The advantages of abstinence that we see.

We were all hostages of Benzo. It definitely causes sadness. We have imagined more than once how our life would have gone if not for benzo. And if they could turn back time, they would never have become long-term benzo users. But what happened is what happened. And now I suggest that we all try to find the pros in our condition. What has changed in life, for the better? After the jump?

I will tell you by my example.

I saw my family from the other side. I didn't expect to receive such support, and most likely I don't even deserve it. I began to appreciate a clear mind. I am pleased that I can really look at many things without benzo glasses. I fell in love with the sky, it's gorgeous. It is worth raising your head, and your eyes fall into clouds and stars, in sunsets and sunrises, is it not a miracle. To see this, we don't need anything, just look up. You don't need a doctor, or a prescription, just raise your head. When you feel that everything is boiling inside you, look at the sky.This is the best substitute for any pill that is always above us, but we so rarely notice it. Sometimes I can't sleep, although I want to sleep, I toss and turn in bed for about an hour in a half-doze. Then I get up, go to the window, open it, and look up, take a deep breath trying to breathe the whole sky into my lungs. I feel calmer, I repeat it several times... Fill your lungs, try to inhale the whole sky above you, be an egoist at this moment. Leave the universe without a single cloud.

Try to count the seconds when you feel good, remember them. Every second. I fell in love with the heartbeat. It's a calm, steady knock, it's like a cradle. I had severe interruptions in his work, I constantly paid attention to it and was angry that it was not beating smoothly. Now this also happens, but when the heart is working properly, I feel joy.

I urge you to share your joys in such a difficult time for us. So that others can read and discover for themselves what they don't see.

Behind the veil of anxiety.

Having said:

- oh, yes, I have it too, and I didn't pay attention to it.

Considering this to be the norm for myself.

 

P.s. Sorry for the mistakes, I do not know English and use a translator. Since I am from Russia, I write in Russian and translate online. I decided to write this lying on the top shelf on the train, left the small town of Vladimir and go to the city of St. Petersburg

Your thoughts and writing are beautiful Tolp90, I found myself taking a deep breath while reading and felt more peaceful, thank you.

I agree, it's almost as if we were in a pharmaceutical prison for a long time, and now we're finally getting to see the light. I've been going to this park right down the street from me, and it's got tons of evergreen trees with all kinds of different needles and leaves on it. Whenever it rains, the rain beads up on it almost like a natural wax. Sometimes they are light green, and sometimes they're bright neon green, and there's others that are dark green. All kinds of red Cedars and Western hemlocks and different Pacific Northwest varieties of Evergreen trees. It's like Christmas, they're everywhere.

 

And I used to go to the beach all the time when I was taking pills, but it was more about the sports or the jet skis or the boats. Now I'm able to look at the grains of sand and the Pebbles on the beach, and sit on the Driftwood and look at the knots and different indentations carved out from the ocean. Sometimes I find little red crabs which have been half eaten by the birds, or you will find seaweeds with cool minerals attached. There's all kinds of stuff from the ocean along the shores and you can smell it, freshwater mixed from the rivers and saltwater from the pacific, and all of the minerals mixed together, the nutrients are good for your brain.

 

I completely understand the Stars thing, sometimes I sit on the beach and stare at the different constellations and look at all the different Stars and smell the saltwater. All of that kind of stuff used to bore me and I used to think it was stupid when I was taking pills, now I can actually enjoy it and it's about the only thing I enjoy anymore. All I care about is nature and having a stress-free life, that's all that I wanted naturally from birth apparently. Now that I'm on the other side of benzo withdrawal, it's almost as if I was hardwired to enjoy nature and not be around much of society.

 

Now I'm able to see my family's point of view like you were saying. They used to get mad that I was partying and doing lots of substances, they used to say I was making life harder on myself. They were right, all I really had to do from birth was eat good food and make money and enjoy the outdoors.

 

If I could go back, I never would have stepped foot in that psychiatrist office. It definitely made me a stronger person mentally, it gave me tons of experience Within life. Now I'm able to survive just about any predicament because of my knowledge and skill sets. I definitely wouldn't do it again though.

I agree, it's almost as if we were in a pharmaceutical prison for a long time, and now we're finally getting to see the light. I've been going to this park right down the street from me, and it's got tons of evergreen trees with all kinds of different needles and leaves on it. Whenever it rains, the rain beads up on it almost like a natural wax. Sometimes they are light green, and sometimes they're bright neon green, and there's others that are dark green. All kinds of red Cedars and Western hemlocks and different Pacific Northwest varieties of Evergreen trees. It's like Christmas, they're everywhere.

 

And I used to go to the beach all the time when I was taking pills, but it was more about the sports or the jet skis or the boats. Now I'm able to look at the grains of sand and the Pebbles on the beach, and sit on the Driftwood and look at the knots and different indentations carved out from the ocean. Sometimes I find little red crabs which have been half eaten by the birds, or you will find seaweeds with cool minerals attached. There's all kinds of stuff from the ocean along the shores and you can smell it, freshwater mixed from the rivers and saltwater from the pacific, and all of the minerals mixed together, the nutrients are good for your brain.

 

I completely understand the Stars thing, sometimes I sit on the beach and stare at the different constellations and look at all the different Stars and smell the saltwater. All of that kind of stuff used to bore me and I used to think it was stupid when I was taking pills, now I can actually enjoy it and it's about the only thing I enjoy anymore. All I care about is nature and having a stress-free life, that's all that I wanted naturally from birth apparently. Now that I'm on the other side of benzo withdrawal, it's almost as if I was hardwired to enjoy nature and not be around much of society.

 

Now I'm able to see my family's point of view like you were saying. They used to get mad that I was partying and doing lots of substances, they used to say I was making life harder on myself. They were right, all I really had to do from birth was eat good food and make money and enjoy the outdoors.

 

If I could go back, I never would have stepped foot in that psychiatrist office. It definitely made me a stronger person mentally, it gave me tons of experience Within life. Now I'm able to survive just about any predicament because of my knowledge and skill sets. I definitely wouldn't do it again though.

 

Thank you, I enjoyed reading what you write. I especially like evenings, regardless of whether I have a window or a wave, in the evening it is always more or less calm, sometimes it turns out to think well about something pleasant, without remembering the bad condition. I'm going to say the terrible thing. But I'm glad it happened to me. I began to appreciate my daughter, I used to appreciate and love her too. But I saw how smart she is and how much she supports me at the age of 11, even though she doesn't even understand what is happening to me. I have severe depression, moderate anxiety. My whole world has turned upside down and from head to foot, over these 6 months, this is the most powerful school of life, and I also think so, if we can get through this, then everything else will be subject. I wouldn't want to go through this again either, but damn it, there's something in it.

I agree, there's definitely something about it. I think for me, it was mainly because I had 3 years to lay around and think about everything that happened, and why it happened and the whole philosophical meaning behind it. I started to question why things are the way they are, and who they affect and how. I started to think about everybody's position in life, and what's important and what's not.

 

Now whenever I see a stressful situation, I look at the big picture of the world. For example say you have some bad politics going on in your country, it doesn't really mean anything to other countries. Or let's say that you lose your money or you get sick or something, it's not a big deal in the big world. Basically we are just some random animals running around on the face of the Earth trying to survive, nothing anybody does is very important. It might be important at the time to us because of the feelings we have, but it is almost certain that nobody else cares or even thinks about it. There's really no sense in being temperamental or having strong feelings about things, when we're only here for a limited time anyways. I guess soak in the good feelings and disregard the bad ones as much as possible.

 

I've learned the only important stuff in life is being comfortable and having good food, and trying to have the most nice stuff you can. I try to have good conversations with family and friends, and I just disregard the rest of everything in society. If you have good food and you are comfortable, and you have good people to talk to, then what else do you need? And then if you can add lots of money on top, that just makes everything look even better at home.

 

Whenever people start thinking about the politics of where they live, or the people committing crimes, or what's on the news, or what their employer did at work, and stuff like that, it's all psychosomatic basically. If you get it in your head and start thinking negatively, then all kinds of health problems arise as well. But if you can just eat good food and disregard all the bs, then you'll probably be pretty healthy.