all night without food. It's important to maintain a constant blood sugar level because the brain uses glucose as its fuel. If blood sugar levels are too low or drop too fast, then the brain starts running out of fuel. This causes the brain to trigger the "fight or flight" response.

 

The "fight or flight" response sends a rush of adrenaline, cortisol, and other neurotransmitters through your body to prepare you to fight or flee the perceived threat (low fuel). This process can trigger physical reactions ("symptoms") such as trembling, rapid heartbeat, sweating, panic attacks, fatigue, insomnia, mental confusion, nervousness, dizziness, and more.

 

To balance your blood sugar levels and minimize symptoms, keep a snack that contains "good" complex carbohydrates and protein by your bed. Eat it when you first wake up. You will likely notice that your symptoms improve shortly after eating the snack. You might try a combination of whole grain crackers and a handful of nuts, or a high-protein granola bar with some whole-wheat pretzels. The "good" carbohydrates will give you energy, and the protein will help to keep your blood sugar level steady over time.

 

Finally, dead-end thoughts play a huge role in creating early morning anxiety, as well as anxiety at any other time of day. Once you learn to overcome dead-end thoughts, you stop the anxiety cycle in its tracks.

 

Dead-end thoughts are negative, anxious, obsessive, or racing thoughts, that do not promote your well-being. They are based on faulty thinking patterns. These thoughts of helplessness, negativity, or anxious predictions about the future, give away your personal power and create the anxiety cycle. Here are a few examples of dead-end thoughts:

 

    * "I can't get out of bed feeling like this."

    * "Why do I feel this way? There must be something really wrong with me!"

    * "Everything is going to go wrong at the work meeting."

    * "It's a horrible day."

    * "When will this ever stop!"

 

The most important thing you can do to conquer early morning anxiety is to change how you PERCEIVE waking up. Change the dead-end thoughts that create the anxiety. Remember, physical symptoms by themselves are not anxiety. Negative perceptions are what create and perpetuate the anxiety cycle.

 

Choose to perceive waking up as a positive event - yes, you have a choice! Habitual dead-end thoughts can be unlearned and replaced with healthier self-talk. Of course, like any new skill you learn, it requires practice and patient persistence on your part to make healthier thoughts automatic.

 

Change your perception by creating a morning ritual that replaces the dead-end thoughts with healthier ones. Create a sequence of positive steps you can take when you first wake up to conquer early morning anxiety.

 

Positive rituals are helpful because they get you fully involved in the present moment (instead of the future), by focusing on one task at one time. Make the ritual automatic by taking the same steps every day in the same sequence. Here is an example of an anxiety-busting morning ritual. Use the ideas in this ritual as a starting off point to help you create your own personalized morning ritual.

 

    * Step 1: As you get ready for bed at night, place your alarm clock out of arm's reach from the bed. This action will motivate you to get out of bed to turn off the alarm when it rings the following morning.

 

      When the alarm rings, get out of bed immediately. Turn off the alarm and put on the robe next to your bed. As you do so, say aloud three times in an enthusiastic, cheery voice: "I am SO glad to be alive! What a WONDERFUL day!" Make sure to smile as you do this.

 

    * Step 2: Mentally and physically "check in" with the present moment. Accept any physical sensations without placing a negative judgment on them. Simply observe. Touch your face, hands, and legs a few times and observe the sensations. Focus intently on a few items in the room for several seconds. These simple activities help you to switch your focus from the future back to the present moment.

 

      If dead-end thoughts occur at this time (which they likely will), immediately replace them with healthier thoughts. It often helps to say the positive thoughts aloud. For example, if you're thinking: "I can't get out of bed feeling like this," replace it with: "These physical sensations might be uncomfortable, yet I know they are harmless. I am completely safe. I am physically able to get out of bed and have a great day. Watch. I can get out of bed just fine!" Then DO it!

 

    * Step 3: Turn on your favorite upbeat music CD. (Keep a CD player in your bedroom.) Sing along and dance for a minute or two.

 

    * Step 4: Eat the snack on your bedside table to help level your blood sugar.

 

    * Step 5: Take a shower and dress. Then continue with your day.

 

Once you find a pattern that works for you, use the same morning ritual -- the same steps in the same sequence -- every day. Repetition helps you to effectively unlearn old thoughts and behaviors and make the new ones automatic.

 

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I think many of us can go on and on, there are so many unpleasant experiences and I am surprised to remember many of them.

For the record the pattern of anxiety symptoms in the AM has manifested itself more frequently only recently--mainly b/c I have experienced less sleep during the past 2 weeks.  Until recently, I was fairly stable with my sleeping pattern (for about 5 weeks or so) and was getting enough rest to make steady improvement with all of the outlined symptoms I have listed in my posts.  In fact, for about 2 weeks straight I was doing very well until the last taper.  The sleeping issues surmounted when I went from .375 to .25 mg....

 

Yesterday I went back down to .25 mg.  I am going off this stuff within a month and will stick it out.  I plan to win this battle.

 

 

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Hi legend.

All of the symptoms you listed are quite "normal" during benzo withdrawal.  As you said they come and go and that may continue for a while.  Unfortunately goes with the territory.  Sleep issues are probably the most common - even now nearly two months benzo free my sleep is not great.  Most nights it's interrupted, but because I am able to sleep late in the mornings I get enough to keep me going most days.

 

Keep up the good work and keep moving towards being benzo free - I'm sure you'll win the battle you have such a positive attitude.

 

Guillermo, in response to your question about relaxation messages.  I was given some by my psychotherapist and a hypnotherapist I went to for a while.  I did download one from the web but it was with a program called Panic Away (paid for the whole printout, plus the disc.  I haven't looked around anywhere else but I'm sure they're about.  Good luck on your seach.

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The last few nights of sleep have been the worst that I can remember, as I don't think I have slept at all and notice the rest of my body--and my mind-- starting to break down slowly....its very discouraging but my will is still good. I was tempted to uptake significantly last night-but I didn't -that's how sleep deprived I am right now yet still have to go to work each morning and tough it out.  I refuse to take any prescribed meds but have taken dosages of Valerian root capsules and Chamomile tea in the past.  They are no longer helping me.  I find it amazing, even though I do not feel anxious at night I can be awake for this long.  This body will just not shut down.

 

Right now I am so exhausted that I believe my mind has shut down with my eyes open. It's also essentially what is happening when I'm in bed.  It's just zombie-like.  I am definitely feeling increased depersonalization as this streak continues.  There is genuine concern for my job since my productivity went down the craphole this week. 

 

The strangest thing is I can lay on my back and just when I am about to drift off to sleep I can hear myself snore lightly then wake up.  It's similar on my side except I do not snore, like a mechanism from the heart gets revved up suddenly.  I will get wired for several hours after that and it becomes a vicious cycle.  It's like something subconscious is preventing me from turning the light switch off.  I think there are some thoughts in my head about how some individuals never appear to get their sleep back, such as celebrities in the news, and become desperate. 

 

It also does not help when the wife thinks I should get off the forums and stop obsessing over this issue.  She is probably right about the obsessing part. 

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Hi Legend:

 

I'm here to respond to your request for stories about sleep during and after Clon withdrawal.  During my taper which was too fast and I don't recomend that, I did not sleep well at all.  The night would start with all sorts of horrible thoughts which I dwelt on far too much, eventtually I would fall asleep only to be jerked awake by adrenalin surges and more horrible thoughts.  Sometimes I would be awakened by being unable to breathe.  In those days I slept with a business channel on the television turned down very low so I would have to concentrate on it.  It seemed to help a lot.  I would also go outside and get good and cold and then come back to bed which helped.

 

After I finished my taper, I slept all the time.  Never very well, lots of jerking suddenly awake, but I wanted to go to bed at about 5:00 pm.

 

ntw

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Legend, your wife is partly right.  You can obsess too much during this journey - I know I did - kind of got into benzo overload.  Trouble is we feel so alone during this process any support and information we can get is very important to us.  Maybe step back a little and don't overload your mind with benzo stories, concentrate on your own journey.

 

Insomnia is probably the worst s/x in withdrawal and unfortunately there doesn't seem to be any real answer.  Just seems that it has to be worked through as best you can.  Don't know if you drink coffee or anything with caffeine, or alcohol, sometimes they can have an effect as can too much sugar.  For me eating anything with chilli or a lot of herbs seemed to rev my system up as well. 

 

Your sleep will return eventually, that's the best I can offer.  Sorry, must be hard when you have to perform in your job with little sleep. :-X

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Thank you for all the replies and info.

 

I decided to quit taking Clonazepam on 12/10.  Haven't taken since and its been about 4 days.  The first night I did not take I slept fairly well and have been sleeping better until last night.  Go figure.  I only got 4 hrs but better than most days last week.  I have my sleep hygiene fairly well regulated, ie no caffeine except in AM, hot showers, wind down an hr before bed, etc.

 

The most irritating things going on really have not changed when compared to taking the stuff, except I am more internally shaky and nervous than before, perhaps feeling a bit weaker.  In addition, the back of my tongue seems thick, which causes me to sometimes slur speech pronouncing certain words.  It comes and goes (maybe related to the disc bulge?)  I am a little worried about this.  It happened while I was on the meds, but I don't see too much reference to it here.

 

I am not going back and have no desire to.  As I said earlier I will ride this out as I am determined to take control of my life.

 

 

 

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Congratulations on being benzo free!!  That was quite a jump, but hey I jumped off of 10 milligrams of Klonopin so what can I say?

 

I just wanted to tell you that your symptoms sound very normal.  I can attest to the thickening of the tongue.  I had great difficulty talking, so much so that I cut talking out as much as possible.  The internal vibrations are normal too, so no worries there.

 

You can do this, you have a good attitude but be prepared for a wide variety of symptoms to pop up.  The good thing is that you can come here and tell us what they are and we can tell you if we've had them too.

 

Hang on....

 

Pam

 

Here's the link to your celebration thread! http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=16494.0

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Good day legend,

 

I have been wondering about the day when I actually quit taking the benzos for good. 

I am so happy to see that you aren't really feeling too bad, so far.

 

I think I have just built that day up in my mind way too much.

 

It hasn't come yet for me, but I need to continue to read the posts from other folks like yourself, who have decided they have had enough.

Hopefully, it will build up my confidence. 

 

Seems like your sleep issues have improved, which is good, and I can't say I've had the tongue problem yet, but who knows?

I definitely have some neck muscle issues that keep reoccurring, and are very irritating.

 

Thanks for keeping us posted, whether it's a good day or bad.  Your recovery is our recovery, too.

-David

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