I really need help

I did an over rapid taper in May of 1mg Xanax after almost 20 years.  After unbearable withdrawl insomnia and anxiety I was reinstated on Aug 2 and updosed with a plan to stabilize and slow taper.  Now at 2.5 mg daily.  I feel awful, headaches and zero motivation  This has resulted in still not much sleep, anxiety and depression.  This is hell on earth and I’m so afraid of what it’s doing to my family… especially my husband.  I feel like I and my life are rapidly disappearing.  Help please. Anyone else done this kind of thing?  How did you get back off?  Go to detox?? Or what??

I'm sorry, but detox is a very bad idea.

 

There are no shortcuts.

 

I would advise to stabilize and then go slow. Maybe consider a crossover to Valium.

 

The only thing you can do to speed up recovery is eat healthy and lots of exercise.

 

I hope you feel better soon, stay strong 🙂

Hi there,

 

I agree with SnelleJelle that it is a good idea to take your time to stabilize and consider crossing over to a longer lasting benzo like Valium. This could take awhile but in the long run, could prove to be worth it. I have heard nightmarish things about detox centers because they don't know what they are doing and they pump you full of more drugs and then just send you home, basically to cold-turkey. With benzos you need to take it slow and let your body decide how fast or slow to taper. I would check out the tapering resources here on Benzobuddies. I think you can find them on the home page.

 

I actually understand what you are going through because I rapid-tapered off 4 milligrams of Clonazepam. I finished the last 1 mg in 3 months and I went through complete freaking hell. The acute withdrawal was insane and I didn't sleep "naturally" for over 3 years. You do not want to do what I did. I NEVER reinstated. I ignored what my body was telling me and it was telling me to reinstate. I pushed through and boy, have I suffered. I do not want you to go through what I went through... It is good that you got back on the benzo. Now I would suggest stablizing and formulating a plan to do this long slow taper thing....no rapid tapering and no cold turkey. Its just not worth the pain, suffering, and harm to your brain and body.

 

Wishing you all the best and sending you lots of healing wishes.

I do not have advice but wanted to send comfort and hugs. This is NOT easy and it's not a sign of weakness on your part. Dr. Jenn Leigh said this pill will show you who is boss; not the other way around. I think you will find success going slowly. I did the same thing; was on a short time, got off because the weird symptoms were freaking me out and reinstated after 8 days. I have now been tapering since May 1st and am down from .5mg of K to .16mg. You will get there but super rapid tapers are so, so difficult to weather. We are here for you <3 I am married with two young kids so I understand the fears very closely. Also, make sure you have a taper plan. Somewhere around 5-10% of a cut every 2-4 weeks off your last dose is a good gauge.

Thanks for the love and support. Started an antidepressant today hoping maybe, just maybe it will help with the sleep and get me to a point to start the taper.  Depression has reached a new level of hellish.  Just trying to survive day to day.  Love to all ❤️❤️

I hope that the AD helps you and you can get some sleep. It  is hard to do anything when you are in a state of chronic insomnia. Best wishes.

So I tried the Cymbalta for 4 days was sick as a dog, intrusive thoughts and laid awake at night so I discontinued after 4 doses. So hear I am.  I think reinstatement was a big mistake but here I am.  I have lost faith in my psych who basically is letting me dose myself and tells me I just haven’t found the right dose yet.  If I keep updosing I will never be able to live my life at all.  I am sure the Xanax is making me sick and depressed as well as the lack of sleep.  I am scared to death and have no clue which way to turn.  Please, please any advice.  Has anyone been here and found their way out?  If I could just sleep…..,

So I tried the Cymbalta for 4 days was sick as a dog, intrusive thoughts and laid awake at night so I discontinued after 4 doses. So hear I am.  I think reinstatement was a big mistake but here I am.  I have lost faith in my psych who basically is letting me dose myself and tells me I just haven’t found the right dose yet.  If I keep updosing I will never be able to live my life at all.  I am sure the Xanax is making me sick and depressed as well as the lack of sleep.  I am scared to death and have no clue which way to turn.  Please, please any advice.  Has anyone been here and found their way out?  If I could just sleep…..,

 

Doctors don't know anything (some do, most of them are idiots when it comes to mental health.)

 

You have to do it yourself and educate yourself.

 

Xanax is a potent drug. You should consider crossing over to Valium AFTER you stabilized. Right now you need sleep and rest.

 

If you're really desperate for sleep, a low dose of Seroquel helps (Not more than 25 mg, and certainly not above 100, that would make you less sleepy). It knocks you out. But beware, this is a heavy drug with its own withdrawals. I'm just putting it out there, just in case you're really going insane. It knocks me out every night. But it's really a last resort.

 

 

How far do I go to stabilize?? I’m up to 2.5 per day and started at 1mg. Do I have to become a zombie??

How far do I go to stabilize?? I’m up to 2.5 per day and started at 1mg. Do I have to become a zombie??

 

The problem is that you did a rapid taper after 20 years of use of a potent drug.

 

Your brain is still in shock. Time is the only healer.

 

Next tine, I would advise to go slow.

 

I've been on this stuff for 17 years. I wouldn't dare do to a rapid taper, it would be unbearable.

 

 

I've been on hold for 4 months to finally be a little better, just to give you an idea. It just takes a lot of time with the brain.

How far do I go to stabilize?? I’m up to 2.5 per day and started at 1mg. Do I have to become a zombie??

 

That is a significant increase.....1 mg to 2.5 mgs. 

 

I agree with a previous suggestion to read other posts on this site to get a good idea of what direction you will want to take. Personally, I found Valium caused toxic depression...it occurred only in the morning hours and would lift once I got up from bed. So if I were to do a taper over again, I would probably rethink crossing over from Ativan to Valium. My dose was a lot less in comparison to the doses you've been dealing with though. But, still, Valium caused a depression I had never encountered!

 

That's why it is a good idea to read as much as you can from people's accounts(we are all different in terms of what we were on/how long/dosages/etc.). Even then, you need to tailor whatever decisions you make to how you are feeling. Sadly, this whole ordeal can be extremely difficult to navigate.

 

I hope for the best for you...hang in there.