Cut past Friday - Ran a half marathon today!

Over a year ago I registered for a half-marathon (13.1 mi). I wanted to get off Lexapro and use running to help me get there. I was only in second week of training when I had a horrific bout with anxiety and never made it to the race. Not only did I not get off Lexapro, I landed myself on 0.75mg of Klonopin. I got very sick. I asked for a registration refund, but the organizers told me it wasn't an option. Instead, they offered a new registration for 2014.

In March, I started my w/d. After reading Spark by John Ratey, I vowed to run 4-5 times/week during the process if I was physically able to do so. All the science-based research pointed to the fact that exercise has immense benefits for anxiety and drug withdrawal. I have kept up that end of the bargain. My w/d has not been easy - some days I just wanted to throw in the towel - but I am certain that running made it much more manageable.

In the thick of my w/d, I re-registered for the half-marathon (thanks to badgering of my friends). But up until a couple of days ago, I was still on the fence whether I would run it. The longest I ran the last 6 months was 9 miles (once). This past Friday, I made the last cut of my morning dose - leaving me with a measely 0.05mg of k-pin at night. So I was really unsure if I would be in the condition to run anything, much less a half-marathon. But I really really wanted to. I wanted to run because it signified the fight of the human spirit in the war against big pharma. I wanted to run because anxiety disempowered me last year and I wanted to take that back. I wanted to run because damn it, screw you benzos! 

Barely with 3 hours of sleep under my belt (because of w/d and getting up at 5am), I went to the starting line. I ran my little heart out. My goal was just to finish, I had no time set for myself. Not only did I finish, but I finished strong (under 2 hours!). As I write this, I feel tears well up. I wasn't sure I would actually make it to the start line, much less the finish line. But the human spirit is amazing, through our sheer will we reach seemingly unrealistic goals.

My benzo buddies. Our road to recovery is filled with setbacks along the way. Our battle is challenging, but not impossible. Even if it takes a year to get somewhere, we will get it done. Perhaps bruised up, out of breath, and tired - but we will get it done.

-LDR

Longdistance, I did not have any marathons, half or whole, in mind but now that I read this, you have inspired me.

Not running a marathon but preparing for one sounds great. I have never run in my life so I realise it will not be easy.

I tried running  last month and I loved it, but  it made me too sick. So this is in my to-do-when better list.

I wanted to run because it signified the fight of the human spirit in the war against big pharma. I wanted to run because anxiety disempowered me last year and I wanted to take that back. I wanted to run because damn it, screw you benzos! 

this is reason enough to get started. Thanks, I hope to be able to post you soon with updates !

Your quote would make a great t shirt. Mumble mumble.

For now, I am copying this to  my ispirational quotes .

Thanks so much.

Sky!

Thanks for such kind words- they mean a lot. I am so glad you are putting it on your "to-do-when-better" list. I think you will find it fulfilling both emotionally and physically. I have never run a half marathon in my life either before today. Still hasn't quite sank in

-LDR

WOW! CONGRATULATIONS! I love how you said you went to the starting line and ran your little heart out! Sometimes that's what we have to do, whether it's a literal race, or just a regular Tuesday 

Mariposa

Over a year ago I registered for a half-marathon (13.1 mi). I wanted to get off Lexapro and use running to help me get there. I was only in second week of training when I had a horrific bout with anxiety and never made it to the race. Not only did I not get off Lexapro, I landed myself on 0.75mg of Klonopin. I got very sick. I asked for a registration refund, but the organizers told me it wasn't an option. Instead, they offered a new registration for 2014.

 

In March, I started my w/d. After reading Spark by John Ratey, I vowed to run 4-5 times/week during the process if I was physically able to do so. All the science-based research pointed to the fact that exercise has immense benefits for anxiety and drug withdrawal. I have kept up that end of the bargain. My w/d has not been easy - some days I just wanted to throw in the towel - but I am certain that running made it much more manageable.

 

In the thick of my w/d, I re-registered for the half-marathon (thanks to badgering of my friends). But up until a couple of days ago, I was still on the fence whether I would run it. The longest I ran the last 6 months was 9 miles (once). This past Friday, I made the last cut of my morning dose - leaving me with a measely 0.05mg of k-pin at night. So I was really unsure if I would be in the condition to run anything, much less a half-marathon. But I really really wanted to. I wanted to run because it signified the fight of the human spirit in the war against big pharma. I wanted to run because anxiety disempowered me last year and I wanted to take that back. I wanted to run because damn it, screw you benzos! 

 

Barely with 3 hours of sleep under my belt (because of w/d and getting up at 5am), I went to the starting line. I ran my little heart out. My goal was just to finish, I had no time set for myself. Not only did I finish, but I finished strong (under 2 hours!). As I write this, I feel tears well up. I wasn't sure I would actually make it to the start line, much less the finish line. But the human spirit is amazing, through our sheer will we reach seemingly unrealistic goals.

 

My benzo buddies. Our road to recovery is filled with setbacks along the way. Our battle is challenging, but not impossible. Even if it takes a year to get somewhere, we will get it done. Perhaps bruised up, out of breath, and tired - but we will get it done.

 

-LDR

As I sit here in a wave I'm reading your story and WOW! I have not run in almost two years due to Lyme Disease and benzo W/D! I have balance issues and inner ear stuff. I go to physical therapy and they asked mewhat is my goal and I told them to run marathons again!

So despite how I feel I will keep working, go to PT and by this time next year I would have ran a marathon!

Bravo to you and thank you for encouraging me!