Author Topic: What do you do when ......  (Read 3818 times)

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #20 on: May 07, 2009, 08:34:52 pm »
If we moved back in with my husband, it wouldn't be until around the first of August. I just found out that my daughter signed up for some courses at the local JC and she won't be done until the end of July.

There are actually two 45 year old men living here. I was talking to the 45 year old friend today. He was mentioning how much money he could be making if he went back to his old line of work. I asked him why he didn't go back. He said it was because he makes out better financially here and doesn't have to do nearly as much work. Well, to run the girls to and from school, clean house once a week, mow the lawn once a week is not all that much work. Sis fills up his gas tank, pays for his truck insurance, gives him about $300/mo spending money, room and board. He's got it pretty cushy.

I know saying "it's ok and it will be better" is what I'm supposed to say, but your situation sucks girlfriend!   :pokey:   I wish I had something positive to just spit out and make you realize how good life is.  :-\   Unfortunately I'm in a mental funk myself.   Instead I'll include a few more words to "the man" on your behalf!    :thumbsup:

I know it doesn't seem like it when in the middle of a trial, but he will show you a way!  ::)   Alot of people pray for healing and cry he isn't listening.  Then one of those waves of "healing" slap them in the face and most don't even realize their prayers are being answered!   Whether it slaps you in the face or not, he will answer so keep your eyes open!    :hug:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #21 on: May 08, 2009, 04:17:34 am »
 Alot of people pray for healing and cry he isn't listening.  Then one of those waves of "healing" slap them in the face and most don't even realize their prayers are being answered!   Whether it slaps you in the face or not, he will answer so keep your eyes open!    :hug:

So very true!! :thumbsup:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #22 on: May 18, 2009, 06:17:42 am »
Just an update. As of June 11th my daughter and I will be homeless.

There are a lot of problems with the guys who live here doing drugs. I mentioned it to my dad because he owns the house. My sister denied it could have happened on the property. My dad believed her.

We could go back to my daughter's father in Indiana. We could attempt to make the marriage work. He talks to my family all the time now. They tell me that he has changed. It was an abusive marriage. I'm not sure if he has changed and I'm just holding onto resentments, or if these are red flags that need to be taken seriously.

I'm at .5 mgs. of Klonopin a day.

 :oXo:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #23 on: May 18, 2009, 06:52:08 am »
 :therethere: I'm sorry [...]!
There are programs out there that can help you and your daughter until your back on your feet. I'm sure you could get some kind of assistance. I'd hate for you to have to go back to your husband just because you have no where else to go, especially if it could be an abusive relationship.  :(

Keep going on that taper! Your doing great  :thumbsup:

Amanda  :smitten:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #24 on: May 19, 2009, 01:04:36 pm »
Hey [...],

My heart goes out to you right now -- no one should have to face homelessness. I found this info for the San Fran Bay area should you need contact info:

CONTINUUM OF CARE (CoC)
Homeless Assistance Programs - Bay Area
San Francisco Regional Office
600 Harrison Street
San Francisco, CA 94107
415-489-6400
415-489-6601

I used to work for a supportive housing non-profit and do know that there are resources out there to help you and your daughter. Best wishes and many blessings.

Kelley
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #25 on: May 19, 2009, 01:13:52 pm »
Just a p.s. [...] -- the numbers I gave you may not be the perfect contacts, but if you briefly summarize your situation to them, they should be able to connect you with the right service agency ... I truly pray this helps out.

Kelley
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #26 on: May 19, 2009, 06:19:16 pm »
Hey [...],

Stopping by to see how you're doing.  I'm so sorry it's come to where you'll have no choice as to when to move.   :hug:

Maybe the information Kelley gave you will be the start to an answer.  Keep us posted as much as you can as to what is going on.  I hope you don't have to move back in with the ex because of no other option.  Going back would be fine and dandy if he indeed changed and that is what you wanted.  I do hope you and your daughter find a nice comfy home to call your own soon!   

Praying for both of you!   :smitten:


Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #27 on: May 19, 2009, 11:29:52 pm »
My daughter's father will be out on June 19 and he is going to drive us back to IN. He works at O'Hare in Chicago and has an apt. there. He is going to just stay in the apt. and we'll live in the house near Indianapolis. Now I just need help packing and I'm not getting any, not even from my 16 year old daughter who wants to move back there ASAP.

That does leave us with a week of  nowhere to live. I have two friends in NA who've said they could see about putting us up.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #28 on: May 21, 2009, 06:46:31 am »
Hello [...],

I'm so sorry for all you've been going through and are going through now. I hope you don't mind me coming in like this but going through w/d is hard enough and your daughter is old enough to be helping you with packing to say the least. I'd tell her that if she doesn't want to be out on the street and is in such a hurry to go back to live where you're going, that you are in desperate need now for her to be the daughter you need and help you with packing because you're to stressed and ill to do it alone. And that is that. Maybe just kind of put a little fear in her and let her know how sick you are, how hard you're trying to get the poisons out of you. Talk to her about how bad these drugs are and that their even harder to w/d from than heroin which is true.

I just know that from being sick throughout my kids growing up, even though they were difficult at that age, I never tried to hide anything from them, and my daughter knew how sick I was so if I stressed just how bad it was for me that I needed her to do something for me, she would do it. And she wasn't an easy kid either, but she'd always help me when needed.

I pray that God Blesses you also, sending you more angels to surround you with the strength you need and healing angels also. I always ask my angels for whatever help I need as that is what they are there for just waiting for us to ask also, as God needs some help also ;) :angel: :angel: :angel:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #29 on: May 25, 2009, 04:03:54 pm »
Hi Scooter and everyone else.

You are right, I'll have to take a harder stance with my daughter. She is working, going to school and studying for finals. However, I've only asked for the bare minimum of help from her. I've asked her to bring me boxes and tape and to pack two lamps for me. Once she brought me boxes and twice she has brought home tape. She hasn't packed up either lamp yet. Now, this is easier for her than you'd think because she works for a UPS store. They have boxes and tape lying all around the store that the owners just throw away because they can't use them for shipping. I used to work for this UPS store. I know that it doesn't take that long to package these types of lamps for shipping purposes (where they will get tossed onto conveyer belts, pushed around, etc.) This is being packed to be placed in the back of a truck. It doesn't take that long, but she is being stubborn. I know she has a lot on her plate, but packaging these lamps will only take about 15-20 minutes of her time for each lamp. It only takes her a minute or so to grap boxes and tape on her way out the door.

I told her that when we move to Indiana, I'm going to need a lot of help from her. I feel bad laying that on her because I don't want her to have to take care of me at this young age. A friend of mine pointed out that her husband is in a wheelchair (MS) and her son (same age as my daughter) has to help take care of him and that he is basically watching his father die. Not an easy thing to do. However, families - kids included - have to help each other out. Then I thought back to my own childhood and how I had to take care of my mom while she was suicidal, drinking, etc. I started having to take care of her when I was about 12. Then I realized that my own daughter, 16, doesn't have life all that bad.

She seems to have a better understanding now.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.