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Hi all

What were your symptoms when you were unstable ?

 

Right now, I still have fear of leaving the house

Even leaving my bed

I have heart palpitations sometimes

Fear of permanent damage

Fear of needing more and more.valium to calm.my anxiety

 

I so want to be stable on it. No tolerance and slowly taper over years after my perimenaupose.

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Jwl, I slept 16 hours today.

I  am 5ft2 and 107lbs, lost 18lbs in the last 4 months.

I feel like 9mg of valium is building at a toxic level in my body.

Or maybe it is just my fear.

I keep nodding off during the day and been waken up in panic. I wish I was stable on it like you.

Only to think about tapering brought back some symptoms,  jerking,  teeth chattering. I feel stuck.

 

We all want to get off of this evil drug Jasmine. If there was a magic pill I could've taken 6 years ago  I would've taken it. Unfortunately, I learned the hard way that we can only go as fast as our bodies will allow. I'm sure the Valium isn't "building at a toxic level" in your body. It may be making you tired but it's not what's causing your low BP which is probably the main reason you're so tired.

 

BTW it took me a long time and a lot of mistakes to get "stable". 

 

Whenever I felt "stuck", I found that the best course of action was to hold, be patient, and carefully plan what I'm going to do next. Never make a decision out of desperation or panic.

 

JWL, what was your symptoms when you cut too fast, how much did you cut?

I can't get out of bed. I have fear of being outside my bed or maybe depression.

I also developed some ptsd symptoms.  When I think about valium withdrawals,  I have shaking.

Sleep has been good though. No cortidol surge last night.

 

My symptoms were very much like what you were experiencing: anxiety, insomnia, brain fog ,fear.

 

No more cortisol surges? That's wonderful! It seemed like that was one of your worst symptoms. You have come so far.

 

Fear is normal because your feel good, positive thinking neurotransmitters are being suppressed.

 

I think what you experienced was a glutamate storm caused by MSG. It's like a chain reaction where your brain cells release too much glutamate. Vit C is good in that it suppresses this release. It's going to take time but it seems like your body is already stabilizing.

 

Try not to get so stressed about tapering. You will reach a point where the fear will subside and you'll feel confident about tapering. In the meantime I would just hold

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Jwl, how a head concussion can cause glutamate storm for you?

Did you micro taper steadily from the start?

 

I don't remember why head trauma causes the release of glutamate. I think it's trying to protect the brain but it gets out of hand and causes a chain reaction where one cell causes another to release it and then there's too much. I wouldn't worry, yours was pretty mild compared to what I experienced.

 

No I didn't start micro tapering at the start and that's where I ran into trouble.

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Good morning LHSG hoping everyone has a better day.

I am so happy to see this little group thriving woohoo 🎊🎉.

Morning Twiny so happy to read you are going out and about well done.lt just goes to show we can and do adapt to any situation.l think you are probably as safe in a restaurant as anywhere else.We must find ways to live life and still keep ourselves safe.Must say you went a hell of a distance for a Yankee candle 🕯️ 🤔. Almost every shop you go into here has them.l only burn them if l am having visiters so one can last a very long time.l hope you continue to feel good my lovely and remember not to overstretch yourself please.Give my bil a big hug from me and take one for yourself.love you my lST X

Morning Jasmine l would have to agree with lwt l don't think this is the time to be cutting your benzo.l don't think you are stable at this stage.l know your pulse is slow however your bp is fine.I would imagine the diazepam is slowing your pulse however it will probably fluctuate during the day.Try not to stay in bed honey and also try to do some exercise.Please try not to fixate on the future my love this is now about getting you to a point where you are feeling well enough to move forward.l also believe you are still not stable on your ad you need at least two months before you start to feel the benefit.Hang in there.love you.X

Morning Ginger good luck with the giving blood today my lovely.l hope all goes smoothly for you.l don't give blood so woohoo to you.How have you been? love you.X

Morning Meems l really hope Romeo comes back although there is probably a cat on heat near by so probably not for a while.l hope your anxiety has started to decrease? love you.X

Morning Suzy how's the mouth? Your mother sounds as though she has foot and mouth disorder l know a lot of people like that 😁.As you don't have kids l will say it is a full-time job pissing my daughter off 😏.l just have to open my mouth and she gets pissed off at times 😡.Anyhoo just ignore her at least it's not just you.Love you.X

Morning LWT have you resumed  your taper?l hope everything goes smoothly for you honey.l can't see why not.love you.X

Morning  JLAV I think you are getting a lot of good advice here.POT's is definitely quite a common withdrawal symptom here.I agree with Trishy keep your fluid levels up and get up very slowly.Also compression socks help.Try not to worry too much honey.love you.X

  Morning NJ l am happy to hear your son is improving that is good news.l do believe you are suffering ibs it definitely has all the traits of that.l have had ibs since l was in my 20 's and for me diet is key.Take time now my love you work out what you need to add or take out of your diet that can help you.lt is all very much trial and error however well worth the effort.love you.X

. Morning Lady Mary,GP, Olive Intend Gilly Valley Free Troch Val Final Bill Miyu NJ and everyone here sending you my love.X

Hey Twin!  :yippee: :yippee: I love to see that you've posted as you know I'm a fan!  :laugh::D

Yes , I'm out and about trying to live best I can during these awful times of covid. So stressful but I find busy is the best thing for me.

I had my grandkids over this afternoon for lunch and a swim and before ya know it I was building a fort out of blankets and telling G rated ghost stories under the blanket with flashlights  :laugh: :laugh: those kids have me right where they want me, in the palm of their tiny hands :smitten:

Lots going on right though Stut with my kids and sending the little ones to school. My daughter has to leave her job bc she won't send my granddaughter to school she's too afraid and the schools are doing what they call a hybrid plan. Half the kids will go to school for two days then Wednesday will be no school for a deep clean then the other half that didn't go Monday and Tuesday will go Thursday and Friday. When the kids are home for 3 days of the school week they'll do on line learning. 🤦‍♀️ I This also applies to my grandson and his school. I have no idea how my son and daughter in law are going to do this either. It's a confusing mess and I can't help them with this. I will be taking my infant grandson Nicholas and watching him, I can't take the other two while they learn online and watch an infant it's just not possible. That would really be stretching myself way to thin. I feel guilty about it but I can only do what I can do. Anyway is your head spinning after all that mine is  :idiot:

Well my dear friend I will certainly give your bil a hug and I will absolutely take one for myself bc I certainly could use one right about now.

I hope you're doing ok. Are you getting out? I hope you're doing things for just you. How's your little visitor coming along?  Life is hard isn't it? ... Gotta enjoy every good minute we can get in this life.

Love you much!

LST ❤️

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Hey guys! I hope everyone is doing well! My first post in months after a rollercoaster the last couple of months which made me updose back to 40mg from 30mg. I'm taking it low and slow now i hope a 5% cut will be more tolerable than a 25% one. One week in so far so good:)

 

Anyway I hope everyone is getting through the pandemic and well.

 

MMXV

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Hi all

I felt good enough to get up from my bed and bake a cake and cook dinner for the kids yesterday But forgot to make myself diner. I took some but C and magnesium.  I don't know what what what. But u had terrible shaking in the middle of the night.  It seems that the shaking and teeth chattering is back.like my body demands more valium. Oh gosh, I hope that I won't be in this state for the rest of my life. Shaking like aleaf. I woke up in panic, thought my heart was going to stop.

Will I ever feel okay again?

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Trying:

So yesterday was day 2...cramping showed up but was not like prior months. Still no depression/crying. Some anxiety. Actual was kind of

manic-y( kinda like a high?)  for like 3 hrs last night but it went.

 

Its morning now. (day 3)..dealing with some loopy thoughts/discoordination, some anxiety (typical morning)but all in all I'm not feeling that

"I'm in acute/trainwreck" feeling. Not psychotic at all!

I feel like I'm still waiting for a bomb to drop - but theres no bomb...weird. So fingers crossed  :thumbsup:

 

Thanks for checking in on me!!

 

Hows everyone else doing?

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Trina, I think you described it so well... waiting for the bomb to drop but there’s no bomb. That’s how my period was this time around too. Glad things seem to be going ok for you!  :smitten:
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Hi all

I felt good enough to get up from my bed and bake a cake and cook dinner for the kids yesterday But forgot to make myself diner. I took some but C and magnesium.  I don't know what what what. But u had terrible shaking in the middle of the night.  It seems that the shaking and teeth chattering is back.like my body demands more valium. Oh gosh, I hope that I won't be in this state for the rest of my life. Shaking like aleaf. I woke up in panic, thought my heart was going to stop.

Will I ever feel okay again?

 

Yes you will Jasmine.  Time and patience, and no cutting while having any rough symptoms.  Take your time, let your brain and central nervous system stabilize.  I know it's scary, we are here with you.  😘😘🙏🙏😷😷😷😷

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Hey guys! I hope everyone is doing well! My first post in months after a rollercoaster the last couple of months which made me updose back to 40mg from 30mg. I'm taking it low and slow now i hope a 5% cut will be more tolerable than a 25% one. One week in so far so good:)

 

Anyway I hope everyone is getting through the pandemic and well.

 

MMXV

 

Glad to see you back MMXV, definitely no more 25% cuts.  I am sure that was a roller coaster.  Glad you are feeling better, take your time.  Hope you staying safe also.  Pandemic is making many people's anxiety worse,  :(.  Even people not going through wd.  Keep us posted on how you are doing  ;):D.  Mary

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Hi everyone,

Had a panic attack last night.. oh well what can ya do I guess they don't go away forever.

Peace and healing people

Trish

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Hi all

I felt good enough to get up from my bed and bake a cake and cook dinner for the kids yesterday But forgot to make myself diner. I took some but C and magnesium.  I don't know what what what. But u had terrible shaking in the middle of the night.  It seems that the shaking and teeth chattering is back.like my body demands more valium. Oh gosh, I hope that I won't be in this state for the rest of my life. Shaking like aleaf. I woke up in panic, thought my heart was going to stop.

Will I ever feel okay again?

 

I heard that Magnesium can rev some people up. Maybe it would be best not to take anything until you feel better. Or if you do just start with one thing at the lowest dose so you can see how your body reacts. If you take multiple supplements you don't know what's causing what.

 

It sucks how one day you're doing good and the next is hell but that's the nature of this beast. It's up and down. That's why you should give yourself a good while before you start tapering

 

Hang in there. You're doing so much better than a week or so ago

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That's awesome tt! Were not to far from eachother! I love Conneticut too! Yankee Candle is the best! I have to get some candles in out! Jim's burning nasty incense,  ugh. I went out to lunch last week. It was strange, I was a little nervous and my mother wasn't worried so I was calm. Glad your out having fun! I feel my sx are worse when I'm home. If I can get out Its so nice!!!!

 

Haha, meems I do that all the time! Romeo will be back. He's probably hunting, lol

Hi DD,

I love Deerfield and the Yankee candle store there, it's so big and I love the little Christmas/ Halloween village inside. It's a nice day trip. I used to go a lot more often but life changes.

I hope you're doing ok girl. I'm having palps like crazy and fatigue. Had a panic attack last night but can't complain it's been a long time since I've had one so ..🤷 Just trying to do the best I can with every day.

I know what you mean about being nervous in a restaurant. It was too nerve wracking for me I don't think I'll do it again. 😱

TT, ❤️❤️❤️

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author=Stut 55 link=topic=153201.msg3118138#msg3118138 date=1597223541]

Good morning  :mybuddy:  and thank you M AS  :hug:

 

                                                          Love Nova  xxx :smitten: :smitten: :smitten: ( PS Ask that fat lady to start bloody singing NOW please :laugh:)

💖😍.l have Trishy warming up her vocal cords so she should be singing very soon 😏😇. Love you my AS.Xo

 

AARRGGHHH!!!!!!  :D not Trishy singing please!!!!!!!!  :o I am  suffering enough here thank you....  :laugh: :laugh: :laugh:

xox  :smitten: :smitten: :smitten:

I'm hardly the fat lady yet my twin.. But I'll let ya know when I get there :laugh: :laugh:

Nova , I can break glass when I sing you'd be right not to want me. Funny, reminds me of the days of American idol my best friend and I used to kid around and sing in my car while out and about and we would say " look out Simon here we come next American idol's" .. Those were the good ol days before  benzo tapering 😔

✌️❤️

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That's sounds like a great day. I lo ve wandering around in shops! My heart palps stopped today! Shhhhh, lol. Usually in the afternoon, boom boom boom. I5s like your heart is in your throat. I wasn't sure if it was panic attacks, pots, idk. Out of nowhere.  It's crazy. Omg. I seriously want this over.  I'm beat. Today was depression and no will to do a thing. A really pitiful attitude. Everything feels pointless. It's not people it's just a feeling. I dont like it, it's not me. 8m peppy and happy .like you. 🙏
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For those on valium.  How was your sleep before your taper?

I am still.shaking and have anxiety. When you stabilize , they should go away right?

Like right now, going to the grocery store would give me a panic attack.

Thank you all for your support!

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Hi everyone,

Had a panic attack last night.. oh well what can ya do I guess they don't go away forever.

Peace and healing people

Trish

 

Hey woman, I am having them too, put it's weird, just the heart part and they last about 15 minutes, which still sucks.  I bet a lot of people are having them right now.  Hope you don't have anymore!

I have a Dr appointment Monday just to make sure that's all it is, but I am pretty positive it's wd. :( :(

I read about your weekend, glad you had a good time 🙋🏼🙋🏼🙋🏼😘😷🙏♥️😘😷🙏♥️🙏🙏🙏

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For those on valium.  How was your sleep before your taper?

I am still.shaking and have anxiety. When you stabilize , they should go away right?

Like right now, going to the grocery store would give me a panic attack.

Thank you all for your support!

 

If you are really stabilized, they should go away.  But everyone is different, no one can say Jasmine, yes that will go away, because everyone is so different.  But hopefully they would go away if you hold long enough.  :)

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Jasmine, you will get better. You are still in the early days of reinstating. I can tell you that it’s been a roller coaster ride for me since I reinstated, but I am definitely better than when I crashed back in October last year. We also have to contend with our hormonal fluctuations each month which for me is when my symptoms are by far the worst. When that time comes I know to be as gentle with myself as possible and try to limit my stress as much as possible.
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That's sounds like a great day. I lo ve wandering around in shops! My heart palps stopped today! Shhhhh, lol. Usually in the afternoon, boom boom boom. I5s like your heart is in your throat. I wasn't sure if it was panic attacks, pots, idk. Out of nowhere.  It's crazy. Omg. I seriously want this over.  I'm beat. Today was depression and no will to do a thing. A really pitiful attitude. Everything feels pointless. It's not people it's just a feeling. I dont like it, it's not me. 8m peppy and happy .like you. 🙏

Fingers crossed for you DD. I sympathize with those palps they really suck.

I feel same way today. Didn't do anything really. I watched TV mostly.

As for peppy and happy not like pre taper days. I just grab the good ones when I can get them. It's nice to get out and feel somewhat normal. I am usually always babysitting and never get the chance to go out. If I can get out here and there and on weekends I jump on it. Life is just not the same since the taper but I've learned to adapt to my " new" normal as best as I can.

But I'm with you today just blah  :P  :smitten: :smitten:

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Hi everyone,

Had a panic attack last night.. oh well what can ya do I guess they don't go away forever.

Peace and healing people

Trish

 

Hey woman, I am having them too, put it's weird, just the heart part and they last about 15 minutes, which still sucks.  I bet a lot of people are having them right now.  Hope you don't have anymore!

I have a Dr appointment Monday just to make sure that's all it is, but I am pretty positive it's wd. :( :(

I read about your weekend, glad you had a good time 🙋🏼🙋🏼🙋🏼😘😷🙏♥️😘😷🙏♥️🙏🙏🙏

Good luck at the Drs Mary, I thought that was coming up. I'm sure it is wd but it'll be nice to get that confirmed for peace of mind. I'm sure mine is wd and diet Coke. I'm having a hard time cutting back on that. I just tired of having to change everything for the sake of bwd. This whole process of tapering really becomes daunting after doing it for so long and then knowing you have a long way to go yet..I know you get what I'm saying. Ahhh well it is what it is.

My weekend was very nice. It's nice to get out when I can. I feel like a kid in a candy store when I get out. I'm usually always doing for my kids with babysitting and whatever they need so when I get the chance to just have an " adult" day I jump for joy lol!

Well girl I hope your palps let up bc I know how uncomfortable and unnerving they can be. 👋🙏🙏❤️❤️❤️ :mybuddy:

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Hi everyone,

Had a panic attack last night.. oh well what can ya do I guess they don't go away forever.

Peace and healing people

Trish

 

Hey woman, I am having them too, put it's weird, just the heart part and they last about 15 minutes, which still sucks.  I bet a lot of people are having them right now.  Hope you don't have anymore!

I have a Dr appointment Monday just to make sure that's all it is, but I am pretty positive it's wd. :( :(

I read about your weekend, glad you had a good time 🙋🏼🙋🏼🙋🏼😘😷🙏♥️😘😷🙏♥️🙏🙏🙏

Good luck at the Drs Mary, I thought that was coming up. I'm sure it is wd but it'll be nice to get that confirmed for peace of mind. I'm sure mine is wd and diet Coke. I'm having a hard time cutting back on that. I just tired of having to change everything for the sake of bwd. This whole process of tapering really becomes daunting after doing it for so long and then knowing you have a long way to go yet..I know you get what I'm saying. Ahhh well it is what it is.

My weekend was very nice. It's nice to get out when I can. I feel like a kid in a candy store when I get out. I'm usually always doing for my kids with babysitting and whatever they need so when I get the chance to just have an " adult" day I jump for joy lol!

Well girl I hope your palps let up bc I know how uncomfortable and unnerving they can be. 👋🙏🙏❤️❤️❤️ :mybuddy:

And I hope no more panic attacks for you, love ya TT 🙋🏼🙋🏼.    🙏😘♥️😷😷😷😷🙏

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