Fear I have messed up my taper

[[Buddie]]

Hello. I tapered down to .75 mg of clonazepam. On February 1, 2023 I began weighing the dose to taper. I took the .75 and weighed it in on a scale using grains. The number registered was 3.86 I then took a five percent cut and the number was 3.66. I split the 3.66 dose in threes since I take my doses three times per day. My husband helped me and since I can't find a milligram scale anywhere we used the grain setting. So for this month February I have taken 3.66 each day. I did notice though some of the pill cuts in the daily dose are different sizes.   My husband said the scale won't lie and we are measuring weight in grains so it will look different. I'm having some horrible symptoms this cut and although I can get out of bed it's hard to do very much but I do push myself. I'm worried I have taken a larger cut by weighing since the doses look different in regards to the pill size. Then I'm worried I'm kindling my brain if I'm taking more or less on a given day. Micro tapering isn't for me lol. I prefer the cut and hold. Can someone please advise me. Thank you

[[Buddie]]

I think your body is telling you very clearly to slow down your taper and make smaller cuts.
What kind of scale are you using?

Here is a thread that discusses using a scale http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=273984.0

And here's a link with an example of a scale many members use for tapering:
https://www.amazon.com/Smart-Weigh-Precision-Milligram-Calibration/dp/B011J88S8M/ref=sr_1_1?ie=UTF8&qid=1541012152&sr=8-1&keywords=Smart+Weigh+Premium+High+Precision+Digital+Milligram+Scale+with+Case%2C+Tweezers%2C+Calibration+Weights+and+Three+Weighing+Pans%2C+50+x+0.001g

[[Buddie]]

You are probably doing everything fine.  In fact, you are on a large dose, most people on large dose can just cut their pills into 1/8 bits and then reduce 1/8 bit even 2 weeks (without concern about the 1/8 bits being slightly different). 

All types of tapers will give withdrawals.  Try not to put so much of your energy getting the exact measurements.  It just creates more anxiety and anxiety feeds the withdrawal pain.

The trick is to find something you can tolerate.  Have you tried a simple water method.  Watch this video.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whpciMUXHfY&list=PLq27kC29XVsNRJ38NeslvT14h2j0UQjEf&index=2

[[Buddie]]

I'm using the smart weigh gem 20. The scale works fine I'm just wondering if I would get a more accurate weight if I weighed in milligrams verses the grains. I'm not sure how to measure in milligrams with the gram setting. I'm not good at math. I was a social worker for my career before retiring. We all used to say we chose that career because we could not do math ha ha. I called a pharmacist and of course he told me I don't need a scale just cut by 1/4 every two weeks. I just wish more people were educated on withdrawal. My doctor is great, not the one who put me on these but the one helping me get off by allowing me to go at my own pace. He does not have any ideas on how to taper either. I'm so alone in all of this. Just questioning the grain setting verses gram being more accurate. I appreciate your guys response and ideas.

[[Buddie]]

I can give you some peace about your scale.

The conversion between grain weight and gram weight is 0.065.

I believe a penny in the USA (made after 1983) weighs 2.5 grams.

So if you put one penny on your scale, measure the grains and multiply by 0.065 you should get 2.5 grams.

You might try it again with 2 pennies to see you get 5 grams.

In short, grains or grams doesn't matter.  As long as you reduce from what you started with.

Please note, no scale is perfect.  But you do not need to be perfect.  Just have a consistent reduction.  Worrying about being perfect generates anxiety and anxiety makes withdrawal 10 times worse.

[[Buddie]]

Thank you for taking the time to respond to me. I really appreciate the reassurance on my tapering plan. It does bring me much needed relief. I also agree worrying makes my symptoms ramp up a lot.  The overthinking and fear has been difficult for me since I started my taper. Something I need to work on. Thanks again