Is your sex drive in the pits?

I wrote a previous post on whether people got their sex drive back and was grateful for one response, so thought I'd see if there would be more responses to people who still have problems.

 

I just started a new relationship and this is so sad.  Climax takes longer and is not as strong. It's almost 8 months out. I know it's benzo because this has never happened to me before.

 

Anyone else commiserate? Or have hopeful experience?

From the male perspective, yes, I've lost a lot of interest.  It seems to pop up every now and then, but nothing like it used to be.

I have the viceverse problem: I am obsessed of sex. I am thinking the most part of the day. It's very exhausting.

Sparkinson, I had the same problem during interdose withdrawal. It went away to nothing. Frankly, I would just enjoy it.

 

kiryu69, sorry. This is my worst fear, that it doesn't come back like before. Even worse than the fear of cog fog or tinnitus never going away. So I will keep on eye on it. Most people say it comes back but my fear is that it's not quite the same. It has come back some for me but it's 7 mos out and that's awhile already. I suppose I need to wait the full 2 year PAWS which is terrible in the meantime.

 

Thank you both for sharing.

 

 

From the male perspective, yes, I've lost a lot of interest.  It seems to pop up every now and then, but nothing like it used to be.

 

It makes sense that some of lose our sex drive, because benzos numb us. I completely lost mine for quite a few years. I thought it was my age (64), but now I know it wasn't that - it was the benzos I was taking. Im sure that the opposite can be true too, for some people.

east

From the male perspective, yes, I've lost a lot of interest.  It seems to pop up every now and then, but nothing like it used to be.

 

 

Well... I'd like to say that I'm with it enough to come up with something witty like this, but, unfortunately, it was purely by accident 

:laugh:

Uh, I wasn't going to say anything, but.............................................

east

 

I have the viceverse problem: I am obsessed of sex. I am thinking the most part of the day. It's very exhausting.

I had a seizure, and I'm certain, brain damage from that and all the glutamate storming from these benzo's for almost two years now, so nothing going on now with me.  My brain's fried.

i had the anorgasmia symptom for about 6 months and i was devastated and thought it would be like that forever. thank God it came back but climax still takes a long time for me and not as strong like Thaler said. for me, it's the nerves in that area. it was mostly numb for the first year or so and now it's just starting to unravel a bit and not be so numb. i expect it to come back full force and even better at some point! it will for you too, don't worry. you're so early out.

During my taper and now 5 months after jumping, I have absolutely no libido at all .... ZERO.  The thought of or desire for sex never occurs.  When approached in that manner, it has absolutely no effect on me at all.  I'm still so sick from this who benzo journey, that I'd rather just curl up in a fetal position on the couch and hope for the sickness and misery to stop.

I'm glad I'm post menopause now, hormones have calmed down.

Hey Becks,

 

In what way have hormones calmed you down?  Just wondering as I will be 49 this year and I'm guessing it will be just a few more years before I reach menopause.......  Because of the benzo taper I have no way of knowing if some of what I'm feeling is the w/d or pre-menopausal x/s.....for example, sometimes I get the cold sweats and chills at night......and at random times, I sweat profusely. 

For the first few months post-jump I had wild libido swings - from total disinterest to having to have it right that very minute - and the quality of the orgasms was really terrible. It felt like they weren't reaching my brain at all. Now things in that department are calming down and nearly back to normal, so there is hope.

Well your replies confirm for me that yeah, my orgasms are not as strong as they used to be and it's not in my head.

 

I took some zinc yesterday and it seemed to help. My little theory is that zinc got depleted during that intense hyper-sexual phase in my interdose withdrawal. So who knows.

 

I feel pretty sure that I've permanently damaged myself. But I'm going to wait the full two years.

Hi Thaler,

Seems like a lot of us think we are permanently damaged, and I doubt that many of us really are. This seems to be one of those weird things about benzo w/d...the notion that we have some disease or are brain damaged. I know I thought both of those things. I still have some worry about the brain damage, but each month brings  a little more healing and Im starting to doubt the whole idea.

Im curious why you said ""Im going to wait the full two years." Why do you assume that it will take that long to heal?

east

Two years is the time frame I hear for alcohol PAWS. Ethanol and benzos are close and I've heard the same time frame for benzos. I do get discouraged but thank you for your words of hope.

My sex drive is toast too and has been the whole time on benzos as well but nothing like when I jumped. Every now and then it comes back but nothing like before. Orgasms are not nearly as good and I'm lucky to even get an erection when I'm in the mood.

brunnettescorpio, I read somewhere that the age your mom went into menopause might the age you do, too.  I think the benzo w/d can amp up the perimenopausal s/x's or it could be a combo of both: hot flashes, sweating, etc.  I get cold chills inside my body while my hands and feet can remain warm.  Now that's messed up.  I had my periods more often and closer together and heavier.  Tiredness more often and lost some strength, irritability more and not wanting to put up with crap anymore.  Lost interest in the opposite sex. 

I never think about it anymore. Too depressed and/or anxious, whatever the cause is. Honestly can't remember the last time I even felt turned on; it has been months.

yeah zinc and other minerals are good to keep the body remineralized for good orgasms but i read that most of the really good intense earth shattering orgasms come from having a healthy supply of oxytocin.

The first week after jumping I too was obsessed with sex, but it hurt.  I lost interest for several months after that (very unlike me).  The drive has slowly returned.  I think I'm roughly back to normal now.