What is happening in your brain?

[[Buddie]]

.

[[Buddie]]

[...], this was great, great, great!!!!

[...]  xo

[[Buddie]]

What [...] amazing post, [...]. This one gets printed. 

I'm so glad your beautiful brain has obviously healed. It is a gift to the rest of us.

Thank you for sharing your knowledge!
 
[...]

[[Buddie]]

It is quite evident that in some ways you are a lot farther along in healing than I [...]. No way, no how could I have written something like that.

And I read the whole thing. I would usually pass over something that long but it was well written and contains lots of good info and analogies. I especially liked how you explained that our brains are not broken, they are doing what they are supposed to do under the circumstances. Something about that struck a chord with me.

[[Buddie]]

Thank you so much for your WONDERFUL post!!!!!  That is one of the most comprehensive enlightening posts I have read throughout this arduous journey.


I wonder why some of us have a much easier time than others.  I would really appreciate your insight. 

[...]

[[Buddie]]

[...],

Yours is a good question. I have NO idea.  I have NO answer for that one.  I can't even figure out why some people can just "ditch" benzos in a week and someone like me is a year out and laying in bed like a moron in a wave.
That's just the START of my questions!

I also think that while these are all benzos, they aren't all the same medication. They work a LITTLE differently depending on the benzo - and the half [...] has something to do with it, too, IMO.  Like -if you take a short half [...] drug (like Xanax) once a week it's out of your system in a few hours- you may NOT adapt to it brain-wise.  But if you take a LONGER half-[...] drug (like valium) once a week, it's in your system ALL week and you're getting inhibition all week long - and even that may cause a neuroadaptation over time.  But then there are SO many factors to control for - what drug, how long, half-lives, frequency and amount, genetics, how did you taper, are you blond, brunette, or [...] head?   Seriously, even if you COULD control for all the external factors, the internal way each person's body is affected is just too individual. That's why - yeah - you could get this symptom or this one - or all of them, but it's unlikely you'll find anyone with the EXACT same experience.  And that's what we all want - someone who had it JUST as bad and can understand EXACTLY what we are talking about.  But it's not likely. What IS likely is that we all have the same brain parts. And if they ARE affected, the brain parts themselves do the same things in all of us. If my amygdala is hit and yours is hit too, we're gonna be scared of the moon together.   And at least in that sense, at least both of our amygdala's work properly!  Um - a little TOO properly thank you.
But at least we can look to brain and body structures to explain our symptoms. 
Why some people only have certain symptoms and others are hit with like - everything - is beyond me. I had mostly mental and some physical.  Others are like mostly physical but they aren't feeling like the raving lunatic I was.  Thank God for them.

I"ll never truly get it!

[...]

[[Buddie]]

[...],

Yours is a good question. I have NO idea.  I have NO answer for that one.  I can't even figure out why some people can just "ditch" benzos in a week and someone like me is a year out and laying in bed like a moron in a wave.
That's just the START of my questions!

I also think that while these are all benzos, they aren't all the same medication. They work a LITTLE differently depending on the benzo - and the half [...] has something to do with it, too, IMO.  Like -if you take a short half [...] drug (like Xanax) once a week it's out of your system in a few hours- you may NOT adapt to it brain-wise.  But if you take a LONGER half-[...] drug (like valium) once a week, it's in your system ALL week and you're getting inhibition all week long - and even that may cause a neuroadaptation over time.  But then there are SO many factors to control for - what drug, how long, half-lives, frequency and amount, genetics, how did you taper, are you blond, brunette, or [...] head?   Seriously, even if you COULD control for all the external factors, the internal way each person's body is affected is just too individual. That's why - yeah - you could get this symptom or this one - or all of them, but it's unlikely you'll find anyone with the EXACT same experience.  And that's what we all want - someone who had it JUST as bad and can understand EXACTLY what we are talking about.  But it's not likely. What IS likely is that we all have the same brain parts. And if they ARE affected, the brain parts themselves do the same things in all of us. If my amygdala is hit and yours is hit too, we're gonna be scared of the moon together.   And at least in that sense, at least both of our amygdala's work properly!  Um - a little TOO properly thank you.
But at least we can look to brain and body structures to explain our symptoms. 
Why some people only have certain symptoms and others are hit with like - everything - is beyond me. I had mostly mental and some physical.  Others are like mostly physical but they aren't feeling like the raving lunatic I was.  Thank God for them.

I"ll never truly get it!

[...]

I took 2mg's of Xanax at night for insomnia for 12 years.  I've been Benzo free for six weeks or so and have very few symptoms.  The most persistent and God awful side effect has been insomnia, but even that's starting to randomly even out.  I really didn't have any negative emotional s/x at all.  As a matter of fact, everyone I know thinks I'm a lot easier going off benzos.  It's just so weird.  I [...] I don't get slammed belatedly.

[...]

[[Buddie]]

Great read, [...]. I love how you made the distinction between our MINDS and our BRAINS. I have often tried to describe my symptoms as feeling as if they are not "me." I might actually feel ok, my mood might be good, I can recognize I have nothing to worry about... and yet, there all these symptoms are: depression, worrying, obsessions, etc. I've gotten so used to them by now that I can recognize this "double-emotion" feeling. My "true" feelings (in my mind, the [...] me, I guess) and all that crap that's running through my repairing brain. It is the most odd sensation, having both your true self's emotions and all the wd side effect "emotions" (said in quotes because they are fake) running through your mind. I always fear someone will think I've got a split personality if I try to describe it to them 

And if it were NOT healing, you would not be having those symptoms.  ANY part of the brain or body that needs to heal is going to "experience" something in the form of symptoms - and you are going to notice that.

Can you go into this in any more detail? I don't quite understand why each part of the brain actually has to give off such bizarre (ad incredibly painful) symptoms as they are healing.

[[Buddie]]

[...], my own personal belief about that has always been based on the fact that some of us are born with much more sensitive nervous systems than others. This is a scientific fact, and these sensitive individuals are found in all species of mammals. I know I [...] most definitely one of these "highly sensitive people." I always have been, and it has never been pleasant. Couple that with yet MORE nervous system sensitivity, and well... you get the idea. I imagine those whose nervous systems are naturally "tougher" (only for lack of a better word) would do better. Unfortunately, I think we sensitive people are by nature more likely to need to be prescribed these drugs.

[[Buddie]]

[...], THANK YOU......... your thorough and complete explanation was fantastic!  You explained all in a way anyone could understand.      Hugs, [...]