Hang in there! 32 months off - the windows are getting to be really awesome

[[Buddie]]

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[[Buddie]]

Hi [...],

I never view your posts as bragging but always as encouragement and hope.  Keep posting and I will be there continually reading them.  Your words give me courage and brighten my days.

My symptoms are improving at 3 1/2 months out but seem to vary all over the place.  And the way waves and windows present themselves changes and shifts.  The windows used to come on suddenly and be extreme, great feelings.  Now they come on more gradually and never quite reach a full 10 - more like an 8-9.5 and the waves don't make me feel like I'm dying anymore.

What's bad is that inner strange chemical anxiety that feels related to the nerve pain.  Do you recall when the edgy, chemical stuff went away?  I feel like when it goes away, so will the nerve pain and sleep issues from head pressure.

Thanks for any advice or time guidelines.  This does feel gradual to me.  But of course, not healing fast enough.  Sigh.

[...]

[[Buddie]]

Thanks [...]!

[...]

[[Buddie]]

Man, [...], I don't see how I can wade through is crap for years...tomorrow will be the start of month 6-I can't believe how stupid I've gotton...I cannot for the life of me tease out complex ideas, like how thyroid interacts with benzos (thread I just cannot understand no matter how hard I try) other things have come up that I CANNOT wrap my mind around.  I used to be kinda intelligent HAH!

The insomnia is as bad as it ever was, if I don't get a good 4 hour chunk soon, I just don't know what will happen...as far as stress goes-how on earth can I live without stress, especially given the fact that I'm trying to make it on $875 a month and meet all my health care needs?  Nevermind about that pesky eating habit.

Congratulations, [...], but damn...32 months....

[[Buddie]]

Your not bragging just helping others.  As far as what you can do to help, well I think you have already done that with the post.

[[Buddie]]

So you did heal in a linear way [...]!

They say it's never linear, but I feel I heal linearly too...

[...]

[[Buddie]]

This is such an encouragement! So happy for you!

[[Buddie]]

[...],we have printed out three things on benzo buddies. What is happening in your brain. [...]'s supplements and your last update. I will now print this one!!! I read them when I can understand them a little. My Husband reads them when I can't. I have also been bedridden for a year. I now use a cane and a walker because of the dizziness and nausea. I have found a new doctor and we asked her to please read the copies that we brought. Whether she will or not we don't know; but we really emphasized that BB was our "new" guide line. She seemed open to at least hearing us out. We had to do some thing because I could no longer look at my Doctor who told us a year ago that the benzoes had been gone for six weeks and it was obviously physiological. If you have the time I would love to hear from you.
h2h&husband

[[Buddie]]

[...] - thank you. Please keep posting when you can.

[[Buddie]]

I still have bouts of fairly painful symptoms off and on  and some things that are with me most days but I am much more functional these days and subsequently have been spending less time on the forum. Also, out of the handful of people I have kept in touch with most of them are doing a lot better now and don't come around here much.

It helps when you start to see your own experience and the experiences of others who are going through the same thing validate the idea that healing does happen.