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My Story: 50 Years on Benzos - Now FREE!


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What an inspiring story. Congratulations on your success and newfound health. However, I have a question when you say that your sleep collapsed. Are you sleeping okay now? or still struggling? I ask because as of now while I am tapering, I am taking amino acids and melatonin and they are working well on me; but I know I can't stay on these forever also; I wonder when I am done if I will be able to sleep without any aids.

 

Wish you the best! :smitten:

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Gabareceptors:

 

Sorry for not replying sooner, only just come across your post!

 

Yes, I have managed to get off the Mirtazepine with no problems at all.  Cut 15mg to 7.5 for 4 weeks, then to 3.75 for another 4 weeks then stopped.  So all is well now.  I sincerely hope you have the same success yourself.  :smitten:

Hi Susie  :hug: how long where you on the Mirtazapaine for?

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten: :smitten: :smitten:

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Hi again Susie  :hug: I have Another  question you said  in your story '' I always had to go back on them because I was so ill, so I would stabilise'' how long did it take you to stabilise? And was it a different amount of time or the same amount of time to stabilise each time you went back  on the Diazepam?  And did all you symptoms stabilise eventually ? Thanks  :)

 

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten: :smitten: :smitten:

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What an inspiring story. Congratulations on your success and newfound health. However, I have a question when you say that your sleep collapsed. Are you sleeping okay now? or still struggling? I ask because as of now while I am tapering, I am taking amino acids and melatonin and they are working well on me; but I know I can't stay on these forever also; I wonder when I am done if I will be able to sleep without any aids.

 

Wish you the best! :smitten:

 

I have no problems with sleep now to answer your question  :smitten:

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Gabareceptors:

 

Sorry for not replying sooner, only just come across your post!

 

Yes, I have managed to get off the Mirtazepine with no problems at all.  Cut 15mg to 7.5 for 4 weeks, then to 3.75 for another 4 weeks then stopped.  So all is well now.  I sincerely hope you have the same success yourself.  :smitten:

Hi Susie  :hug: how long where you on the Mirtazapaine for?

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten: :smitten: :smitten:

 

I was on Mirtazepine for 2 years after getting off the Diazepam Nova  :smitten:

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Hi again Susie  :hug: I have Another  question you said  in your story '' I always had to go back on them because I was so ill, so I would stabilise'' how long did it take you to stabilise? And was it a different amount of time or the same amount of time to stabilise each time you went back  on the Diazepam?  And did all you symptoms stabilise eventually ? Thanks  :)

 

 

 

Love Nova xxx  :smitten: :smitten: :smitten:

 

I didn't have any problems with stabilising to be honest and it only took a few days each time to feel well again.  Finding the right dose is key IMO.  I always updosed to 1mg above the dose I was taking  before I started a withdrawal.  I took this dose for one week and if I didn't feel well in that time I added another 1mg and so on until I did.  I was lucky in that I didn't have to go any higher than 2mg above the original dose on any occasion.  My problems were mainly the state I let myself get into in withdrawal because of the terror aspect of it messing with my mind (so I became terrified to swallow another one) but once I had got to the level of "you have a choice, either die or take them" somehow I decided to live was the better option.  When I rationalise it now I realise somewhere along the line we have a breaking point and once reached a decision has to be taken and we therefore make it in good faith.  :smitten:

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I was led to your story by another poster...OMG, you are a true inspiration and role model for persevering and making it through hell!!!

BLESS YOU!!!

 

Thank you dear Choco -- all the very best to you  :smitten:

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Wow wow Susie!!

I've been reading you're story several times now, so very impressed by You 💕👏

You are an inspiration to us all.

Thank you! I will read this again  :)

Wishing you all the very best in you're benzo free life  :smitten:

 

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Wow wow Susie!!

I've been reading you're story several times now, so very impressed by You 💕👏

You are an inspiration to us all.

Thank you! I will read this again  :)

Wishing you all the very best in you're benzo free life  :smitten:

 

Thank you Me2 that's very kind of you  :smitten:

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Susie just read your story! Wow! Absolutely awesome and inspiring!!  :thumbsup:  :smitten:

 

Thank you -- if it inspires to help someone I will be happy  :smitten:

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Hi Susie: I reread your story again, but this time I noticed 'Parker's Post' which I read for the first time. Also a very inspiring and informative post. Thanks for posting. I wonder if she is still active, how can I find her?

I am glad that you are okay, that you made it, and it gives us all so much hope http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/Smileys/standard/smitten.gif

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Hi Susie: I reread your story again, but this time I noticed 'Parker's Post' which I read for the first time. Also a very inspiring and informative post. Thanks for posting. I wonder if she is still active, how can I find her?

I am glad that you are okay, that you made it, and it gives us all so much hope http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/Smileys/standard/smitten.gif

 

Yes, she still comes on here occasionally.  If you send her a PM when she checks in she usually answers to my knowledge.  I put the link on my Profile because I feel her posts are excellent!  Click on Members at the top of your Profile, then type in Parker and all her posts will be shown.  :thumbsup:

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  • 3 months later...

Amazing story and heartbreaking at the same time.

How did you survive? Did you have family close by or did you live alone? You must of had horrid sxs!  When you would end up going back on, was it Ativan or Valium?

 

I have so many questions popping into my head. I have been on benzos for 30 years, Xanax but recently placed on K and wanting desperately to get of. I thought because I am now 57 years old, it would be extremely difficult but you have given me hope. I will talk to my Nurse Practitioner about Mirtazipine/ Remeron as sleep has more recently become an issue for me.

 

Thank you so much for posting this! I wish I could somehow bookmark it for inspiration.

Wishing you a wonderful life of freedom !!!

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Dear Susie, thank you so much for taking the time to share your story.  It will be 2 years for me in June. I've not shared my story yet (just to horrifying).

 

Don't you wish we had Google back in the day?!!! Anyway Heart Felt Wishes To You :smitten:

 

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  • 3 weeks later...

Amazing story and heartbreaking at the same time.

How did you survive? Did you have family close by or did you live alone? You must of had horrid sxs!  When you would end up going back on, was it Ativan or Valium?

 

I have so many questions popping into my head. I have been on benzos for 30 years, Xanax but recently placed on K and wanting desperately to get of. I thought because I am now 57 years old, it would be extremely difficult but you have given me hope. I will talk to my Nurse Practitioner about Mirtazipine/ Remeron as sleep has more recently become an issue for me.

 

Thank you so much for posting this! I wish I could somehow bookmark it for inspiration.

Wishing you a wonderful life of freedom !!!

 

Sorry I haven't replied sooner, only just come across the replies -- I didn't have anyone close by so I was alone in all of this!  When I had to go back on it was Diazepam (Valium) -- thank you for your kind words and I wish you all the best  :smitten:

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Dear Susie, thank you so much for taking the time to share your story.  It will be 2 years for me in June. I've not shared my story yet (just to horrifying).

 

Don't you wish we had Google back in the day?!!! Anyway Heart Felt Wishes To You :smitten:

 

Thank you so much -- yes, Google would have been good  :smitten: -- all the very best to you  :tickedoff:

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Amazing story and heartbreaking at the same time.

How did you survive? Did you have family close by or did you live alone? You must of had horrid sxs!  When you would end up going back on, was it Ativan or Valium?

 

I have so many questions popping into my head. I have been on benzos for 30 years, Xanax but recently placed on K and wanting desperately to get of. I thought because I am now 57 years old, it would be extremely difficult but you have given me hope. I will talk to my Nurse Practitioner about Mirtazipine/ Remeron as sleep has more recently become an issue for me.

 

Thank you so much for posting this! I wish I could somehow bookmark it for inspiration.

Wishing you a wonderful life of freedom !!!

 

Sorry I haven't replied sooner, only just come across the replies -- I didn't have anyone close by so I was alone in all of this!  When I had to go back on it was Diazepam (Valium) -- thank you for your kind words and I wish you all the best  :smitten:

Hi Susie and Mellow  :hug: I'm 57 as well, no children and also am all alone , have an upstairs neighbour from hell, continual stress outside my control  and  the only person that calls to my home is the food  delivery guy once a week.  And no one ever rings or texts to see how I am its been that way for years as I was also Over 10 year's in unbeknown severe tolerance withdrawal on my prescribed dose. I don't buy into it happening when your tapering and have to hold that's just plain withdrawal symptoms continuing.  My taper has been  3 year's of continuous hell on top and I had to updose as a matter of survival and am holding as I'm still very unstable and symptomatic.

 

Anyway Susie, I'd like to say thank you so much for posting the above  :hug: your the ONLY person that I've seen write a success story that went thought it alone, everyone else makes a big point of having at least one person you can rely on to help you thorough this. How its essential to have your family and friends there all the way, unfortunately for many of us that's not a choice we have through no fault of our own, Benzos have cost so many of us everything. And it make me feel even worse when I see people continuously listing 'Surround yourself with family and friends"" as a big point towards recovery but you've done it solo so it proves that that's not the case at all.  Thank you again  :hug:

 

 

 

 

Love Nova xxx :smitten: :smitten: :smitten:

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Ah, CosmicCircle, I'd recommend Success Stories over Youtube horror stories any day! Stick with the good news stories like this wonderful one.  :)
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Amazing story and heartbreaking at the same time.

How did you survive? Did you have family close by or did you live alone? You must of had horrid sxs!  When you would end up going back on, was it Ativan or Valium?

 

I have so many questions popping into my head. I have been on benzos for 30 years, Xanax but recently placed on K and wanting desperately to get of. I thought because I am now 57 years old, it would be extremely difficult but you have given me hope. I will talk to my Nurse Practitioner about Mirtazipine/ Remeron as sleep has more recently become an issue for me.

 

Thank you so much for posting this! I wish I could somehow bookmark it for inspiration.

Wishing you a wonderful life of freedom !!!

 

Sorry I haven't replied sooner, only just come across the replies -- I didn't have anyone close by so I was alone in all of this!  When I had to go back on it was Diazepam (Valium) -- thank you for your kind words and I wish you all the best  :smitten:

Hi Susie and Mellow  :hug: I'm 57 as well, no children and also am all alone , have an upstairs neighbour from hell, continual stress outside my control  and  the only person that calls to my home is the food  delivery guy once a week.  And no one ever rings or texts to see how I am its been that way for years as I was also Over 10 year's in unbeknown severe tolerance withdrawal on my prescribed dose. I don't buy into it happening when your tapering and have to hold that's just plain withdrawal symptoms continuing.  My taper has been  3 year's of continuous hell on top and I had to updose as a matter of survival and am holding as I'm still very unstable and symptomatic.

 

Anyway Susie, I'd like to say thank you so much for posting the above  :hug: your the ONLY person that I've seen write a success story that went thought it alone, everyone else makes a big point of having at least one person you can rely on to help you thorough this. How its essential to have your family and friends there all the way, unfortunately for many of us that's not a choice we have through no fault of our own, Benzos have cost so many of us everything. And it make me feel even worse when I see people continuously listing 'Surround yourself with family and friends"" as a big point towards recovery but you've done it solo so it proves that that's not the case at all.  Thank you again  :hug:

 

 

 

 

Love Nova xxx :smitten: :smitten: :smitten:

 

Well Nova, I don't think anyone who hasn't been through this horror could understand for one moment exactly what we have been through so really it was inconsequential and mattered little that I had to go through it alone!  It's a difficult and lonely path that we tread but you will succeed and come out of it at the end of the day -- so stick with your plan, take each day as it comes and one day you will be free forever and feel well again.  I send you my very sincere best wishes for your recovery and better life in the future.  The secret for me was to hold after each cut until I felt well enough to push on to the next stage and it really doesn't matter how long that is so long as you get there in the end :smitten:  :smitten:  :smitten:

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  • 4 weeks later...

Hi Susie: Your story is so inspirational and always ceases to amaze your journey to freedom. I would like to ask you, if you don't mind, I assume you also had to wean off the Mirtazapine, correct? Was it hard to come off it? How do you handle sleep and depression now? I ask because I am going through a rough spot in my tapering right now with depression and insomnia. I have never taken antidepressants in my life, and I hope I won't have to resort to one; but at this point, I wonder if it would be beneficial. I have taken Ativan for 18 months only, but still coming off of it's kicking my butt. This is my second attempt.

Wish you continue healing. You are a true warrior and give us so much hope!

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