Protracted healer

[[Buddie]]

I wanted to pop in quickly and say it took me 6 years to heal. I was on here under a different name for several years. Traumatized80. I was the most horrific case I had ever seen. I was poly drugged after 1 panick attack. I spent 14 months in and out of a psych ward, temporarily lost my nursing career, gave birth with over 150 sx and so much more.

I can't honestly go into such detail because its caused severe PTSD.  I was in SEVERE acute withdrawal/brain damage for 3.5 years. I spent 90 percent of my days screaming I'm agony and clinging to anyone that would tell me I would survive. In my eyes I am a walking miracle right now.. anyone that knows my story will vouch for me.  After 4.5 years I was still very debilitated but was able to return to work 2 days a week.

I spent the next 1.5 years slowwwwwwwly healing and never believing that some of the remaining acute like symptoms would go away.  This is why I wanted to come on and briefly say I am doing okay. I know some of you answered my messages every single day an old pretty much kept me alive in my darkest times.  I believe there is a list of my symptoms posted under my old name. 

I hope this gives some of you some comfort.  I also believe that we must look at other causes. I believe the drugs were just the last nail in the coffin for me.  I had toxic breast implants, metal filling ect.  Once I had the implants removed and the mental out of my mouth I began to heal rapidly.  However, I do not want anyone to read this and assume all of my issues were from them.. I had the implants and fillings fir more than 15 years and my symptoms did NOT occur until the doctors poisoned me.  However, I believe the over load on my system having had these things plus the drugs caused a cascade if events.  I wish you all the best. 

If I can recover.. anyone can recover... I remained off ALL drugs and let my brain and nervous system repair itself. The body and brain have an anate ability to heal theirselves. I'm proof

I hope you don't mind me adding this but for those who are interested I found her list of symptoms and I'd like to share if that's okay. If there is a problem with me sharing this please let me know I'd be more then happy to remove it I don't want to upset anyone. Looking at your list... Wow, I just don't understand how someone can survive that. It's as big actually I think it's bigger then another person on this site named "MustangSaydee who I'll add his symptom list too. The point isn't meant to take away from your sufferings hell you suffered over 150 symptoms which is insane to me. I'm beyond sorry you had to go through that actually I don't really have words to justify what you went through and my heart goes out to you.
I'm only adding his list just in case if anyone has a symptom which isn't on your list maybe it will be on his, when I read success stories I often look for the symptoms first to see if I can gain reassurance and comfort which I'm unable to find in those success stories half the time so I understand what it's like to need to feel a sense of connection.

Thank you so much for your reassurance, I'd say you don't Know how much this means but I'm sure you do as you've been daily struggling unfairly.

Also side note I have permission from MustangSaydee06 to post his list we're real world friends in the same city. Please ask permission first prior to posting anyone else's experiences and content.

If it's alright I'd like to post the hero in question here which is Brighter days or as her previous account use to be named "Traumatized 80".

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=127018.msg1684426#msg1684426

MustangSaydee06:

http://www.benzobuddies.org/forum/index.php?topic=257286.0

Hope this helps someone and thank you again for coming back to share your success it's amazingly inspiring and I wish you nothing but the best of luck in your new found life journey

[[Buddie]]

Lexapro is a shockingly horrific drug. Most of the negative severe people I have talked to seem to have it in common. Funny as my doc said it was mild and had fewest side effects. Funny...I don't see an exploded brain and the other 150 plus symptoms I've had as mild and they sure weren't on the handout. I pray my kids get their mom back but I don't see how it's humanly possible. Too much damaged to brain and life to ever even begin to know how to move on from the trauma and loss

[[Buddie]]

Congratulations and thanks for posting your story.

I take it very seriously with the numbers as I am at month 37 and still have symptoms.

You wrote that the last time you used a drug was in January 2014.

You posted this success story on August 21, 2019.

You wrote that you were cured after 6 years.

From January 2014 - August 2019 is a total of 5 years and 8 months.

There is a difference of 4 months.

Can you enlighten us ?

Thanks.

[[Buddie]]

When you had your Covid setback, did insomnia come back? I’m currently dealing with that now at 12 months out.

[[Buddie]]

To clarify for anyone that is confused or feels mislead by my success story. If you read my story in entirety you will see I have POLY DRUGGED!!! It started with lexapro AND benzos and snow balled into a complete and utter night terror that unless you have lived, you can not fully understand or fathom! I BEGAN to recover at 3.5 years… I did not heal nor was functional until 5 years. My story is filled with horror. Those who have seen my videos or supported me through the horror will tell you. I have zero reason to exaggerate as it was horrific enough to make a horror film.  I am still doing very well Jan 2014 was my last drug ever.  The body and brain have an amazing ability to heal. Please know that! Im close to graduation from NP school and going into functional medicine. thinking of you guys always.. take care.

Dear [...]
Thank you so much for telling your story. I have nearly the same severe symptoms as you had, and I am 19 months off now and still suffering so bad. Your story gives me hope that this will be better one day.
Hugs, JB

[[Buddie]]

Thank you for sharing your story. I am sorry that you endured such torture for so long. And I am grateful that you are now symptom-free and thriving. Miracles do happen.

[[Buddie]]

Thank you for sharing. I am also pregnant and in horrific setback and your story keeps me alive.

[[Buddie]]

Still the closest story to mine I can find. Still somehow doesn't give much hope. She never describes brain sxs and other I deal with. Truly like my brain has been blown to bits and just won't go back together. If she's the worst that healed how on earth do I garner any hope

[[Buddie]]

Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for coming back and courageously sharing your story. It is the one that I keep coming back too and often the one that keeps me afloat in the darkest times. Please know that you have touched and saved at least one person. I wish for you all the very best.

[[Buddie]]

I wonder if she had neurotoxic encephalopathy