Author Topic: What do you do when ......  (Read 3795 times)

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #10 on: April 30, 2009, 01:26:21 am »
Hey [...],

Sounds like the marriage issue is pretty much decided for you at the moment.  If you have to move back in with your husband, try to approach it with the same optimism you're putting into the benzos.  I dont' know the situation behind your separation, but is he the type of person to give support to you?  Could he possibly be helpful in any way? 

I don't know for sure. I left him due to emotional abuse. However, to be honest, I'm pretty much in the same situation here...... only there are also illegal activities going on in this home.  He has been getting counseling.

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This is the "Titration Tapers" section of the forum.  There it gives all the information to explain titrating.   :thumbsup:
http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?board=56.0       

Good luck whichever way you go! 


Phyllis    :smitten:

Thank you Phyllis.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #11 on: April 30, 2009, 03:34:52 am »
[...], my heart goes out to you and your daughter.  You are in my prayers.

TS
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #12 on: May 02, 2009, 03:42:35 pm »
Hey [...],

Just wanted to check on you and see if you've made any decisions regarding going back home, and to see how you are feeling.

I know the emotional abuse all too well.  Maybe since he's getting counselling, it's a good sign he's willing to make an effort!    :thumbsup:     Staying there, if it isn't any better wouldn't be the best thing for you either. 

Keeping you in my prayers for a speedy recovery, and a peaceful and loving home to live in!     :hug:

Hope you have a good weekend!


Phyllis     :smitten:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #13 on: May 02, 2009, 04:35:23 pm »
Thank you Phyllis. I really haven't made a decision yet. Having to wait on my sister hand and foot really hasn't given me much time to think. When I do have the time to think, I'm so worn out that I can't get my mind to think clearly.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #14 on: May 04, 2009, 07:15:28 pm »
Hey [...],

I'm hoping you've managed to find some "me time" since your last post.     :hug:

Sending lots of prayers and good thoughts your way!


Phyllis    :smitten:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #15 on: May 05, 2009, 12:41:16 am »
Hi Phyllis, I haven't really found any alone time and I'm having a hard time because I have to sleep on the couch. I'm not getting enough sleep because my sister's boyfriend stays up and makes snacks, watches TV, etc. Their friend who lives here does the same things. Also, they let their daughters sleep where ever they feel like it and half the time that's on the living room couch. I have had to get on them about that in the past. When I get upset they start respecting that boundary for a time, then they eventually go back to ingoring my needs for sleep.  :-[

No time for alone time today. My sister's youngest is turning nine today. I told her that I would make her whatever she wanted for supper, but so far she hasn't told me what she wants. It's 5:40 pm here. I have a meeting that I'm supposed to be to at 7:30. It's an NA meeting. It doesn't look like I'm going to get to go because I haven't even been able to start supper.  :'(

 :oXo:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #16 on: May 05, 2009, 02:38:59 pm »
How much longer do you think your sister will really need you??      ???

I know it's hard to think of leaving if she needs your help, but you also have to think of [...]! (not to mention your daughter!)

If your sister has a boyfriend, and a 9yr old, why can't anyone else take over?  Once the worst part of her recovery is past, they couldn't help her the rest of the way??   Who is supposed to take care of you when you are the one run down?

I sure hope something works out soon for you!

Keeping you in my prayers!    :smitten:

Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #17 on: May 06, 2009, 05:26:44 am »
How much longer do you think your sister will really need you??      ???

She really doesn't anymore. I refused to lift a finger today and she has done just about everything by herself.

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I know it's hard to think of leaving if she needs your help, but you also have to think of [...]! (not to mention your daughter!)

She told me that I have until the end of the school year to find another place to live. We're leaving, I'm just not sure where we're going.

Quote
If your sister has a boyfriend, and a 9yr old, why can't anyone else take over?  Once the worst part of her recovery is past, they couldn't help her the rest of the way??   Who is supposed to take care of you when you are the one run down?

I sure hope something works out soon for you!

Keeping you in my prayers!    :smitten:



Living here is:

her 45 year old boyfriend. He does not work, he does play in a band. He sleeps all day and does drugs most of the night.
45 year old friend of theirs. He gives the girls a ride to school in the morning and picks them up in the afternoon, he cleans house once a week and mows the lawn. She fills up his gas tank, pays his car insurance and gives him money. She is under the impression that he babysits the girls for her. He gets free room and board and she doesn't seem to mind the drugs that he brings into this place. In fact, the truck that he drives was a gift from her for all the things he does for her.  ::)
Me, I'm 44 and do most of the babysitting, laundry and cooking and a little of the housework.
My 16 year old daughter who goes to school and works. She does her chores as willingly as most teenagers do.  :-\
Her 11 year old daughter who goes to school. She's not any better at doing her chores than my own is.  :-\
Her nine year old daughter who is ADHD and just plain mean.  >:( She goes to school.

I don't know why none of them can help her.


[...]  :oXo:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #18 on: May 06, 2009, 01:01:50 pm »
Hey [...],

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She told me that I have until the end of the school year to find another place to live. We're leaving, I'm just not sure where we're going

What is the status on you moving back in with your husband?   Have you put more thought into that one?   It sounds like your sister has quite the little zoo there.   :-\     I hope moving back in with your husband is an option.

Be sure and make time for you.  :hug:   Between living with a 45yr old, an 11yr old and a 9yr old, that house should be functional without you by now.   Especially if you think your sister can handle things by herself!   

I hope you can get some rest and get the moving situation figured out.  You sure don't need additional stress right now!

Keeping you in my prayers!   

Phyllis    :smitten:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: What do you do when ......
« Reply #19 on: May 07, 2009, 12:06:04 am »
If we moved back in with my husband, it wouldn't be until around the first of August. I just found out that my daughter signed up for some courses at the local JC and she won't be done until the end of July.

There are actually two 45 year old men living here. I was talking to the 45 year old friend today. He was mentioning how much money he could be making if he went back to his old line of work. I asked him why he didn't go back. He said it was because he makes out better financially here and doesn't have to do nearly as much work. Well, to run the girls to and from school, clean house once a week, mow the lawn once a week is not all that much work. Sis fills up his gas tank, pays for his truck insurance, gives him about $300/mo spending money, room and board. He's got it pretty cushy.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.