Nervous breakdown

I am really struggling right now. My health anxiety has been through the roof. I have had so many tests that have all been negative. I did have some issues this past month with having more phlegm I have to cough out every morning. I have had this since starting the clonazepam and it's not getting better. I started having some blood in my phlegm the past month which I know is not a withdrawal symptom. I went to the ear nose and throat specialist and he put looked at my throat with a camera and couldn't find anything wrong which made me think well if you can't find the source it's something terminal. He tried to reassure me I was fine but could tell I was an anxious mess. He ordered a cat scan of my chest and the results were negative. He has referred me for an endoscopy and I'm still freaking out thinking I'm dying. I don't have the bloody phlegm every day but maybe three times a week and it's not a large amount but in my mind they have missed something. I can't seem to be rational about all this and the chemical anxiety is so hard to shake. My brain will not let any worries go.

I'm soooo tired of going to doctors and have spent so much money on tests. But I get so scared I run to the doctor when some symptom pops up and believe me it's constant. I really feel like I'm losing my sanity. Does anyone else suffer with extreme health anxiety. It's an awful existence.

I’m so sorry the fear is over the top right now….. it can happen to a lot of us and especially bc we have to kind of plan everything out and keep up with everything wondering if somebrjnh is fine, is it not, should I see a Dr, is it fine? It just causes extra anxious feelings when we have to manage this and we are feeling so crummy and we just never know for sure what is ok to not look further into. So please give yourself some grace….. I was chasing my tail in circles at beginning of all this because so many things seemed off and psych said oh it isn’t the meds it might be some health issue etc. Ugh. Multiple scans, MRIs, endoscopy, bloodwork….. all was the dang benzo issues

 

So good job checking things out bc it does give peace of mind knowing you’ve done your due diligence and ruled things out. Try once you’ve done your checkups and scans to tell yourself ok, I’ve checked into things, I know x y z is a symptom so let’s just see how I do over next few weeks and if it changes or goes away or is on the symptom merry go round where it leaves then jumps back on etc

 

I had a lot of congestion for almost a year during this and bloody noses(never common for me), etc. could be some inflammation, dryness and then irritation. Is it a lot of blood? Hopefully once you’ve done your endoscopy you vane feel some peace knowing you’ve had chest x ray and your tummy looked at and those are a good view if there would br anything wrong.

 

Hang in there and hoping that settles and you can feel better moving forward. As you check into stuff remember to tell yourself ok, nothing showed up and I’ve done what I can to look into stuff…. So try to take a little peace in trusting the scan results!

 

Also I tracked symptoms every night in excel and it gave me a gauge when I wondered if I had some ring before and I could I search and find that I had when I couldn’t quite remember…. So might be worth writing or typing a little note each night on main symptoms and anything else notable from the day.

 

Hang in there!

Thank you so much for taking the time to respond. I appreciate your kind words. No it’s not a lot of blood but even a tiny bit makes me head into fight and flight mode. Thank you for your suggestion to track the symptoms. I’m going to do that. I wish you the best in your recovery. Take care