I'm so glad you got it checked again, that's pretty high. I had to go on Clonodine right after my CT, so I know high blood pressure is possible. I'm glad you've got a team of Dr's you're working with and it sounds like you trust them. Try not to worry about the weight right now, there's plenty of time to lose it when you're healed.
I had a panic attack in front of my girlfriend, I know we don't want people to see this, especially our kids. Trust me when I say that you're doing the right thing by getting off of this drug. When you're healed you're going to be present in your children's lives. You won't be flatlining and you'll feel the joy of them every day. Sorry for the rant, but I feel strongly that we miss too much when we're all drugged up.
Hang on, you can do this...one step, one day, one minute at a time.