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Yeah! Happy Window here today!


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Good Morning all!

 

I feel great for the first time in quite some time.  Probably a couple months.  I have a good window appearing this morning.  Mood is very good and zero anxiety so far but it's pretty early here.  I don't dare have a coffee or anything that might upset my system.  I'm taking this as a good, good sign.  I am 1/8 of a K pill and have been for about 3 weeks.  I had hoped to do another jump early but just didn't feel very good so I thought just relax the opportunity will come soon enough.  Today is my last day of work and I'm off to NewFoundLand tomorrow and my son is getting married on Monday.  This window is perfect timing!  Thank you!  Thank you! Thank you window!  I will be able to relax and feel and be happy on my son's marriage day hopefully.  Wish me luck!

 

Cheers! to all to us!

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Lol wishful wonderful thinking!  I'll cross my fingers.  I've had many windows. I consider myself lucky that I do get some reprieve. 
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Oh it's a happy day!! I decided to take advantage of this window and jumped off the clonazapam. Two days and no anxiety.  This is beyond awesome. I've been on this site for maybe 2 weeks and it has given me more hope and support than I've ever had in my life.  Truly the best stroke of luck I've had in 20 years!!!!! 
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The good news is that I've been off the clonazapam for almost a week now. Window has faded but I'm doing fine and moving forward. Waiting for my next window.  Feeling okay about it
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Nothing will stop me from recovery.  I am have been reading a wonderful book called "Emotional Freedom" by Judith Orloff, M.D..  I'm on a chapter that explain two things that will help in my recovery and tells me how they are important in my happiness.  One is to remove fear and become courageous.  The other is practice patience and feel better.  It's true... it really is true.  If you look at our bodies... expecially how our nervous systems work.  One of the first steps to transformation is to reprogram the biology of fear and courage. This book explains how to do it. If we think through courageous thoughts and show patience we truly feel better. It's a good read and I recommend this book to any one that suffers from depression.  :thumbsup:
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I'm actually feeling better than expected.  My depression is a little better now and I have taken the jump last night and ridded myself of my last hell raiser.  No sleeping pill and I actually got some sleep so I'm so excited and happy about my future.  I'm ready to ride any wave that comes my way.  I'm totally on the mend and feeling so positive about it.
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I'm doing ok.  I didn't sleep very well at all last night but just taking it in stride.  My mood is ok... I"m kinda just numb.  Not happy but not sad.  I'll roll with it.  I don't have any drive to do anything but I keep attempting little bits here and there and living with accomplishing very little but trying to relax and take it in stride.  I don't have any pain so this makes things much easier.  I have aches and pains that come and go but they are nothing compared to some of the pain that I have felt in the past.  I got the worse ear pain during the time i was taking paxil that was so excrusitating that I had to just live through that minor pain is really just a non issue.  I am always sitting feeling on edge and I dream of the day where I could actually sit and relax.  But I still consider myself very lucky here.  My withdraw symptoms are very annoying but when I read what others have to deal with I thank my lucky stars that mine just seem to be annoyances.  I hope one day my tintinitus and ear pressure subside.  Some days are worse than others and when in windows they completely disappear so maybe, just maybe one day it will be gone.  I"m having to deal with being more anxious as the day goes on but I'd rather have it in the evening than all day long so again I count my blessings.  I still have huge issues being around my father.  He's 91 and worries about me and continues to ask questions and tells me what I should and shouldn't do and always gets my anxiety going.  I have to deal with constant guilt of avoiding him.  He's in great shape but I know his days are numbered. I'm without a job.  I've been having a hard time finding something that I can handle for the last two years.  I need to get some ambition to start looking again.  I'll go a few more days ignoring this issue and concentrate on relaxing and trying to get decent sleep.  I'm waiting for my next window so I can get a bit of a to do list and get some of my life in better order.  I'm just going with one day at a time.  Life is ok but I know it will get better.
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