Author Topic: I think I kindled myself...  (Read 1439 times)

[Buddie]

I think I kindled myself...
« on: April 25, 2009, 06:56:14 am »
Hello again everyone,

So I'm now at around 6 months after finishing my taper from 4 mg Ativan, and things had been going pretty well.  I still experienced some vertigo and muscle pain, and occasional anxiety, but generally I've run about 90% of normal.  On New Years I dared to have some alcohol, and everything seemed fine.  I had some alcohol again in February, and I felt badly for a day or so after, but soon was back to normal.  I had some alcohol two weeks ago, and everything seemed fine for about a week....until WHAM! It feels like I've relapsed completely back into benzodiazapine withdrawl.  Terrible anxiety, shaking, flushing, sweating palms, muscle spasms, twitching fingers, feeling like I'm going crazy, realization, rubber band around my forehead, the whole nine yards.  It was much easier to deal with the symptoms when I knew they were related directly to benzo withdrawl, but now I'm not sure if it was the alcohol that might have caused it through "kindling", or some weird no-reason relapse, or if there's something else medically going on.  Has anyone else relapsed after their withdrawl from using alcohol? I'd be interested to hear if you have, since it took over a week for symptoms of the relapse to fully manifest after I had the drinks.  A physician I spoke with told me it's unlikely that these symptoms were precipitated by the alcohol, but they've also told me that having physical withdrawl symptoms 3 months out was impossible too... :idiot: God, I wish I'd followed the Ashton manual and abstained for 2 years, but no, I thought I could handle it.  My own stupidity sometimes astonishes me.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I think I kindled myself...
« Reply #1 on: April 25, 2009, 07:34:31 am »
Hi [...].For what its worth I am 69yrs of age.My advise is to abstain
from the booze.This is another drug that will poison your system as do the Benzodiazepines.Good luck. Vic     :)   
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I think I kindled myself...
« Reply #2 on: April 25, 2009, 03:23:19 pm »
Hi,

Wow, what a horrible thing to happen.  What you described as your symptoms fits withdrawal to a tee!  I'm so sorry for your pain.  It sure sounds like the alcohol threw you back into this doesn't it?  I've heard so many people say that alcohol works on the same receptors as benzo's, you seem to have just proven it.

I hope these symptoms leave you soon and you can get back to being 90% again.  I guess I feel pretty lucky, I don't have the temptation to drink. (20 years sober) It sure sounds like it messes you up.

Take care and let us know how you're doing....

PS...  Glad you're taking what the physician says with a grain of salt.

[...]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I think I kindled myself...
« Reply #3 on: April 25, 2009, 09:45:06 pm »
Yeah, it's really discouraging to have a relapse of symptoms like this.  I'm in the part of it now where the acute anxiety seems to have remitted, but there's this horrible depersonalization/derealization feeling where you feel like you're floating away and are just a robot in a world that's not real etc. etc. - almost just as miserable.  The twitching seems to have calmed down a bit, which is encouraging, but I still don't have any appetite.    Thanks for the kind words, I hope things settle down again soon!
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I think I kindled myself...
« Reply #4 on: April 25, 2009, 10:32:54 pm »
It sounds like your body is righting itself fairly quickly, I'm glad.  I can't imagine the fear you must have felt when all of your symptoms reappeared.  I know I could never go through withdrawals again, it was too hard.

I hope you continue to heal and you aren't tempted to tempt fate again!  Benzo's seem to keep giving for years.... :pokey:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I think I kindled myself...
« Reply #5 on: April 25, 2009, 11:02:46 pm »
Hello again everyone,

So I'm now at around 6 months after finishing my taper from 4 mg Ativan, and things had been going pretty well.  I still experienced some vertigo and muscle pain, and occasional anxiety, but generally I've run about 90% of normal.  On New Years I dared to have some alcohol, and everything seemed fine.  I had some alcohol again in February, and I felt badly for a day or so after, but soon was back to normal.  I had some alcohol two weeks ago, and everything seemed fine for about a week....until WHAM! It feels like I've relapsed completely back into benzodiazapine withdrawl.  Terrible anxiety, shaking, flushing, sweating palms, muscle spasms, twitching fingers, feeling like I'm going crazy, realization, rubber band around my forehead, the whole nine yards.  It was much easier to deal with the symptoms when I knew they were related directly to benzo withdrawl, but now I'm not sure if it was the alcohol that might have caused it through "kindling", or some weird no-reason relapse, or if there's something else medically going on.  Has anyone else relapsed after their withdrawl from using alcohol? I'd be interested to hear if you have, since it took over a week for symptoms of the relapse to fully manifest after I had the drinks.  A physician I spoke with told me it's unlikely that these symptoms were precipitated by the alcohol, but they've also told me that having physical withdrawl symptoms 3 months out was impossible too... :idiot: God, I wish I'd followed the Ashton manual and abstained for 2 years, but no, I thought I could handle it.  My own stupidity sometimes astonishes me.

Hi Sorrow,

I am sorry that you feel not so good, staying away from liquor is a good thing to do while the receptors begin to heal. You shall be ok, just keep healing and don't give into the temptation of having liquor.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I think I kindled myself...
« Reply #6 on: April 26, 2009, 03:59:43 am »
Yeah, it's really discouraging to have a relapse of symptoms like this.  I'm in the part of it now where the acute anxiety seems to have remitted, but there's this horrible depersonalization/derealization feeling where you feel like you're floating away and are just a robot in a world that's not real etc. etc. - almost just as miserable.  The twitching seems to have calmed down a bit, which is encouraging, but I still don't have any appetite.    Thanks for the kind words, I hope things settle down again soon!

Don't beat yourself up too much, Sorrow.  I have gotten a few waves of symptoms like that since I quit last July and I don't drink at all. They seldom last longer than a week. 

I know that dp/dr can be a symptom of anxiety so maybe yours has gone underground for a while.  Keep doing the things you did to lower anxiety when tapering, let this wave wash over you and out to sea.  You'll be back to feeling good again before long.  :thumbsup:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I think I kindled myself...
« Reply #7 on: April 26, 2009, 02:40:38 pm »
Hi Sorrow,

I found this last night and found it interesting about the alcohol...

Quote
Once the benzodiazepine addicted or physically dependent individual has successfully withdrawn from benzodiazepines they should avoid taking even occasionally benzodiazepines or cross tolerant drugs such as alcohol, barbiturates or the nonbenzodiazepines Z drugs which all have a similar mechanism of action for between at least four months and two years, depending on personal biochemistry. This is because tolerance to benzodiazepines has been demonstrated to be still present in patients who have discontinued benzodiazepines between four months and two years post withdrawal. In these patients even once off low dose re-exposures to benzodiazepines typically resulted in a reactivation of the tolerance and benzodiazepine withdrawal syndrome.[99][100] Alcohol even, mild to moderate use has been found to be a significant predictor of withdrawal failure probably because of its cross tolerance with benzodiazepines.[6][101][102]
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: I think I kindled myself...
« Reply #8 on: April 27, 2009, 11:39:28 pm »
Hey Sorrow,

I too am glad I read this!  I've heard repeatedly not to drink while tapering, so I quit when I started. 

Quote
I wish I'd followed the Ashton manual and abstained for 2 years,

You just said something I didn't know!!  Glad I didn't celebrate benzo freedom next week with a drink!   :o

Thank you for sharing your story!


Phyllis   :smitten:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.