Author Topic: Are You Glad or Sorry You Updosed or Held?  (Read 5925 times)

[Buddie]

Re: Are You Glad or Sorry You Updosed or Held?
« Reply #120 on: April 15, 2014, 05:40:44 pm »
   
I should have stated that I include tapering months with the post benzo months for healing because healing occurs while tapering as well.
[/quote]

I think so too, at least I bloody well hope so !!!!!!!!!
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[Buddie]

Re: Are You Glad or Sorry You Updosed or Held?
« Reply #121 on: April 15, 2014, 05:43:42 pm »

I totally ballsed that quote...  :laugh:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Are You Glad or Sorry You Updosed or Held?
« Reply #122 on: April 15, 2014, 05:44:54 pm »
I said I wasn't going to get sucked back into this post again but it pains me to say I feel a necessary evil to say something:

[...], I want nothing else to see you get better and off these drugs. To heal and move on with your life bc it appears that the process has been very overwhelming for you, especially the length at which you choose to taper. I seems like over time and the longer it lingers it can become an obsession in itself, this is only my opinion and not fact by any means. But I can understand how this happens. It must be horribly frustrating and miserable for those who suffer for years.  Without judgment, you do realize you smash those for posting horror stories with very dreary details when you yourself post dreary details of your own experience quit frequently. And of all the posts I have seen since being on this board, you are posting quite a lot.....about how you feel, what you think, and your personal opinions of healing. Freedom of speech must go both ways, without judgement. YOU have been given the opportunity to post as you wish and as you feel at any given moment and I think you should give everyone else the same respect without judging their posts for whatever reason YOU don't agree with. Because many of us have read your long long posts of your journey and been respectful and cheered you on bc isn't that what we all want? Acknowledgement that this sucks, to get support and compassion?

And as for knowing what would have been or the future of any of us. That is not possible. No one knows this. No one. This is life. Even in benzo wd. No one can know for certain what would have been or what will be. My in laws called me after driving all the way from Texas to ND when they were 15 miles from their home telling me they made it. They were killed in a car accident 5 miles from their home. No one can know what the future holds. No one. So we hope and we fight and we support. But again, this may just be my opinion and beliefs.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Are You Glad or Sorry You Updosed or Held?
« Reply #123 on: April 15, 2014, 05:49:19 pm »
Anyway, back on topic, NO, I have never regretted updosing or holding... by doing so has got me out of some pretty nasty holes... One tends to know when one is in one and often the safest course of action is to remedy it... go back to where you felt better and hold and then make a slower descent after a safe period of time has passed, in my opinion, the brain will adapt to lower doses but we can sometimes get too far ahead and that is when it is better to back track, pushing through symptoms can be a disaster... but it all depends on what each person can tolerate I guess... but in general, if in a very bad way, it sure does not help to push on further, that's just asking for huge problems... trust me, I did it once and it was the biggest mistake I made in what has otherwise been a pretty sensible taper... other than that I should have taken breaks earlier on.

Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Are You Glad or Sorry You Updosed or Held?
« Reply #124 on: April 15, 2014, 05:55:02 pm »

[...], I know I would suffer if I went faster, because I have been there and yes, I acknowledge that I post a lot also but trust me, there is a LOT that I have never posted on here and where possible, I share the good also and I ALWAYS put warnings and say that I am a long term user and not to compare... I also frequently say I am at 85% baseline now... so it's by no means all bad... look back at any of my blogs and you will see many positives also...

You are right though, this can become an obsession which is why I am out of here now... I feel OK today. I am merely debating this stuff as usual... I know, tell me to go get a life... but also remember you are on here again too.  ;) :D :laugh:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Are You Glad or Sorry You Updosed or Held?
« Reply #125 on: April 15, 2014, 06:03:43 pm »
I don't know - I am a bit split on the topic. I have only a few times updosed and more recently decided to hold my cuts longer which has helped some weeks and not so much other weeks. It is all too variable, which for me is the nature of w/d.

What I do NOT want to do is updose every time I am going through a difficult situation or my physical symptoms get bad as that will only serve to train my brain that I cannot do this, that or the other w/o the help of updosing. I expect to be outside of my comfort zone during this time but yes there were a couple of times I did updose but very far and few.

Instead of updosing I am more likely to hold my dose a bit longer to see if that helps.  I had been through this 5 years ago and cut way too fast and ended up in protracted for a pretty long time. This time around I am going slow and steady but want to see net gains in my cuts and find ways to navigate through the tough times. I am now closer to the authentic me then I have been in quite a while. I welcome the smell sensitivity because it is a reminder that I am no longer so blunted  - I did not even know I was blunted - thought my muscles spasms were the only thing that had gotten blunted. Finding light in the darkness is a wonderful thing.  8)
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Are You Glad or Sorry You Updosed or Held?
« Reply #126 on: April 15, 2014, 06:03:54 pm »
[...], I am always supportive of others and I appreciate the support extended to me, I always have done, all I am saying is that I do not agree with anyone posting endless graphic descriptions of suffering without ever mentioning the good also... that is all I am saying, if there is good stuff and improvements share that shit too you know??? I could come on here and write endless spews of my suffering and go into great detail, trust me I like to type as most members here know by now but there is a lot I do not post on here... I have suffered a lot and half of the stuff I have been through I have not shared on here because I don't think anyone would benefit from it.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Are You Glad or Sorry You Updosed or Held?
« Reply #127 on: April 15, 2014, 06:08:22 pm »
I don't know - I am a bit split on the topic. I have only a few times updosed and more recently decided to hold my cuts longer which has helped some weeks and not so much other weeks. It is all too variable, which for me is the nature of w/d.

What I do NOT want to do is updose every time I am going through a difficult situation or my physical symptoms get bad as that will only serve to train my brain that I cannot do this, that or the other w/o the help of updosing. I expect to be outside of my comfort zone during this time but yes there were a couple of times I did updose but very far and few.

Instead of updosing I am more likely to hold my dose a bit longer to see if that helps.  I had been through this 5 years ago and cut way too fast and ended up in protracted for a pretty long time. This time around I am going slow and steady but want to see net gains in my cuts and find ways to navigate through the tough times. I am now closer to the authentic me then I have been in quite a while. I welcome the smell sensitivity because it is a reminder that I am no longer so blunted  - I did not even know I was blunted - thought my muscles spasms were the only thing that had gotten blunted. Finding light in the darkness is a wonderful thing.  8)

Nice. I am also finding I am more me now than I have been in many, many years and that goes to show we are healing [...], keep on keeping on, we'll get there... I may just have to start pushing ahead by holding in future (not pushing on down when symptomatic but holding without going back)... Seems as if the discomfort does pay off and it is not really realistic to expect to be symptom free all the time but it helps to minimize it where possible...
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Are You Glad or Sorry You Updosed or Held?
« Reply #128 on: April 15, 2014, 06:10:47 pm »
Glad to hear [...], I could tell! Indeed the micro-taper makes it easier to recover when we are not at equilibrium. I too would get hammered if I tried .10 cuts since that terrible cut I did at 1.75 to 1.60. Luckily for me, I have been able to control and expect (mostly) what would happen if I cut too much or didn't hold long enough.
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.

[Buddie]

Re: Are You Glad or Sorry You Updosed or Held?
« Reply #129 on: April 15, 2014, 06:11:44 pm »
[...], I like it here on bb. I never once said "get a life" in my post to you. In fact, I was being sympathetic and showing compassion of how difficult it must be to be healing and tapering yrs out. I don't know what my fate is or will be tapering off 4 mg of X without co. But I do know I will find support here on bb and I am grateful for that. And I truly hope that you cont your taper, feeling 85% right now as you said in a taper is a dream for some of us (I haven't even been 50% in the past yrs before my taper) so good for you!, and hope you reach 100%! I ll be waiting to hear all about it  :thumbsup:
Suggestions, opinions and/or advice provided by the author of this post should not be regarded as medical advice; nor should it substitute for professional medical care. Consult your doctor before making any changes to your medication. Please read our Community Policy Documents board for further information.